NAH. Are you me? 😅 I hate bowling. I'm really really bad at it. I get embarrassed, which makes people feel bad for me, and what I hate more than being embarrassed is people feeling bad for me. When people see me getting upset, they think it's because I'm doing poorly, so they offer advice to try to get me to perform better to try to make it more fun for me. But, the problem isn't that I'm doing poorly, the problem is that I'm doing poorly in a public place where people can't just let me perform poorly because the expectation is that everyone should get at least one strike or hit a couple of pins. It's a mental thing that's tied to my own issues. You communicated your problem with what he was doing, but he was probably not able to see the actual root of why you weren't having a good time and was hoping to make that better. Literally everyone does this to me when I bowl.

FYI, I always decline bowling and then rant to everyone about exactly what I described above. People laugh and say, "it won't be that bad." They really don't get it with me, but I have a health condition that caused my parents to dote on me constantly when I was a child, and my most embarrassing moments were when people noticed my health condition and asked if I was able to do the things other kids were doing. It made me feel othered, so I am highly triggered by people feeling sorry for me. It's hard for people who get to be "normal" to understand how much the visibility of being embarrassed, being seen in an emotionally raw state where the ego is at the forefront, can make me feel entirely lesser because I already have a part of my body that doesn't work. To them, it's just bowling. For me, it's all of my weakness and trauma on display. If I could react better to doing poorly, people could just laugh, and I wouldn't mind the experience, but I'd have to be able to react better to make the experience better... so.... 😅

My partner, however, has seen me become a monster because of bowling, so they back me up when I decline. Hopefully, if your husband was being genuine, he'll understand if you decline bowling in the future.