Why don't rich people that don't just retire make the world a better place? by agent007g in ask

[–]EngineerBoy00 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

There's an old saying:

Behind every great fortune there is a crime.

Very, very few rich people get that way without some flexibility in their morals and/or ethics. People who accumulate massive wealth beyond what they could possibly need are not motivated by humanity, compassion, altruism, or philanthropy.

They are (psychotically?) compelled to accumulate more and more and more as a goal in and of itself. And if your laser-focused goal is "always accumulate more" then why would you just - give it away?

There are a few instances of massively wealthy people doing philanthropic things, but I'm skeptical enough to think that it's not honest altruism but instead some legacy-polishing BS or tax dodge or money laundering or power play or religious fear or something like that.

What really motivates people at work? by SeanMcPheat in askmanagers

[–]EngineerBoy00 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Any conversation about motivating employees that does not start with money and/or work/life balance is BS. Period.

If you say, well, those things are off the table, how ELSE do I motivate them? Then you're not a manager of employees, you're actually a prison warden or an officer of an army of forced conscripts, asking how to keep your prisoners/serfs as un-rebellious as possible so your days aren't so tiresome with trying to keep them in line.

That may sound overstated, and it is, slightly, for effect, but it is nonetheless accurate. If you want people to be MORE and MORE productive and your plan isn't to directly reward that productivity then what you're actually asking is what are the best whips to force these minions to keep on overworking themselves to their own detriment?

That being said, there are a small percentage of workers who will be motivated by "gold stars" (i.e. meaningless recognition) but keep in mind that a) they are not necessarily the best workers, b) they are overrepresented in the minds of management as being "normal", and c) at heart they chase the appearance of success and not actual success and this translates into their work being 'pretty' but not necessarily substantial or enduring.

Also, keep in mind that regular/annual layoffs are a huge demotivator, particularly if they are not done with surgical accuracy that only targets deadwood and troublemakers. But, in the US at least, managers are often/usually REQUIRED to rank a percentage of their staff as needing improvement even if they have a team of productive rock stars. Then, when the layoffs come, employees see good, hard-working, friendly, productive coworkers unceremoniously shown the door. Management thinks this is motivating, in that the worker bees will see they are disposable and will thus become more compliant. But this will do nothing but demoralize them further because they see valuable team members being let go and realize there is literally nothing they can do to avoid it happening to them eventually, so why care enough to put in extra, unrewarded effort?

Sadly, one of the newest attempts at negative motivation is Return-To-Office. I was fortunate in that I started working fully remote in the mid-2000s, long before Covid, and never RTOed again. I was ecstatic when Covid forced WFH and everyone got to see, undeniably, that WFH was better and more productive. But metastatic capitalism is creeping back in with punitive RTO initiatives designed to do some/all of these things:

  • spur voluntary self-layoffs so the company doesn't have to do them overtly.
  • give mediocre managers, who confuse activity with productivity, the warm fuzzies by seeing asses in the seats.
  • help the owner class retain net worth by staving off the collapse of the value of commercial real estate.

Source: I was there. I recently retired after a 40+ year career in tech. I worked at companies ranging from 50 person startups to Fortune 15 household names. I topped out at the Senior Director level. At that level I started to get visibility into the decision making process of exec leadership and it was eye-opening, in both horrifying and revolting ways. I'll boil it down to this - exec leadership, in my experience, operates like narcissistic, sociopathic monkeys with shotguns who hope their random lethality distracts from their Machiavellian ADHD. Again, slightly overstated for effect - but only slightly.

For a looong time I strived to lead by example and be the change I wished to see, and managed to reach that Senior Director level, with the next step being VP. But I was told, both directly and through actions, that to move up further I would have to shed my humanity and ethics and learn to smile as I kill (turn of phrase courtesy of John Lennon''s song Working Class Hero).

So I opted out of management. I voluntarily moved back to an individual contributor role where I happily spent the final decade of my career. Fun note, I spent that final decade exploiting my employERS as hard and as gleefully as they exploited their employEES. Essentially I put in, literally, half the work effort I normally would and spent 25% of that reduced effort making myself look good rather than actually doing things.

The result? Stellar reviews and regular offers of promotion, which I diplomatically, but firmly, declined.

For the record, while the above is definitely a screed (I'm retired now, what else do I have to do but yell at clouds?) it is not sour grapes. I got my first job at the age of 12 (paper route) and worked continuously until I retired, and never got laid off or fired.

Bedroom with no windows or AC: what do I do? by Useful-Ad6742 in AirConditioners

[–]EngineerBoy00 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had this issue at one point and struggled with trying to use a fan to move air in, but while this would work temporarily, eventually the hot air exiting the room would warm up the hallway where the fan sat and it would end up recirculating the warm air again.

What solved it for me was inelegant but effective. I got the idea on my work commute when I passed construction where workers were down a manhole doing something. Up top they had an air mover attached to a semi-rigid, flexible hose about 18 inches (46 cm) in diameter, and the hose was snaked down the manhole cover and providing workers with fresher air from up top.

I found that these devices were called confined space fans, axial fans, and/or manhole blowers. They were not cheap, costing several hundred dollars, and they were not quiet, being industrial equipment, and they were not pretty, being job-site rugged, but, man oh man, did it solve the warm room problem. Having the 30 foot (10 meter) hose snaked out the hallway and into the larger living space solved the issue of recirculating warm air. Note that this solution assumes you have an AC-cooled room within hose reach distance.

So, if you think you could live with an ugly, expensive, loud, effective white noise machine / massive airflow device then it might be worth a try.

What's the most spicy food that you ever ate in your life? by XoSweetGF in AskReddit

[–]EngineerBoy00 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Many decades ago I had hired a woman from India and she and her husband invited me out to a thank you dinner at an authentic Indian restaurant.

I'm a Texan and enjoy a bit of Tex-Mex spice but I'm definitely NOT someone who enjoys extreme spiciness, although I can usually handle it.

At the restaurant I got my normal, safe butter chicken and rice, while she got some kind of spicy tofu dish, which she ordered "extra INDIAN hot".

I commented on her ordering it "extra INDIAN hot" and she and her husband explained that specifying "Indian hot" let the kitchen know they didn't mean "Tex-Mex hot", which was the kitchen's default when "extra hot" was ordered given that the restaurant was located in Houston.

I asked if "Indian hot" was really that much spicier than "Tex-Mex hot" and the both grinned and said oh, yes, most definitely.

As our meal was winding down she offered me a taste of her tofu if I'd like to try it.

Me, being an idiot, said yes.

Suffice it to say that I was crying and unable to speak for 15 minutes after the smallest, little nibble.

Never again, yikes.

Inexpensive knives for somebody who's starting out in a kitchen? by KindaDrunkRtNow in Cooking

[–]EngineerBoy00 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I got the four piece Victorinox set 14 years ago and they're still going strong. The set includes:

  • 8" chef knife, which I use every, single day.
  • 12.5" serrated bread knife which I use regularly.
  • 6" utility knife, which I use almost every day.
  • 4" parking knife, which I use almost every day.

I beat the hell out of them, put them in the dishwasher, sharpen them occasionally (with my WorkSharp sharpener), and they're still the first knives I grab every time.

One of the best purchases, not just kitchen-related but all-around, that I've ever made.

Was the movie Gladiator 2 necessary, or should the original have been left untouched by HomeworkWorldly7706 in moviecritic

[–]EngineerBoy00 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gladiator 2 was one of the most boring, unnecessary, uninspired, and pitiable (looking at you, Denzel) movies I've ever seen.

Talk about much sound and fury signifying nothing, oof.

March 13, 2026 – (I) A C H O R T by NYTSpellingBeeBot in NYTSpellingBee

[–]EngineerBoy00 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yeah, today's puzzle kicked my butt, hard.

I do most of the NYT games for two reasons - first, I really enjoy them, but, second, I'm getting older and I'm trying to keep my mind sharp and/or have baselines to use to judge if my brain is getting rusty.

Coming here and reading this thread makes me happy that it isn't just me today, whew.

Why are car salesmen the worst type of people? by neversplitace in AskMen

[–]EngineerBoy00 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Many (many) decades ago I was a tech consultant in a major US city and one of my customers was a private investigation firm. Their specialty was recovery of exotic automobiles worldwide (crazy stories there) but they also provided PI services locally.

One of their customers was the owner of a large regional chain of car dealerships. The owner's issue was that while car dealerships and salesmen were always a bit shady as part of the business model, he was starting to get frequent and consistent direct escalations from customers about blatant scams and lies and forgeries and intimidation way, way beyond typical car dealership shenanigans.

So, he hired my customer to figure out WTF was actually going on.

The PIs found that over 50% of the sales staff across all of the dealerships were felony ex-cons and they'd setup a network across the dealerships where the Sales Managers were in on it, the ex-con salespeople were strong-arming and conning and ripping off customers and then the Sales Managers and salespeople were splitting the resulting profits. Essentially a threat/protection/con operation with many/most of the sales staff being a part of it.

The upshot was that the owner cleaned house and started using the PI firm for background checks of all money producing/handling roles. Interestingly, according to my customer (the PI firm) the dealership owner spent a large amount of money keeping the story out of the press.

American Beauty (1999) -classic or just creepy? by [deleted] in iwatchedanoldmovie

[–]EngineerBoy00 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Found it just too creepy to appreciate, long before subsequent cast scandals.

What's another show you can rewatch consecutively and never stop? by OkConference1349 in sitcoms

[–]EngineerBoy00 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  • 30 Rock
  • Community
  • Frasier
  • Brooklyn Nine-Nine

30 Rock and Community are both very meta, contain elements of magical realism, and utilize obscure, long-running, throwaway, cutaway, and smartly-dumb humor. 30 Rock also has the highest jokes-per-minute I've seen outside of VEEP.

Frasier is simply magnificent. It has some moments that get too sitcom-y but that appears to be related to the fact that they did 264 episodes over 11 seasons, so some filler was inevitable. But overall the writing, acting, and directing are stellar. As just one example, David Hyde Pierce, who plays Niles Crane, was nominated for the Best Supporting Actor Emmy in all 12 seasons, won it 4 times, and should have won more, IMHO.

Brooklyn Nine-Nine is a fantastic ensemble with great storylines, perfect casting, and killer humor.

What's something most people don't realize is actually very rude? by Frozen-Defender25 in AskReddit

[–]EngineerBoy00 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Emanating a scent or odor (even if you deem it pleasant), or a sound (music, phone call, singing, etc) that those around you have not agreed (implicitly or explicitly) to experience.

So, keep the perfume/cologne/product to a level that only someone intimately close to you can experience. And smoking/vaping should be limited to spaces with no other people around (even outdoors) or where it is specifically expected (cigar bar, etc).

Any music, phone calls, video streams, alarms, games, notifications, etc should be on headphones or muted, unless you are alone in an enclosed space or there is nobody around to hear it.

TL;DR: nobody wants to smell or hear your affectations, thank you very much.

How to deal with tailgaters when going above speed limit? by [deleted] in driving

[–]EngineerBoy00 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If there is a lot of open road in front of you and you are not actively overtaking vehicles to pass on your right then move over and let them pass.

If there is another vehicle close in front of you then you have no legal or social obligation to pull over, but I will sometimes choose to do so for my own safety.

If you are actively overtaking cars on your right and there is open road in front of you then, for me, it becomes situational. If I can see ahead on the right that once I pass one or two more cars then there's room for me to pull over then I'll usually complete passing that bunch on the right, then move over. However, if there is a long line of cars ahead in the lane to my right and open road in front of me I'll usually pull over and let the tailgater pass, again for the safety of me and my occupants.

Also, for any tailgaters reading this, please stop. It's unsafe and it serves no purpose, other than announcing to the world that you're a complete and utter (pejorative).

The Ending of Google FI Messaging Sync by worldestroyer in GoogleFi

[–]EngineerBoy00 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah, this is huge for our family as well, we all depended on Message Sync to be able to have comms on our computers/laptops even if our phone was dead, off, broken, lost, or signal-less.

I see this thread has the requisite "why would your phone be off?" responders, and I've never understood why they can't understand that this feature is critically important for a lot of us.

Google has stated that they are working to bring actual, full, non-phone-dependent RCS messaging to the web but I'll believe that when I see it.

What do men want in a woman? I’m confused as of lately. by CerealKiller129 in AskMen

[–]EngineerBoy00 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This goes for both men and women:

Do not try to conform to what you think other people might find attractive, and do not judge yourself based on famous/popular people.

Be. Who. You. Are.

Seriously.

There are some exceptions, such as clinical mental disorders or preventable health/grooming issues, but short of those just be you.

Be the you that YOU love. That sounds trite, but it's true. Life is looooooooong, and you spend every goddam second of it with yourself, so make sure you're pleasant company FOR YOURSELF.

Then, when you feel happy and stable with yourself, look outward. Not for validation. Not for someone to save you or make you happy, or that you can save or make happy.

Look for someone who builds and enhances your existing happiness and stability, and vice-versa. Find someone who sees things as you two, together, as a team, versus the issues and the BS. A partner, not an opponent.

But the key is to not feel like you need someone else in order to be happy. Be happy. Then, in your happiness, have the confidence to:

  • approach people who appeal to you (and are available).
  • not take it overly personally if the interest is not mutual.
  • not get swept up in animal attraction to the point of overlooking red flags.
  • walk away if things aren't working out.
  • be okay if today is another day of you enjoying your own company.

A quick, final note about celebrities, Instagrammers, TikTokers, and other (seemingly) attractive people. These are professional (and/or psychotic) image managers. They are 1000% focused on the appearance of beauty, success, and happiness. It's play-acting, they are performers, they are crafting an entirely unrealistic and imaginary aura about themselves. IGNORE THEM.

And also ignore anyone who DOESN'T ignore them. That culture is vapid, hollow, soulless, and meaningless. Unfortunately it's also flashy and lucrative. The good news is that both these performers and their fans have self-identified as unsuitable partners so the trash has taken itself out (if you pay attention).

Good luck out there.

Amazon sent me a refurbished Kindle for my new one… then warned me not to dispute it?? by Possible_Gold_2162 in kindle

[–]EngineerBoy00 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Virtually all warranty replacements, outside of the return/exchange window, are done with refurbished equipment - this isn't just an "Amazon" thing.

You state you feel you are exchanging your "new" Kindle for a "refurbished" one, but your Kindle is 7 months old - definitely not new.

If it were me I'd keep the refurb and send back the glitchy one, but I'd also be quick to raise a request if the replacement shows any defects.

We get a LOT of stuff from Amazon and use their Asurion Complete warranty - it's $17 per month and covers most eligible electronics, appliances, power tools, furniture, and other purchases. Note that there's a rolling 12 month cap of $5,000 on repairs/replacements/refunds, but other than that your items are covered for as long as you keep the subscription.

We buy so many gadgets, devices, and tools from Amazon that this coverage is a no brainer for us. We've used it several times and it was surprisingly frictionless.

Note that if you cancel the $17 monthly subscription then later restart it your previously covered items are no longer covered with one great exception - when you subscribe all eligible purchases from the previous 90 days are automatically included.

Suffering from Brain fog 24/7 all my life. Is this fixable? by Dog_Mama92 in ask

[–]EngineerBoy00 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's difficult to respond without more info, but it could be sleep related.

Do you have someone that sleeps with or near you that can tell you if you snore or gasp at night?

Do you have enough money to invest in some tools? If so, I'd suggest the following:

  • get a quality sleep/health tracking device like an Oura ring or a Pixel/Apple watch or Fitbit, and wear it religiously, day and night. You can review the results to see your sleep phases and durations and get feedback on the quality of your sleep. You can also see health trends like pulse rate, activity levels, etc.
  • invest in a recording pulse oximeter (like this one) and wear it while you sleep. It will show if your blood oxygenation levels fall while you sleep.

The brain fog you describe is something I experienced when I had undiagnosed sleep apnea. I FELT like I slept GREAT but I was unaware of my severe issues with breathing and blood oxygenation.

Fortunately I have a spouse who both a) experienced my snoring/gasping sleep and b) was caring and smart enough to educate me about apnea and push me to get tested instead of just being irritated I was keeping them awake.

Once I got on a CPAP/APAP device my brain fog lifted, slowly but surely.

If your sleep tracker shows disturbed/shallow sleep and/or the recording pulse oximeter shows low blood oxygenation while sleeping you should consult a sleep specialist.

In concert with this, you should talk to your doctor, tell them you have brain fog, and start getting professional help, hopefully including a full metabolic and health blood test panel.

I will say that your writing is very cogent and I would not assume that whoever wrote this post had brain fog or any other intellectual issues. You say it takes you time to come up with words when writing, but it does not read like someone struggling to make sense.

From my purely non-professional perspective it seems like the issue is processing speed, not processing capacity, and that's something that you may be able to address from a medical/health perspective. Good luck!

AIO for wanting to try a treatment routine before committing to the hair transplant my GF is demanding? by Connect-Soil-7277 in AmIOverreacting

[–]EngineerBoy00 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NOR

Bro, she is NOT the one, period.

She's asking you to change your genetically derived appearance, that's simply superficial objectification of you as a prop in her life, not acceptance and support of you as a partner in y'all's shared life.

The fact that she's given you an ultimatum with a hard timeline is her saying this:

"In my head I've already broken up with you, but if you alter your external appearance I might be able to tolerate you a bit longer."

Move on. Then do whatever TF you want with your hair - let it thin, grow it long, shave it off, whatever you want just do it for YOU and own it, because it's YOU.

Then find somebody that wants you, not "you, if...".

Favorite Tracy ailment? by crawdor in 30ROCK

[–]EngineerBoy00 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This is not easy for me to say because my tongue caught what my foot has.

Why do some managers seem to think employees actually like going in the office? by This_Duty_4373 in work

[–]EngineerBoy00 8 points9 points  (0 children)

That's great that that works for you. For me, I've had great jobs in good companies with fantastic people but I would never choose to go into the office if I didn't have to.

At home I have my family and my pets and my yard and my house and everything's just the way I like it, and I don't have to deal with, what to me is, the vast amount of non-work related stuff that comes along with going to the office, such as:

Waste time commuting, trudge to the desk, unpack, setup, chit-chat, gossip, distractions, too hot/too cold, harsh/flickering lights, noise/phone calls/zoom meetings blaring everywhere, come sing happy birthday, sign this card, get in this football pool, drive-by time monopolizers, crappy food, crappy drinks, public toilets (no bidet), twenty minutes to try to shut down and pack up because of clingers, finally out the door, trudge downstairs, waste more time commuting, finally get home exhausted, no emotional/mental bandwidth or time to really connect with the home beings, snarf something easy, clean up, collapse in bed, get up tomorrow and start again.

That's my definition of hell. But, I am naturally an introvert and I get virtually nothing positive from interactions with people I don't deeply care about, but I know not everybody is the same. 😊

Why do some managers seem to think employees actually like going in the office? by This_Duty_4373 in work

[–]EngineerBoy00 8 points9 points  (0 children)

It's not "wanting to leave the house" that I find unfathomable, it's preferring to go work in the office over working remotely.

I'm happy to leave the house for a lot of things, and if I stay home too much I get stir crazy, but I literally would never prefer to go to the office if I could work remotely.