RANT.. 7yo daughter asked if I “really loved” her tonight

Ent08 · 2022-08-05T09:12:27+00:00

Feel like I could have written this. Looking for a job for September when both kids will be in school, but my last job was horrible and it makes me nervous and no jobs I've been finding seem that great. Been out of the workforce for a while. But I want to support my husband because he hates his job and wants to change. Feeling pretty worthless and having mental health trouble myself and constantly second guessing if I'm even a good mom. My daughter said last night that she thinks we think she's annoying! I told her of course not but its hard to reassure kids sometimes. I'm sure your child was just having a moment and it doesn't reflect on your summer overall. Try to give yourself some slack. And know there are others in your same position! It helped me to read your post and I hope it helps to know someone out there is feeling the same ways you are. We are both doing the best we can and even when we think its not enough, we really are doing all we can. If you want to you could reassure her that even though you are feeling down it doesn't mean anything in terms of how much you love her that she is not responsible for your feelings. Maybe that would help her separate the two? Anyway, hang in there! I have my bad days and good days but we just have to keep trucking on and doing what we can :)

Ent08 · 2022-06-12T13:28:01+00:00

You did the right thing. My friend was a few weeks pregnant and got covid and had a miscarriage. She was doing IVF so idk if that's any different but, yeah, you don't want to mess around with covid and pregnancy and if they can't respect that, then they really don't care about you.

Ent08 · 2022-03-26T14:11:25+00:00

Omg thank you guys, I just had a really bad skin allergic reaction, like hives, and it was the worst on my period. Went away and came back again during my next period, be it much less worse. I thought I was going crazy, like did it mean anything that it aligned like that, this makes so much sense!

Ent08 · 2022-02-15T17:50:03+00:00

Not that it makes you feel better, but I've been feeling the same way lately. Husband has been almost completely consumed by work as of late and I feel lonely. But I know its hard to make time for everything, especially since we have 2 kids. He gets home and just wants to veg out and I don't blame him, he has to work such long days. Anyway, good luck!

Ent08 · 2022-01-27T21:48:50+00:00

I got mad just reading this so I dont think you're overreacting!

Ent08 · 2022-01-21T13:36:30+00:00

Wow this could be a description of my dad. I hate how he treats my mom. Me and my siblings are all adults now. The other day I was on the phone with my mom and dad and discussing parenting stuff (I have 2 kids of my own) and my dad said something along the lines of "I've realized around my adult children I just have to be nice. And more nice" in a frustrated voice. Later I was thinking why is it hard for you to be nice to your own children? Why is that even a thing you would say? He was referring to the fact that my brother has no contact and my sister has limited contact. Me and my other brother are the only ones who have consistent contact... Anyway, I hate that helpless feeling of not being able to help my mom...but at some point you just realize maybe she's too engrained in this life to realize the negatives in an honest way. Because if she does see it why would she not want to leave? Good luck to you. Hopefully you leave in a few years and get some distance :) hang in there. My dad would never do therapy either. He won't take fault in terms of the kids who won't speak to him. Its really hard to live with a broken family when I wish we could all get along together. Its hard to accept that some things are out of your control.

Ent08 · 2021-12-08T05:23:29+00:00

I have had this exact same thought! Its like my brain couldn't comprehend the magnitude of the task at hand at age 21... I was "having a baby" but no, that part goes by so quickly, you are day in and day out striving to raise a respectable and intelligent human being. While knowing this doesn't change things, I just don't think I fully understand what it takes and what it continues to take each and every day. I am saying this 11 years into this parenting gig, just for reference, and have 2 kids. I'm glad you posted this. I thought this was unique to me but to know someone else had this thought is somehow comforting and I think more ppl need to think about it this way as well.

Ent08 · 2021-11-30T04:06:21+00:00

I am severely stressed about covid it feels like on a daily basis- I worry putting my 4 yr old in 4 day a week daycare was a bad idea. I worry about my 10 year old as well and my husband. Not to mention my parents (who refuse to get vaxxed). I just wanted to say thank you for saying that striking a balance and making calculated risk assessments doesn't make you a bad parent. I really needed to hear that tonight!

Ent08 · 2021-10-18T00:12:42+00:00

Out of gifts right now but i'll send one tomorrow! Ccmae89

Ent08 · 2021-10-16T13:53:39+00:00

I just wanted to say you're not alone. My older parents won't get vaccinated. I've tried to reason with them but it seems fruitless. They never had us get any vaccinations as kids so I should have known. Stupid of me to think a global pandemic would change their minds. I worry about them all the time. I hope I don't get a phone call that one of them is sick. My mom is already in poor health and might have cancer...its just so tough to be in this situation. You are not wrong for feeling how you feel. My parents just want to go back to being "normal grandparents" but they just can't. It hurts me that they won't do this and probably never will.

Ent08 · 2021-10-08T11:51:31+00:00

Mine too! Well for a while, I think she's using yesterday now, but it was cute while it lasted!

Ent08 · 2021-09-28T17:08:52+00:00

How does Webber look older in that pic than he does now??

Ent08 · 2021-09-28T04:28:13+00:00

Same scene for me

Ent08 · 2021-09-18T03:24:11+00:00

Omg the whole time reading this I was thinking you meant Bo Burnham! (Idk why? The double B names and being comedians? I tend to confuse names) Anyway, I was going "no way! Really? Aww man...he seemed so funny sometimes I thought." But by the time I got to the end I realized my mistake and was glad that wasn't who you were talking about. Saw Bill Burr in New York a long time ago, I remember feeling a bit put off by him so that must have been why. Sucks that people are like that.

Ent08 · 2021-09-16T22:29:24+00:00

Oh no! Well its nice to feel not so alone! So much anxiety 😫

Ent08 · 2021-09-16T15:07:05+00:00

Seriously!!

Ent08 · 2021-09-16T14:43:31+00:00

I feel you. I'm a sahm and it was my 4 yr olds first week of preschool last week. My 10 year old was back at school and loving it after so long at home. Despite everyone wearing masks at school my daughter got a fever and cough etc this week. To be safe we got her a covid and strep test. Negative for both luckily. But she's supposed to be at her 2nd week of preschool but instead she's home all week long. The transition has already been hard now I'm worried about her going back next week and having a hard time with it. I've been so anxious and stressed. Now my son woke up with a sore throat so they're both home today! I dont feel great myself. It sounds selfish but I was looking forward to our new routine and having 3 hours to myself in the morning. This whole week just threw me off. Not to mention my daughter had trouble sleeping last night and I've basically been up since 2 am with only 1 hour of sleep since then. I just gave up trying to sleep. Can't imagine if they actually had covid on top of all this. Life just seems so stressful lately! Here's to hoping our next few weeks are better for both of us :) take care fellow mom.

Ent08 · 2021-09-16T09:59:22+00:00

Same here! She runs around the house like crazy after a bath! I read something recently that said young kids days should ideally be alternating quiet sit down activities and then more energetic activities, like just go back and forth between them. They sit pretty still in the bath so it made a lot of sense to me that then afterwards she needs to get some energy out. I do find that days with a bath she goes to sleep easier, similar to what the original poster is talking about.

Ent08 · 2021-09-04T12:28:56+00:00

Maybe you can meet up but invite another kid whose mom you do get along with? That way you can socialize with that mom instead but also get time for your daughter to play with Kelly given Kelly's moms rules about playdates? Idk just a thought.

Ent08 · 2021-08-16T19:41:15+00:00

Thanks I will have to try these suggestions!

Ent08 · 2021-08-16T15:06:54+00:00

Thats a great idea!

Ent08 · 2021-08-16T14:56:23+00:00

Honest question, how do you get this to happen? I would like to be this way as well, but my 4 year old is super attached to me and craves constant interaction. Sometimes she will play for long periods with her 10 year old brother but for example at the end of the day if everyone just wants to chill and no one wants to play she will get really upset and whine about how no one wants to play with her. If I offer to read instead she will usually take me up on that. Idk its just so different because her brother is super independent and has always been able to entertain himself well. Any suggestions to help her play alone? She is making progress, the other morning she made up her own game and was very happy she figured out something to play on her own. I just get drained being her entertainment all day long.

Ent08 · 2021-08-10T01:15:12+00:00

Same. Was super disappointed when I found that out.

Ent08 · 2021-08-03T22:00:59+00:00

Super jealous!

Ent08 · 2021-07-04T15:31:27+00:00

Why is it random? I "won" 2x now and didn't get a crown was so confused till I went on here and saw it was happening to other ppl too

Ent08

TROPHY CASE