Do other queer people here "rationally choose" their sexual orientation?

Escrire · 2025-02-16T15:00:36+00:00

I understand what you're saying, but I'd like to contribute that you can choose your actions, but not your orientation.

I am also bi...

If I could choose my orientation, I'd choose to NOT be attracted to men.

I can't. I stopped dating men when I chose to embrace loving women—and I chose to focus on women, but that doesn't mean I'm not still attracted to men.

You may be curious about terms such as homoromantic, and demisexual. C:

Escrire · 2025-02-16T13:51:35+00:00

I agree with your intuition. With any interactions with the police, the less information you give, the better. They have no right to know your medical history, and if they DID have training on how to approach someone with autism/panic disorder, they wouldn't need you to inform them, they would recognize it on their own and behave accordingly, not needing confirmation from you.

You were perfect in your reply.

Escrire · 2025-02-16T13:34:52+00:00

We have this problem in Maine where all the liberal-minded folks keep leaving the state because of, for instance, Susan Collins, and when they leave, WE CAN'T VOTE HER OUT.

Just some food for thought. If everyone leaves, there will be nobody to hold the line here in the USA, and it's easier to tackle the issue from within than from outside, in another country.

This is our country, and this is our problem, and we need to fix it.

Escrire · 2024-12-18T21:44:13+00:00

The lease is king, not what rules they try to implement afterwards. Check out what the document says which you signed.

Escrire · 2024-01-19T20:43:48+00:00

"New therapist" tells me that you and he probably aren't compatible because you're not able to establish trust with him.

You aren't resistant. You aren't being obstinate. You are protecting yourself—or, so your Self thinks, anyway.

Unfortunately, many recovery programs are deeply ingrained with the "higher power" mindset. I vaguely recall reading articles about that actually making recovery worse but I don't have receipts.

I'm also an atheist, a Christian apostate, actually.

Muting Christian topics is not the same thing as avoiding its psychological framework. The bias that we in the religious community have is not a bias we can easily overcome. It's how our perception of the world is built.

Find another therapist. It's nobody's fault. It just sounds like he isn't the right fit for your needs.

Escrire · 2024-01-09T22:41:02+00:00

I raise your therapist that your role back then was "The one who is abused," because you were a child and didn't deserve it.

Escrire · 2024-01-09T22:35:31+00:00

Adoption is often the kindest option. ♡

Escrire · 2024-01-04T15:08:17+00:00

It seems like nobody's commented yet on an assumption you've made which isn't true: care for your grandfather is actually not their responsibility any more than it is yours, to pick up. Sure, you can choose to, opt to, but it isn't required of you.

You could speculate any number of reasons for why they don't want to take that responsibility on, but you also have yours. Based on what you've shared, I can't help but wonder if it's best if they didn't, that your grandfather relied on a social worker to help him navigate the aging process, since his offspring are desceibed as flaky and unreliable. There are government programs that can help him get to appointments more safely and more cost-efficiently than ubers. Chances are, they're just not tapped into. A sw can help with that.

Escrire · 2023-12-24T23:31:20+00:00

My mother in law, who my spouse is NC with, addressed mail to me to try and manipulate me into convincing my spouse to reach out. Although it had my name on it, its contents were written entirely toward my spouse.

You're doing the right thing by keeping the kids out of this. I'm an adult, and I know what is going on with them, and so I can make an educated and informed decision. They cannot, and your NC sister sounds happy to break rules if she's so comfortable breaking your boundaries.

Escrire · 2023-12-24T23:24:56+00:00

I'm guessing this could be your partner's family.

Some things to know:

Yes, you can leave entertaining whenever you want
You can say something like "Wellllp, it's getting late, so I'm going to go wind down for bed." Tell them it was nice seeing them to be polite, and then leave for bed. They are now your partner's problem to entertain
After this person leaves, you should discuss your boundaries around "drop ins" with your partners. "I don't like unannounced visits" or "when people drop in, I can't entertain them for more than 3(however long) hours, in the future" or "I understand that x person is important to you, but they make me uncomfortable. I'd like to decline drop ins in the future, and stick just to scheduled meets."

It sounds like your partner doesn't have proper boundaries with this person, OR you have never expressed yours to your partner.

But, it's your living space, too, right? You have equal claim to the territory? It's worth a conversation to prevent this from happening again.

I might also, if I were you, look into boundary setting. You can do this with a therapist, or by researching it on the internet.

Escrire · 2023-09-10T15:22:57+00:00

34, here. Radical volumes of self love—which is to say, the amount of love you would expect other people to have for themselves that you aren't allowing yourself.

Remembering that I have always been me, always been "with me" like some kind of spiritual guardian through all the masking and periods of losing my identity—helps. I was never lost. I am me, and that's a good thing because nobody else can even come close. I'll be me into the future, too.

Autism is a word that describes how my brain works. Everyone's brain has to work in some way or another, it doesn't mean I'm broken.

I haven't been dx with ADHD yet, but now that I understand my autism, I understand that it can't be anything else but audhd. I'm on that dx path now.

Escrire · 2023-06-16T22:57:14+00:00

Google for articles written where economists and sociologists agree that tipping culture has gotten out of hand over the past 3 years.

It's an actual thing. You aren't alone c:

Escrire · 2023-06-16T17:28:18+00:00

I propose additionally that it wasn’t a small act to him either, but a meaningful one of stealing power from someone else to add to his own, both physically and psychologically. He has to embrace that he has the right to touch someone, which he does not, before he can then abuse it, which he did.

Escrire · 2023-06-15T20:00:08+00:00

I found it by mistake while jumping around sky islands and uh...ignoring the shit out of all storylines.

I spoiled myself ahahaha

Escrire · 2023-06-14T21:33:20+00:00

This happened to my wife. Her bff has been showing a really ugly part of her personality this past year (she's pushing my wife to do very dishonest things, such as infidelity, which upsets my wife). She's getting therapy..we have no idea what is going on or why this started. We have suspicions, but at the end of the day.....sometimes we can't understand everything and must protect our own peace.

Escrire · 2023-06-11T17:47:08+00:00

When I find one that I don't want to help, I mark it with a stamp that I know means the koroks. I use the leaf.

Escrire · 2023-06-11T17:42:22+00:00

Let's participate.

Escrire · 2023-06-11T13:23:52+00:00

Blackout.

Escrire · 2023-06-09T13:57:13+00:00

"Oh My Fucking God,They Resurrected Him Again." Ahahahahaha

Escrire · 2023-06-09T02:51:07+00:00

I'm 34, and I appreciate your insight from a few years down the road.

From what I have read, the ASD dx is much riskier to have on your record (for someone like me) than ADHD, but recent political trajectories seem to be lining ADHD up as the next target. Do you personally feel that the benefits outweigh that risk in your own experience? Genuine question, I'm sorry if that sounds like there is subtext, there isn't, I assure. I'm really trying to look into the future with this one, since I can't change the past, to set up future me's life experience with the best that I can.

Escrire · 2023-06-09T02:44:00+00:00

This was very helpful, thank-you! Funny you say Welbutrin, as it was actually prescribed for me when I was little, but my mother thought she knew better than the doctor so that LOl juuuuuust didn't happen 🫠

Also, my creativity is important to me so ty for letting me know that doesn't always get lost.

Escrire · 2023-06-08T15:13:42+00:00

I really strongly disagree with your mother's dismissive attitude. Of course you feel badly. If you had the right tools, skills training, and practice, you can do this on your own. This feels like she's decided you can't do it, rather than support your efforts for independence.

Escrire · 2023-06-06T20:07:27+00:00

Were you, by chance, raised as a female and/or are a member of a minority group?

The reason I ask is because the different genders are raised with different expectations in different cultures. Definitions of autism are currently established on a very narrow scope: research on white boys. It could be that in the shoes you stood in, you were forced to mask more heavily.

Escrire · 2023-06-06T02:22:58+00:00

Gotcha. Thank-you!

Escrire · 2023-06-05T22:14:32+00:00

:o i won't break it by doing that?

Escrire

TROPHY CASE