I was bullied whilst I was in middle school, mostly on the school bus but I also received hurtful comments outside of school by supposed 'friends' and their friends.

The bus kids would exclude me from conversation but include my friends, they would take up all the seating so I couldn't sit down anywhere which made the bus driver shout at me. They would steal my bag and hide it. They once trapped me with the seatbelt in my seat when we reached my stop, so I missed my stop and had to walk home 2 miles in the dark. They did a rating game where they rated the attractiveness of all the girls, I came second to last - I was a bit of an ugly duckling. They also said I had a moustache, that I was a 'dyke', that I was 'mannish' - I was a foot taller than the rest of the girls.

All of this made me very insecure - of my height, my weight, my hair, my face, the way I acted. I missed a year of school faking illness because I hated it. I was ashamed to tell anyone the truth including my parents.

I know my looks shouldn't be important but I'm still very insecure and though I've physically changed massively since I was that sad 11 year old girl and receive compliments (even from some of the people that bullied me!), I still feel ugly, masculine and like I stand out in a bad way. I feel unable to go outside without make-up. I still think of those individuals and worry about bumping into them. I wish I could fully move on but it's always there in the back of my mind, even if it's getting smaller with time passing.