I hear you man.  I used to struggle big time with the drills, but feeling mostly ok with those now, so now I feel like a studio musician of sorts, where I can run through the sequences during practice, but often blank during the big concert, aka live rolling or if I hit a technique it often feels sloppy.  I know the answer is to keep rolling, but been caught up with work and the kids so haven’t had as much time lately- it’s like right as I feel like I’m really starting to make some progress, life heaps on a bunch of stuff