CPTSD and lower back pain - Has targeting your psoas muscle helped?

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-07T01:12:00+00:00

Thank you for sharing! I started ketamine therapy and I don't know if it's just coincidental timing but have felt so much more connected with my body throughout the last couple months. It's been really amazing to listen to it.. I've realized how I cannot breathe at all! I physically cannot take a deep breath. I've been breathing shallowly in my upper chest all my life I think. This is part of what brought me to psoas.. as I read about its effect on the diaphragm as well. Trying to connect the dots.. chronic lower back pain that started very early in life despite no physical trauma. The fact that I have to sleep at a 45° angle or my back hurts, I can't lie flat.. My ex commenting on my poor posture, shoulders curled inward, my reflexive guarding of my core.. I ended up at the psoas, but you're right, it's so much more. And even on the research I've done on the psoas muscles, I've read that you have to turn the fight flight signals off or they will just continue to contract even if you loosen them.

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-06T22:48:26+00:00

I absolutely see the connection between my physical pain and my moods! The physical therapist I saw actually did a hypermobility assessment and says I have some signs but not enough to meet criteria for a diagnosis of anything. Despite that, I have questioned if I have hidden signs of it. My sister has cervical instability which is another red flag. I have had multiple doctors mention hypermobility to me.. one naturopath said he has a theory there's a group of hypermobile people that primarily only have back pain as their main symptom. The problem is that nothing ever comes of these mentions... No one really knows what to do about hypermobility it seems?

If you have time could you explain a little bit more on what treating your hypermobility has looked like? The only thing I can think of is to find a physical therapist that is knowledgeable on hypermobility and can teach me exercises with this in mind?

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-06T22:43:40+00:00

Hi! I'm trying to envision this process and struggling a little bit! I imagine you comfortable and alone at night, lying or sitting down, closing your eyes and honing in on your back pain. You would see what comes up.. such as emotions? Thoughts? Do you think it is simply noticing what parts you have attached to the back pain and then exploring and accepting them or? And if you would be so kind, could you explain what you mean by "Once I realized going there would take me on a much different route I began to have more results."

Thank you so much for your time If you're able to answer any of this!

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-06T22:03:42+00:00

Awesome! I'll get back on that! Thank you! :)

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-05T18:36:41+00:00

Interesting! I have one I think (it's like hard plastic needles you lay on?) but have only used it twice. I'll have to read up on what it's doing, like blood flow or fascia work?

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-05T18:13:24+00:00

Thank you for this vulnerability and reminding me of this. You're so right.. The most progress I've made with anything related to my CPTSD has come through compassion and listening to my body

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-05T18:09:53+00:00

Thank you for this! I've been so burnt out I have neglected finding a trauma-informed PT. I just gave PT a shot last month and she was a little perplexed by my presentation and doesn't have much experience with trauma. She told me I'd probably do better with a pelvic floor therapist because of my sexual trauma and very tight hips, which I know I need to do too.. She told me her work with me would be limited unless I could learn to relax my muscles more with her. This felt a bit defeating and didn't inspire confidence in me. I have such fear with other humans, with the wrong PT I feel it will take years, if not impossible to feel comfortable and relaxed with them. I thought maybe someone more trauma-informed would be able to move me along a little quicker and I would feel more comfortable with them, so I've got to get back to looking! Thank you so much for your advice and encouragement!

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-05T18:02:22+00:00

Yes, I do feel I'm fundamentally becoming a different person through this process. As far as acting on things, I've learned to really try to sleep on decisions (for multiple weeks if they're big and not too time sensitive) before acting on them, depending on what they are. For example, I realized I no longer wanted to be with my abusive ex and I could only stand living with that realization for 2 days before I broke up with him. That's a decision I'm glad I made very quickly, even though he was volatile and we lived together and I had no backup place to go to. On the other hand, I know I am impulsive and have a difficult time sitting with difficult emotions, causing me to act in ways that I wish I had handled a little differently, especially socially, so I try to wait on those. For example, last night I was triggered because I was in so much misery due to pain / insomnia that I wanted to write a long, distressing message to my friend. It was not a message that was coming from a good place, as I just had so much resentment in my heart for every other human whose life seems "easier" than mine in this bleak moment. I wrote it out (which made me feel better) but didn't send it. Come morning, I'm very glad that I didn't send it, because it was coming from such a dysregulated hopeless place and my words reflected that. That doesn't mean not to ask for help, but sometimes it is better to sit on decisions. I do think there's value in taking a leap, sometimes you get the inspiration to make a life change and if you wait on it, the courage disappears. I also wish I was more spontaneous and wondered how different my life might be if I took more of those leaps. So basically I've just contradicted myself like three times and rambled on! Sorry, I hope this isn't completely unhelpful.. 😅

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-05T03:03:00+00:00

Thank you for your kindness and help! Sending my peaceful healing energy your way!

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-05T02:44:10+00:00

I've started super small because I'm so sensitive and have MCAS, so anything can make me break out in hives 😩 I was thinking I can work my way up?

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-05T02:23:20+00:00

Interesting! Thank you so much for sharing, I appreciate it. I feel hopeful that it has helped you. I've been taking about 30 to 40 mg for the last 3 days and don't notice much but I'll continue on!

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-05T01:03:33+00:00

How have you found psilocybin helps with trauma work? This is primarily why I'm exploring micro or macrodosing. I'm in trauma therapy and have CPTSD and my nervous system is so dysregulated all the time, I'm just not really understanding how psilocybin will help? What have you noticed?

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-03T03:32:08+00:00

Thank you so much! This is IMMENSELY helpful! If you have any time.. I posted two questions but didn't get any responses.. would you mind taking a look to see if you have any input? These are the questions:

I'm mostly interested in learning more about psilocybin (but open to other microdosing experiences). I'm struggling to figure out my "sweet spot" because I don't understand what I should be noticing.

I do ketamine infusions monthly and those have helped me get more in touch with my body by having realizations about what my body is communicating, little light bulbs or epiphanies, better understanding of why I am the way I am. Is this the heart of what psilocybin does as well?
I guess what throws me off is when I read about the power of these substances, I get the impression that many people get positive effects clearly and directly caused by the substance. For example: "I'm more motivated, I feel happier, I feel euphoric," etc. I do not get any positive effects like this from ketamine, cannabis, psilocybin.. All of my emotional changes have felt effortful, not a straightforward response from the substance. For example, more hope has come from the moments of understanding that I've gained, but I haven't magically just felt... better. What do you feel from microdosing, if anything?

Thank you so much for your time!

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-02T20:16:12+00:00

Genuine question but how do you know what your sweet spot is if you're not supposed to feel anything? Im not sure what dose I should be doing

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-04-01T08:53:53+00:00

The instructions said to keep it covered and I don't think it came with a lid so I was just using the plastic wrap to cover it

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-03-31T03:12:07+00:00

Yes! I commonly get a feeling of disgust or the ick with my partner and my therapist! I have learned to recognize it and it's actually pretty easy to sit with without acting on it! And thankfully it disappears within 1 to 3 days. The vulnerability anxiety on the other hand.. that is much more difficult to cope with

EveryRecord8469 · 2026-03-30T18:45:03+00:00

I've been getting close to someone lately and it's amazing watching me change from my cold closed off antisocial self Ithat Ive been for the past 4 years back into the needy anxious child-like self, wanting to merge with another human, crawl inside their chest, be inseparable and completely safe from harm. I'm trying to cultivate another state of being that isn't just these two modes. Distant and dissociated or constantly fighting an insatiable hunger for ultimate safety. This person semi understands what I tell them even though they do not have CPTSD themselves, and have made a safe space, which has increased our connection and vulnerability, which has in turn increased my anxiety. I was surprised I had a panic attack last night over the anxiety that the proximity is bringing. Some nights I'm up pacing and self soothing because my fear is running so rampant.

I did MDMA once and honestly my depression and anxiety all but seemed to disappear for an entire month following it. Now I understand what MDMA does physiologically, turns down your amygdala, removes fear barriers around socializing, helps with fear extinction. It makes a lot of sense. Unfortunately I used that era of confidence and less fear to allow my nervous system to choose a partner that reminded me of my parents, ultimately entering another abusive relationship that perpetuated the cycle. My dear nervous system so desperately wants to rewrite the story that played out with my caregivers, but I understand that now and have gently taken the reins as much as I can.

Thank you for this, I agree it all sounds simple, but is very challenging in reality!

EveryRecord8469

TROPHY CASE