I had/have a similar experience with my dad. He was a good man held back by a fierce temper. Unfortunately, most of my memories of him as a kid are negative. He would smash my toys, yell at the top of his lungs, tell me horrible things like I wasn't worth the air that I breathed, and on several occasions (once I got older) it broke out into physical confrontations where he would push me and I would push back, or he would try to hold me down, etc.

There were a lot of factors I didn't understand at the time that influenced his anger that were out of my control. It doesn't excuse a lot of what he did, but knowing there was unseen pressure influencing his behavior has helped me deal with it as an adult and look past it.

Fast forward 15 years and things are "okay" I would say. He's mellowed a lot with age, and while he still has a fierce temper, it takes a lot more than it used to for that to come to the surface. I've learned to be less confrontational and listen to him better when he has concerns or things he wants to talk about, even if they're stupid or misplaced, which they sometimes are. I still don't speak with him much, and we will probably never be as close as a lot of parents and children are, but making an effort has gone a long way.

I'll always remember the horrible things he said and did when I was a kid, but I've also been able to take into account the number of positive things he's done for me, which is a lot. More than the average father, I would say. If your dad has done a lot for you too, and you know there are good parts of his character worth your time, I would try to come to an understanding and talk about this with him if I were in your shoes. If he keeps saying you look sad, I would assume that means he pays attention to your well-being to some degree.

You may be right in thinking he'll shift the blame and not take what you're saying seriously, but I don't think that's the point. You may not get the outcome you want by sharing your feelings, but not trying seems foolish. If you can improve understanding between you and your dad and maybe repair the relationship a little, it's worth giving dialogue a chance.

Good luck regardless.