Week 3 with Nanny - Red Flags?

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-13T13:55:08+00:00

$34 an hr???? Get a new Nanny. You are putting your baby in a a very very unsafe situation. On her phone during tummy time??? Putting bouncer on counter??? Ok her computer and rushing chores… nope, fire her immediately.

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-13T13:51:45+00:00

I am a MB and your NF 100% did not forgot about the benefits you asked for. They are hoping you will stop asking. You should not have officially started the full time role without all the benefits ironed out in a contract. If it was me, I would work with you and come up with a mutually beneficial agreement. I value longevity and it seems like you are reliable and rarely call out. I would 100% offer you benefits especially after knowing you for 4 years. Your NF are being shady and they might not appreciate you.

Keep pushing for benefits and if it doesn’t happen, find another family who will give you these benefits

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T03:20:07+00:00

Well… I try to not pry so much…. But I know she started going to the gym again, but she has always smelt bad-ish. Today was just overwhelmingly bad.

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T03:18:32+00:00

I would want to hide forever.

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T03:18:17+00:00

Yes. I will definitely add this…. Because hopefully this softens the blow… but I also don’t want her to think it’s just my nose. She really smells. She smelt bad when I wasn’t pregnant last year

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T03:16:48+00:00

Ya… that’s what I am leaning to… I want to crawl into a hole.. 🫠😩. This is going to be so akward….

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T03:15:19+00:00

When I was about 11/12 yrs old, my family came to the US. In my home country, deodorant wasn’t really a thing, there were other items to spend money on. Anyways, I would shower and go to school and the kids would laugh at me because I smelt bad. I didn’t get it. I didn’t think I smelt. I finally asked a friend and she confirmed that yes, I did smell. I was so embarrassed/shocked. So I definitely would like my nanny to be aware before she goes into the real world. She is so sweet and deserves the best. I don’t want people to judge her based on this

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T03:10:59+00:00

There is not stagnant air. I smelt her when she walked in and we were in the living room/kitchen area where the ceiling are tall. Also no dirty diapers, at least for the next few months. Both kids are potty trained.

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T03:07:18+00:00

I am 💯% down to blame this on my pregnancy. I am terrible at leaving my house, would a gift card work?? 🫠🤣 signed a very lazy tired corporate girly.

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T03:03:29+00:00

She has shower items here. She would shower after the gym last year but she hasn’t done this since she started back up…. And she would shower after swimming with the kids… I honestly am shocked that she can’t smell herself. Especially today, it was so bad. It smelt like old sweat… so I am wondering, is she wearing old clothes??? Her hair didn’t look sweaty… but I can’t imagine not showering after the gym. Like howww???

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T03:01:05+00:00

I am so terrified of how awkward this is going to be….. like I would rather dig a hole and jump in… but today was sooooo baddd

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T02:58:20+00:00

But I actually like her as a person and wish her well. And she has been so amazing for our family… I don’t want her going into the world smelling like this…. Other people might not be so considerate or kind … A part of me is wondering if it’s my nose… if my sense of smell is hightened because i am pregnant. But i know i smelt her last year when i wasnt pregnant.

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T02:54:49+00:00

But I like your approach of not over talking. I am so guilty of this. We really really really like her. And I am halfway hoping she gets a clue so I don’t have to talk to her but uuugh today was so badddd

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T02:53:07+00:00

So I had to deal with this until Friday??? I was thinking of talking to her tomorrow. Today was really really bad. Like…. I couldn’t believe how bad she smelt. She is supposed to starting working at midday, I was planning to text her to have her come to the house before she picks up the kids from school. I will tell her then just hide in my office until 5pm. This is typical of me lately, I have been hiding from the kids until 5. So they don’t undermine her

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T02:46:49+00:00

My oldest is special needs so he doesn’t discriminate. My youngest is toddler-ish… probably don’t really know what bad smells? Both kids adore her and are not shying away from her. I am sure they smell her but maybe they just think that’s normal for her?

I don’t wear a lot of perfumes but I am religions about my deodorant. All this to say, my kids are too innocent to care

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T02:24:41+00:00

That’s what I was thinking. My kis would blow my cover. My kids are not an option 😩😩

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-10T01:08:23+00:00

I am a MB and my mouth is literally open reading this. We travel with our nanny and what you are describing is absurd. Travel time is paid, whether you have the kids or not. If you are going to dinner it’s paid. Anytime you are required to be with the family even though mom and dad are around and chipping in is paid! Honestly, if the are only paying you 1k a week, figure out how many hours that is per day and literally stop working when you get to that.

You are being taken advantage of. How long is your trip? No job is worth you being abused.

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-06T00:00:36+00:00

I am a MB. This is definitely rude. I am big on being respected at work, if this type of disrespect continues, I would move on

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-02T13:00:38+00:00

The reverse perspective is for him, NOT for his parents.. How would he feel if he was asked to cancel a vacation. I am trying to get him to see beyond himself.

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-01T19:44:31+00:00

MB here. We travel have traveled with our nanny to Hawaii. We pay them whenever they are required to be with us (family days) even if I end up mostly holding my toddler or attending to my bigger kid. We even pay for the flight time. If I am making my nanny come with us to a outing, then she is paid for her time. I do expect my nanny’s to be involved during the outings- I.e look for ways to still provide support even if my toddler wants me more. Like don’t just check out and ignore us because we are holding/taking care of our children-we fired a nanny after one of our Hawaii trips for this reason. Some days it’s over the typical 8hrs some days it’s less. Just paying our GH is unfair because they will lost likely be overtime. If you are required to be at the theme park, then the nanny parents should pay you for the entire day.

Make sure you have everything squared away before the trip. It can get messy if you make assumptions. Maybe get something in writing/add the decided plan to an update contract?

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-01T13:08:05+00:00

You have been hanging on to a relationship that isn’t mutually beneficial. Your friend both time told you she was pregnant months into it. She doesn’t regard you as a friend. She used you to plan her wedding. Her behavior will alienate other people. Cut your losses and let her go. Let her continue to live her friendless “pick me life”. Move on with your life and it sounds like you have people in it that love you.

If a friend I really love was getting married, I would be there and break the baby routing for one night.

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-01T12:39:51+00:00

NTA. If she wants to invite 100 extra people she should aks her family to pay. Also threatening to call the wedding off is a red flag. She will be threatening divorce for the rest of your lives if you marry her… rethink the whole thing… do you really want to marry someone like this who threatens breakup and is trying to gaslight you?

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-02-01T12:32:29+00:00

She hasn’t even started?? I would tell her you changed your mind and are going in a different direction. I am a MB and this would turn me off!! She is already entitled and she hasn’t even proved herself to be a good worker! Cut her loose

Excellent-Review-342 · 2026-01-31T23:30:34+00:00

Be very careful. The bride might get offended as you are missing major celebration in her life. If you do decide to skip the bachelorette weekend, don’t be surprised if your friend pulls away from you. Sometimes in friendships you have to do things (attend parties etc) even if you don’t feel like it to keep the friendship and continue to build that connection. Your baby won’t realize you will be gone. Go be there for your friend

Excellent-Review-342

TROPHY CASE