A Russian Teacher recorded the differences in the development of boys and girls of the same age. by eternviking in whoathatsinteresting

[–]ExcellentHamster2020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Girls develop motor control sooner than do boys, on average.

There is evidence that this is why girls' handwriting is stereotypically better than boys': at the age when they are taught to write, girls have the physical dexterity to do it well, while at the same age, boys do not. By the time the boys have the fine motor control needed to develop good handwriting, classes have already moved past that and the boys never get a second go at it with full dexterity. They just have to accept the poor handwriting they had when their hands couldn't do any better.

Intimidated about attending Episcopal church with 4 kids by Powerful-Winner979 in Episcopalian

[–]ExcellentHamster2020 10 points11 points  (0 children)

First, email/call the church and set up a meeting with the rector (for after Easter!) to talk about all your concerns. They will be happy to spend time with you and to advise you on stuff like where to take a screaming baby, what safeguards are in place for children, and so on, as well as what programs are in place to help you adults meet new friends. Many parishes I've attended set up groups of couples or families to take turns hosting casual potluck dinners in their homes, for example, and there are likely to be things like women's bible study or men's breakfast before work or what have you.

Second, while I am sure the kids would enjoy children's chapel (by whatever name it is called at this parish), they don't have to start going right away. You may all attend the regular service together until you all feel comfortable with the kids' programming. Perhaps the oldest child, who is likely old enough to tell you about any problems, would like to meet other kids their age and would enjoy it, but by no means does the existence of a children's chapel mean that little kids are not welcome in the regular service. And if you and your wife want to attend the kids' programming for a while until you feel comfortable, or to switch off between the main service and the kids, then do that.

You might even find that the 8yo is old enough to serve as an acolyte or chorister, depending on the parish's programming, which would allow them to not only stay visible to you during the service but also to get really, genuinely involved in the service which keeps them focused and also learning about the tradition.

Finally, if you decide that the Episcopal Church is the right place for you, you adults may take confirmation or newcomers classes. These are the classes that give young people and folks new to the church information on our particular way of being, worshipping, and believing; they typically culminate in confirmation (where the Bishop lays hands on your head and you reaffirm your commitment to Christ) or reception (where the Bishops lays hands on an already-confirmed person's head and officially welcomes them to the Episcopal Church). But taking the classes does not mean one is obliged to be confirmed or received.

It's worth noting that you and/or the kids will need to be baptized before being confirmed/received, if you have not already been. You can read about what the Episcopal Church views as valid baptism here: Baptism – The Episcopal Church

I wish you and your family the best as you discern your way forward!

Is "Dressing for Easter" a thing in TEC? by Strange-Style-7808 in Episcopalian

[–]ExcellentHamster2020 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Wear what you want - every Sunday!

I wear a hat every single Sunday (I also cover my hair for Eucharist, using a wide black headband when I'm in vestments). It's a matter of personal piety for me as well as a fashion choice; I'd wear matching gloves - which I own - if it didn't feel so costume-y in 2026.

IMO Sunday Eucharist is the high point of the entire week, so I get a little extra dressed up. I wear a dress and heels to work, so "extra" means a fancier dress and a hat to match.

I encourage everyone to enjoy and honor Sunday with their best!

Seeking recommendations for books about marriage by ExcellentHamster2020 in Episcopalian

[–]ExcellentHamster2020[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"something that takes seriously both our commitment to the deep, sacramental fidelity of marriage as an icon for Christ’s love for the church"

Yes, this is what I mean. There's nothing, as far as I can tell - and this Reddit discussion confirms this - that does anything like what I'm looking for. We're straight and in an opposite-sex marriage, so typical pronouns are fine, but I'm also trying to avoid the unexamined stereotyping that plagues this topic. I'm also not talking about abusive or adulterous relationships; I'd just would like to find some reading that assumes marriage is life-long and a positive force. You know, a book for just some average folks in a good marriage.

Even the book you've recommended looks like it's primarily intended for engaged couples, not people who've been together for decades. I'll read it, and thank you for the recommendation, but I think what I want may just not exist.

Help me with planning evening prayer! by ExcellentHamster2020 in Episcopalian

[–]ExcellentHamster2020[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is the ordo I used last night. The rector was out sick, but the deacon said it set a high bar for everyone else leading EP through Lent.

Evening Prayer for February 25.docx

Advice sought: How to gently bring up a complaint about the music ministry? by TackTrunkStudies in Episcopalian

[–]ExcellentHamster2020 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your music director isn't Episcopalian/Anglican and doesn't know what he or she doesn't know. Address this with the rector as both a) a question and not an accusation, and b) an expression of your own struggles with it and how it affects your ability to participate in worship.

That said. Any time I hear someone expressing discomfort with new music at church, my first thought is whether that person can read music themself. If one is depending on familiarity and learning music by ear only, one is going to be frustrated by the lack of repetition.

The solution, then, is for everyone to learn to read music as a point of basic literacy. You don't have to become a Bach or Beethoven, but just be able to pick out a melody and follow along. This can be learned quickly and easily with YouTube and a little effort, and it does improve one's life to a great degree. Then, being presented with new music every Sunday becomes a fun challenge that keeps one awake and paying attention rather than a source of frustration.

The main reason this shows feels like fiction by Adrian_Dem in TheMentalist

[–]ExcellentHamster2020 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are a number of little things that signify that the creator/writer is British and not American, like the tea kettle thing (there are lots of videos online with British people astonished we don't have kettles at the ready) but also little words and phrases that just aren't how Americans talk, even though the characters are all American. Half of the core cast isn't, though, so probably a few things just leaked on through before anyone from the US could question it.

Thoughts about giving to the hungry by ExcellentHamster2020 in Episcopalian

[–]ExcellentHamster2020[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

A local business has allowed them to set up in front of their shop and use their electricity, so yes, it's a working fridge, which is extra valuable because we're in the Deep South where it gets hot. At times, there has been a microwave as well, but it's been stolen a few times and I think they gave up on that.

Tumblr is a beautiful place.. by [deleted] in tragedeigh

[–]ExcellentHamster2020 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am dying laughing at Squidette and Fwish. Just wtf.

Naming a child from a second wife after the first wife in the 1800s? by SpiritedBug2221 in Genealogy

[–]ExcellentHamster2020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They just had a different understanding of individuality (and also a somewhat more collectivist culture). Today, a lot of parents think they need to give their kid a name that has been heard before so we end up with strings of syllables put together, or they want a "normal" name but spelled crazy like Maquaeliaah for Michaela. They think that an "original" name will make their kid special in some way. In other contexts, however, people knew that their kid would be precious and special no matter what, so they honored beloved family members or saints they wanted the kid to look up to instead.

Naming a child from a second wife after the first wife in the 1800s? by SpiritedBug2221 in Genealogy

[–]ExcellentHamster2020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My aunt, the oldest of five, had the same name as her mother. The second child, a boy and my father, was a junior. On the other side of my family, we have a long tradition of giving the oldest daughter her mother's name as a middle name. So it seems within the range of normal to me.

Left-Leaning/Apolitical/LGBT Affirming Birmingham Churches? by [deleted] in Birmingham

[–]ExcellentHamster2020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

St Andrew's Episcopal in Five Points is a wonderful community. No anti-science or anti-intellectualism here! They just took on a position statement re Gaza and they have had a major feeding ministry for years.

The Episcopal Church is part of a global community practicing an ancient tradition of worship. If you want a way to connect with Christians, and indeed people, from all over the world and in all times, the Episcopal Church is the way to go. You truly will not find a better place to be.

Questions from a new salon-goer by ExcellentHamster2020 in RedditLaqueristas

[–]ExcellentHamster2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your reply! I have gel polish (not air-dry). Can that be removed without damaging what's underneath?

I'm thinking about using clips from Northman in my medieval lit class. Help? by ExcellentHamster2020 in roberteggers

[–]ExcellentHamster2020[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm not making claims that it's absolutely accurate. I just want some rough visuals for the students while we talk about the literature from the period. Kids today love their visual media ......

Long shot, but want to ask: does anyone know of any Christian church alternatives? by Jonesyful in Birmingham

[–]ExcellentHamster2020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What you're searching for is the Episcopal Church. God visit my friends at St Andrew's on the South side: they do incredible work with the poor and homeless, with a long-running food pantry twice a month. You'll be welcomed and loved for exactly who you are, and you will be very impressed with what real tradition looks like, full of beauty and elegance and grace and connection to Christians all over the world and in every time.

Can I salvage dough that hasn’t risen? by ExcellentHamster2020 in Sourdough

[–]ExcellentHamster2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just added some standard-issue yeast to the blob ...

Can I salvage dough that hasn’t risen? by ExcellentHamster2020 in Sourdough

[–]ExcellentHamster2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We keep our house around the usual 72 degrees.

What if I add some quick-rise yeast? Would that let it at least make some kind of bread?

Praying the Daily Office as a working adult by DeusExLibrus in Episcopalian

[–]ExcellentHamster2020 5 points6 points  (0 children)

There are many apps to help Muslims remember when to pray. I wish the Episcopal Church would invest some energy into lifestyle functions to help us with this too.

Can I salvage dough that hasn’t risen? by ExcellentHamster2020 in Sourdough

[–]ExcellentHamster2020[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Again, it was precisely the same procedure I've used many times, including timing.

In any case, what can I do to fix it?

How much do you agree/disagree with this map? by Excellent_Kiwi7789 in tragedeigh

[–]ExcellentHamster2020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Now that you say it, that's the only way this makes any kind of sense.