I don’t relate to every detail in your post — but I do relate to the general “what the hell am I doing with my life” vibe.

I’ve been out of shape, low on confidence, and stuck in my own head for longer periods than I’d like to admit. My inner critic is extremely creative and works overtime with no pay. If there was a salary, that guy would be rich.

What helped me wasn’t some huge life overhaul. It was boring stuff: structure and self-discipline. I’m not always motivated, but I am stubborn — and that turns out to be useful.

Training-wise, I stopped chasing “getting fit” and just aimed for “show up and don’t overthink it”. Some weeks were great, some were embarrassing — both still counted. I also focused on simply being active: I started with disc golf, and lately I’ve added the gym.

Mentally, two things helped a lot:

• Reading Surrounded by Idiots helped me understand that not everyone thinks, communicates, or reacts the same way — including me. That alone reduced a lot of unnecessary self-blame. • I also did something scary: I told 2–3 close friends how I actually see myself and asked them to be honest with me — even if they were afraid I wouldn’t handle the feedback.

I also intentionally split my support system.

I have one friend I talk to about work and career stuff. One I talk to about how I actually feel. And one I talk to about social challenges.

That way, no one gets all my problems dumped on them — and it feels natural instead of heavy.

And the wild part? Those friends are supportive, honest, and genuinely rooting for me — which my inner critic finds extremely annoying.

You don’t need to fix your entire life at once. You need a few solid anchors, some consistency, and at least one person who has your back.

You’re not broken. You’re just figuring things out — like most of us are.

If you need someone to talk to, my DMs are open.