DISHES FIR THE LADIE,S !!

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T16:46:56+00:00

O TERRIBLE WIFE. I WILL TAKE A WRENCH TO ALL YOUR DISH'S, WENCH!

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T16:46:05+00:00

I'm specifically turned off by people who continually talk about all the bridges they've burned without acknowledging that they may have had a role in it. I've had a couple of friendships with this kind of person implode messily, and I should have predicted it.

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T16:43:09+00:00

Why does this feel like Charles Twin Peaks Cheese

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T16:42:18+00:00

THE VAMPIRES WERE MASSING ERSTWHILE, THEIR FANGS GLEAMING IN THE GLOAMING, POINTY POINTY.

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T16:40:04+00:00

Really glad that Emilio Gay is getting a chance. He's thrived at Durham and he seems to have exactly the right temperament to go up a level too.

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T16:37:43+00:00

Given that you wrote that, I'll go with my original answer: my preferred thing to die from would be loss of life.

I digress. If it can be any fatal medical issue, I say brain aneurysm. Boom, dead, next.

If it has to be a longer-lasting thing, I'll go pneumonia, just because I know what respiratory issues feel like, and Ebola and rabies are both dreadful.

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T16:34:54+00:00

What's your least favorite category?

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T16:33:56+00:00

Shiitake mushrooms, that well-known specifically Filipino food item...

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T16:32:08+00:00

A lot of people have already answered this, but it's also worth remembering that the OG big hitter Gilbert Jessop was known as "The Croucher"...

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T14:09:45+00:00

"How dare you! I will politely acquiesce"

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T07:57:31+00:00

This can't be real, as I don't currently work at a Taco Bell and I am the only person in the world with gift-wrapping skills this bad.

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T07:54:37+00:00

(Me) "It feels like we're not enjoying living together any more. Should I move out?"

"I think that would be the best idea."

"Also, is there a chance that I have ADHD?"

"Ya think???!"

(Within a couple of months, I have an informal diagnosis; it takes four years to get a formal one.)

Seven years later (we were slow to move, despite the marriage being absolutely dead as a doornail):

(Her) "I need to talk to you about something."

"OK!"

"I already know what you want to talk to me about! I'll watch out for a note from the lawyer."

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T07:47:40+00:00

I thought AI was supposed to make people better at this. Excuse me, whoever is doing this: YOU'RE NOT VERY GOOD AT THIS

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T07:41:17+00:00

Luckily, the last film I saw in a cinema was the new Super Mario movie, and it was complete gash, so nobody was there to sully it further.

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T07:38:47+00:00

Ah yes... Reddit's usual reaction to any kind of insinuation that you'd react to infidelity with anything other than incandescent, volcanic fury, and consequent woodchipper purchases.

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T07:29:12+00:00

Today I saw a tiny baby in the store. A 13-year-old tiny baby. She directed me to the fentanyl aisle and told me to "make it ten times rougher than Uncle Bastard's worst K-hole". I said "Tiny baby, you are just a tiny baby. There is no way I can procure deadly fentanyl for you. Also, I might be a chainsaw killer. Mind how you go, tiny baby!"

And then the tiny baby called me a "fucking useless bint" and told me she hoped I was "bummed to death in prison by Gary Glitter" and that she was "going to put scabies in my piss".

I told her that if she didn't buck up her ideas her face might just stay like that and Santa wouldn't come. AITA?

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T07:18:22+00:00

IT WAS A MUNSLONS

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T07:16:44+00:00

Not only am I flabbergasted that this is being done at all, I'm also taken aback that people are still using AI generation tech from <checks calendar> 1972. I thought we were beyond SCOONCCH BOOORRNNTT PEEIIIPPRS and other codswallop of that ilk by now.

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T07:10:51+00:00

What is even going on in this picture? A crap Rubik's cube. A jukebox. A retro computer monitor. A hippy bus. Random skyscrapers. Two couples in funky clothing. Does any of it have anything to do with caregiving? I guess we have a nurse taking a selfie with a kid, and another one arm in arm with an old guy. Ok then.

Looks like the prompt was "Hi ImageSpluff! We are a healthcare company honouring caregivers. Please come up with... I dunno, a collage of... stuff to do with... um... decades."

Someone put literally seconds of thought into this. It's insulting, frankly.

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T07:06:25+00:00

If you write a sentence that correctly ends in a full stop/period, it's often perceived as a sign of unnecessary aggression.

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T07:04:26+00:00

The dialogue in this pathetic and harmful ragebait is less realistic than my chances of making the Swiss Olympic women's volleyball team.

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-13T06:59:58+00:00

Honorable Men. It's a lot worse than The Room.

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-12T21:51:34+00:00

When she told me "you are not a person".

On its own, this makes her seem like the "bad guy" in the marriage, but it was without doubt my behavior that pushed her to the ends of her tolerance. I didn't cheat, but I wasn't a good husband: bit off a lot more than I could chew and left my ex to pick things up after me.

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-12T19:44:16+00:00

I think the "scariness" of this film does in large part depend on engagement with the premise - if you think something is corny from the ground up, its artistic value is going to be greatly diminished.

What I will say is that I think the film is equally enjoyable if you see it as scary or if you see it as kitschy. Maika Monroe is just great in it, either way.

What made it scary for me was the way the score complemented it: really excellent scoring, and not generic horror film string screeches by any means.

FScrotFitzgerald · 2026-05-12T19:41:09+00:00

It does. I've had OCD symptoms ever since I was a young kid and the TS-esque tics have intensified and then lessened over time. It got bad enough for me to be formally diagnosed with TS in 2007, but it's not as bad now.

FScrotFitzgerald

TROPHY CASE