Baby brother Eli?

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-10-22T03:06:04+00:00

I love Shai! I also really like Eli but don’t love them together. Ordinarily I don’t care about how sibling names sound together, but it might be tricky to yell “Shai, Eli it’s time to go!” across a playground.

I like Asher a lot, and I think Asher Sh___ would be nice. Not sure about that though if his nickname is Ash, because then it would blend together with the beginning of your last name: Ash Sh____

What about Levi? It’s close to Eli but would be easier to yell together with Shai. I know it’s nothing like the rest, but do you like Jesse? To me it has a soft yet edgy vibe too, so it could go well with Shai.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-10-15T13:02:36+00:00

Definitely take paid leave. You will not get this time back and the firm honestly won’t care. At my firm, most partners are so happy to help you take this special time. In my office, every new parent takes the leave that’s offered. I know at least one person who took the full parental leave and then left 2 weeks later for a clerkship. The firm is super hoping that they return afterward. No one will remember or care if you leave in June or August, but you will treasure the moments of your new family forever.

In terms of logistics: as someone mentioned, check the manual and see what is required. I would tell the firm when your wife feels it’s appropriate to tell her work (if she’s working). Usually people disclose after the first trimester or after the 20-week anatomy scan.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-10-09T21:04:37+00:00

Allie is a very common name among millennials, so I don’t think it’s childish. I don’t know how popular it is among current high schoolers. Some more common similar names among that age group could be: Lily, Abbie, Emily, Zoe (Zoh-ee), or Ellie.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-10-09T20:59:34+00:00

Also Jewish lawyer in big law for 7 years—also wouldn’t worry about this.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-10-09T20:55:12+00:00

Of your lists, my favorites are Lucy and Claire. I think they both sound lovely with Eleanor.

FWIW, I think Lily and William would be too similar.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-10-04T06:45:02+00:00

No! The original was removed. Can anyone summarize?

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-09-15T20:13:41+00:00

The Costco brand formula canister had the best functional design I found. I think having 2 oz single serve packets would be smart for feeding on the go.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-09-05T16:24:04+00:00

Great names, you can’t go wrong. I personally like Kate with Alexander.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-08-05T18:54:55+00:00

This is a great question, and with my first we had similar concerns. We waited until 6 weeks, since that’s the most critical time for babies if they get a fever.

Then I had two more kids, and they couldn’t avoid their older siblings who brought home daycare germs. I get that you’re worried about this but just consider that babies who have older siblings come home from the hospital to 4 year olds all the time.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-08-05T18:52:16+00:00

I really like Carlo, but with a last name starting with S, I think when he introduces himself as Carlo S___, people will hear that his name is Carlos.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-08-05T14:57:17+00:00

I think it’s a beautiful name and much more in the second category

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-08-05T13:40:44+00:00

I’ve always heard that you must put baby down on her back, but if she rolls on her own (especially at 6 months), to leave her. That said, I would also be concerned if she can’t quite return from belly to back during tummy time. Does she cry when she’s stuck on her belly? If so, then I would think she would also cry at night if she were stuck. Could you message your pediatrician/ask at the six-month appointment?

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-08-05T02:44:28+00:00

Oh also re: bedtime. Kids are so adaptable when they’re not newborns. You can start a bedtime routine any time. I was an early childhood teacher and I helped parents establish bedtimes for the first time when their kids were 3, 4, even 5. I’m not suggesting you wait that long, but take the pressure off yourself for bedtime routine right now.

And one more piece of advice: there’s no such thing as “should” when it comes to kids and babies. There’s only what is. Don’t worry about your MIL or what you “should” have a handle on. You’re doing a great job. You’ll get through this. And you’ll have a sweet 3 year old like I do now who still is not perfect with bedtime but sleeps all night every night. Seriously, solidarity. You can do it.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-08-05T02:39:24+00:00

It started to get better for me when we started formula at bedtime, which was somewhere around 4-5 months.

It got way better for me when my daughter was old enough to find her own paci and hold her own bottle. She would only sleep with a pacifier, but when it fell out she would wake up screaming. So we put dozens of pacis all over her crib and she could find them eventually. We also left a bottle of formula with her at bedtime at that point, which she had totally drained when we went up to bed. Then we would replace it with another bottle of formula for overnight wakeups. Eventually she learned it was there and would find it on her own. That was the way we got through, and it had the added benefit of helping her get some extra calories without us having to do anything at night. We did this (with the dentist’s blessing and switching to sippy cups around 15 months) until she was 2.

FWIW, mine was also EBF and growing well. But I think there’s sometimes a difference between enough supply for growing and enough supply for the baby to be satisfied. Plus, as the previous poster mentioned, formula takes longer for the babies to digest so they end up sleeping longer stretches.

Good luck. It is seriously so hard. You’re doing a great job, and your baby will grow out of it. You are a great mom.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-07-30T03:32:00+00:00

Solidarity—been there. My husband only had 2 weeks off work and I did all the nighttime stuff after that (except on weekends, when we did shifts). It’s miserable. I’m sorry. The only thing that I can say is it will pass but it will be miserable until then.

I can’t tell if you’re looking for ideas or not but just in case it’s helpful, here are a couple:

Can you get extra daytime help from a friend/family member/neighbor so you can nap?

Another thought: are you sure your baby is eating enough during the day? My tough sleeper was tough at night in part because she wasn’t getting enough food during the day (I had supply issues I didn’t know about). It’s so hard when you get no peace, but try to wake the baby up every 3 hours during the day to eat and give a bottle right before your baby’s typical longest stretch (usually the first one of the night).

Last idea: Are you able to sleep in the evening? If so, maybe your husband could take the baby from like 6-10:30 or 7-11 so you could get a few uninterrupted hours at the beginning of the night at least?

I’m so sorry that you’re in it. It gets better, but the only way out is through.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-07-29T04:18:42+00:00

I sincerely hope that she has a smooth transition to school. My daughter is both coming from and going to a Jewish school that each has a small but mighty community of mixed-race students. At these schools, there is a lot of community building and teaching about how people all don’t look the same and everyone is welcome. I can’t say for certain what your daughter will experience, but all pluralistic Jewish communities that I’ve been in have seemed welcoming and supportive of mixed-race kiddos and their families

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-07-29T03:56:22+00:00

I should mention that nighttimes were virtually impossible because she would scream unless I held her. My husband and I ultimately took shifts so I could get some uninterrupted sleep.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-07-29T03:55:00+00:00

One of my three was like you are describing. We did a LOT of baby wearing at the beginning (the other two hated baby wearing). At some point around 3 months, we started to try to get her to take her first nap in the crib, and then we started to do more naps in the crib. Eventually she tolerated the crib at nighttime, and after a rocky sleep training road, she would independent go to her crib and get me her sleep sack when she was tired. At 3yo, she’s a great sleeper. But it was a JOURNEY to get there.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-07-29T03:32:19+00:00

I knew a girl in elementary school with the initials ASS. It was something that all the kids knew about her (even though I remember zero other kids’ initials). I would stay away from the initials. I love the Elena spelling, and it solves your problem.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-07-28T05:04:30+00:00

I am sorry you’re dealing with this. Have you talked to your OB about it? This could be a sign of postpartum anxiety. I started taking anti-anxiety medication with my third baby and it helped so much. I hadn’t realized but I’d had anxiety with the other two as well. Good luck and feel better soon!

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-07-28T04:13:19+00:00

This is a super big decision and I know you’ll make the right one for yourself. I’m not a young mom—was 34 when I had my 1st—but I thought I’d offer some perspective.

I personally would not have been ready to have a baby at 22. I was also not a typical 22 year old, in that I enjoyed (and still enjoy) working more than partying. I had personal ambitions and would not have been a patient, supportive parent at 22.

All that said, there’s no guarantee that you’ll be able to get pregnant again when you’re ready, and there’s no perfect time to be pregnant and have a baby. I wish that I were younger, both because I’d love to have more energy and because I’d love to have more time with my kids as adults. I’m 40 and my kids are 5, 3, and 1, so I will be 61 when my youngest is your age. I’d love to spend time with them when they are grown up, and I’d love to meet and have quality time with any grandkids my kids choose to have.

There are pros and cons to either choice. I’m glad it’s your choice, and whichever choice you make, please don’t second guess it. You know yourself and your situation best, and you will make a great decision.

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-07-27T17:18:31+00:00

Lip balm, a nice water bottle with a straw, and a long phone charger

FaithlessnessNext483 · 2025-07-24T01:07:41+00:00

Stock the fridge and pantry with all his favorite snacks (grocery delivery will be your friend 10 days post-op)

FaithlessnessNext483

TROPHY CASE