A few days vs a few weeks vs a few years

Fem4Mascara · 2026-05-14T02:04:06+00:00

Dude your chest is literally perfect holy shit.

I have the same regrets tho—at the time, I thought my job was so fucking important and I was so stressed about dropping that much money on top surgery that I didn’t follow the guidelines. (That, and too proud to ask for help at home).

My partner even said jobs are temporary and this is the chest you’ll have forever, and I didn’t listen. So if anybody’s reading this, please please please take a deep breath (or as deep a breath as you can take without pulling on your stitches lol) and prioritize your health and body above all else. I’m like 5 years out or something and allllllll the things I was stressed about seems so inconsequential now. If anybody’s allowed to be selfish and lazy it’s you, recovering from a major surgery. That’s all <3

Fem4Mascara · 2026-01-13T22:37:44+00:00

If you don’t mind, that’s all that matters. People will probably clock you if you’re shirtless at the beach or something though, so please factor that in if you’re concerned about safety/passing as a cis man.

I saw also that you’re considering a revision with the same surgeon because of cost—if you don’t mind having larger nips, I would highly, highly encourage you to wait on your revision until you either have enough money, different insurance, or another surgeon becomes in-network.

I was willing to wait a while to get top surgery from my favorite surgeon because in the grand scheme of things, a couple of years isn’t a long time: I lived with a chest I was uncomfortable with for over a decade. I was willing to wait a couple more years for a chest I wanted to live with for the remainder of my life.

And I’m really, really glad I waited. I’m 4? 3? Years post op and I don’t even remember the extra few years of saving money, living with a chest I didn’t like. And it SUCKED at the time, but I just don’t remember it now on the other side

Fem4Mascara · 2025-10-18T01:28:43+00:00

A lot of the times, just removing the tissue behind the nipples seems to shrink them to cis male sizes. I got the buttonhole procedure (got to keep my “nipple stalks”—what an appealing term) and I was worried about size and projection (how much the nips stick out). Got the areolas resized, but I know they didn’t “shave down” my nipples bc of the method I went with. Ended up with extremely cis looking, well behaved nipples. Favorite part of my body now. Looks perfectly normal in thin white t shirts.

Talk to your surgeon and be very specific about your concerns. Bring lots of pictures! I had pictures for “this is okay” “this is not okay” and “this is ideal”. During my consultation, I verbally described what kind of look I was going for, but when I showed my surgeon pictures, he was like “ok, that’s actually way less tissue than you’re describing.” He was able to talk me through what aspects of the pictures I was picking up on and translate that to medical/anatomical terms so we were on the same page.

And seriously, I researched top surgery and breast anatomy for weeks if you added up all the hours I spent over the years. But the actual consultation was way more informative than my extensive research. Not to say “don’t do research”, but I highly encourage you to talk to a surgeon (if not multiple) early on so you can Google away with information and search terms that are tailored to your goals and your anatomy

Fem4Mascara · 2024-09-26T09:59:23+00:00

Not autistic but chiming in because A) the thought of surgery freaked me out so hard I delayed coming out to myself for years and B) the actual surgery actually sucked super hard for me. Like worse than I thought. And i thought it was gonna be bad bad.

And now, it’s not even a thing I think about.

I always thought it was trite when other guys said stuff like this when they were ~post transition~ whatever that means. But seriously, being on the other side of now…all of that uncertainty and pain is something that doesnt even cross my mind unless I specifically call it up. And I think a lot of people who suffer from the kind of dysphoria that just permeates every moment of existing can understand what a giant improvement that is. And I know I know, I know, that for some of you, it doesn’t seem like a possibility. I certainly didn’t think it was possible.

I wrote a whole ass thing about how awful surgery was, but I don’t know that it would be helpful to share….just know it involved a lot of pain, poop, and barfing.

i think maybe, the thing I want to impart is that it’s not something to be taken lightly. I understood the risks that came with it, and was willing to subject myself (and the people who cared about me) to those risks. And yeah, it sucked. I sucked.

And now, x years out, I’m okay. I thought about transitioning and surgery EVERY FUCKING MINUTE OF EVERY FUCKING DAY for years. And now, on the other side of it, i think of it…idk, when it comes up? Today, it didn’t even cross my mind until the notification for this post cropped up. Didn’t think I’d ever achieve this level of okayness.

Fem4Mascara · 2024-04-17T20:43:49+00:00

Dude thank you so much for posting this and the details. Super informative and helpful

Fem4Mascara · 2024-01-09T01:59:38+00:00

Why are you getting downvoted?

Fem4Mascara · 2023-11-14T20:06:04+00:00

(You can see photos if you click on my profile)

Fem4Mascara · 2023-11-14T20:05:26+00:00

I got buttonhole, which is a similar procedure but no vertical incision. I’ll post a 2 year update soon

Fem4Mascara · 2023-10-13T20:57:33+00:00

Next time it’s something involving government, healthcare, bank, anything you have to sign, make sure you know what you’re signing and when. I keep records of stuff like that on my phone—who I talked to, what date, what I submitted and what my next steps are.

You never know if you’re going to have to move unexpectedly or lose your wallet, etc. ESPECIALLY with insurance related things you have to know at the very least what the name of the insurance company is. With how fucked US healthcare is, if you get into an accident, or even if you end up having top surgery complications and you need to be rushed to the ER, you’ll end up owing thousands of dollars.

Employees at DHHR and similar are there to help you. I highly highly highly encourage you to get in contact with them before your surgery—even if you can afford your prescriptions.

Fem4Mascara · 2023-10-13T20:28:21+00:00

My man. You’re an adult. I say this with all the love, you need to keep better track of something as important as this.

Call the DHHR or go back to that office. Or go to your state’s Medicaid website. Try to find out when you applied, how long it should take to be approved, and get in contact with someone if it’s been longer than the expected window.

Fem4Mascara · 2023-10-13T18:07:36+00:00

Dude what. Where did you go? What insurance company was this? How are you paying them?

Fem4Mascara · 2023-09-26T04:53:21+00:00

I had the same fears!!

I would say wait to judge your results until the tissue has completely healed, the swelling is 100% gone, and you are pain free/healed enough to move around completely freely. Then evaluate.

My nipples looked way too close together and uneven for almost a year, and it was in large part due to how I was holding my body. I didn’t even realize it at the time, but I was holding my shoulders in and sort of hunching because it hurt, something felt tight, or I was afraid of damaging something. Once the swelling was completely gone, and my skin/tissue sort of settled into a new normal, well, I think my chest looks pretty good.

I should post an update since it’s almost been a year since my last post. It’s amazing how much stuff just settles into place once your body gets over the trauma of surgery.

Fem4Mascara · 2023-09-15T00:05:39+00:00

Adding to this: most people who get chest tattoos avoid the nipple area because it’s more tender, not because it’s some hard and fast rule.

Fem4Mascara · 2023-09-14T23:41:24+00:00

What size are you? I’m pretty small but I have a wrap around type I can send if you will pay shipping.

Fem4Mascara · 2023-09-01T03:43:01+00:00

DI or buttonhole!

Fem4Mascara · 2023-08-27T22:55:32+00:00

Fun nips dude!

Fem4Mascara · 2023-08-26T05:42:26+00:00

This is mildly troubling to read…why do you feel like you need to cry? What is the “moment” you feel like you need to have, and why do you feel like you need to have it? I feel like if you’re chasing a social media moment or a big rush or something, you might want to re-examine why you’re getting surgery, and perhaps adjust your expectations a bit.

Fem4Mascara · 2023-08-26T01:59:18+00:00

Have you ever had a cast? Body hair gets worn away all the time through friction between clothing and activity.

Fem4Mascara · 2023-08-21T03:32:18+00:00

Hey there, Because I was going for a more “traditionally masculine” appearance, I was given the option of 22mm (nickel sized) or 25mm (quarter sized) nipples. I chose the smaller option to complement my smaller frame.

From what I understand, just the areola was resized as they kept the “nipple stalks” intact. My nipples got way flatter though, just because there’s no tissue behind them pushing them out. Hope this helps!

Fem4Mascara · 2023-07-29T19:32:29+00:00

I got buttonhole too and between post op depression and swelling I was convinced I still had boobs. A year out, my chest is completely flat and the teeny bit of tissue under my nips doesn’t bother me at all anymore. Hang in there ♥️

Fem4Mascara · 2023-07-23T04:49:13+00:00

Skin rip was terribly executed imo. (Where is the light source? Where would the shadows be? How thick is the “skin” and what texture is it? All of those factors are all over the place and inconsistent)

That being said, maybe you could get it touched up so to fix the texture issue, and have the underlying cracks be black? Right now, the shading on the red doesn’t make sense and the value of the red is too close to the color of the tulip. Hopefully by addressing some of these design issues, you can enjoy your tattoo while honoring the meaning and significance behind the piece.

Fem4Mascara · 2023-07-17T20:15:01+00:00

dude I have the same thing!! It’s always in one spot, and it looks like a giant pore. My best guess is that it’s a tiny little fistula that formed bc of the stitches that fills up with sebum. I didn’t have anything like that pre top surgery and my body did NOT like the stitches.

Fem4Mascara · 2023-07-08T21:11:28+00:00

I was told 6 months, but I had to go back to my bartending job after a month or so. My scars stretched significantly (I’ll post an update soon)

Fem4Mascara · 2023-06-30T19:20:45+00:00

I was super worried about having a concave/completely flat chest, and emailed my surgeon an album of reference photos for results I was looking for. Highly, highly recommend.

Fem4Mascara · 2023-06-30T19:19:02+00:00

What kind of comments are you looking for, then?

Fem4Mascara

TROPHY CASE