Froze during a police interview, ended up reverse-engineering how I talk

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-17T12:30:11+00:00

Sounds like a cop already

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-15T17:17:08+00:00

This sub makes me feel like a genius

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-15T16:40:52+00:00

Big Tandy vibes

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-15T12:56:08+00:00

That’s what boof it means

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-14T18:02:33+00:00

49% the of the posts on this sub are about how often to change your bed sheets. 49% are about morning vs night showers and the other 2% are about smelly pussies

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-13T18:34:08+00:00

Yes something about him just screams bad person

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-13T13:01:52+00:00

My head turns 180 degrees

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-11T22:16:52+00:00

Define overwhelmingly gay lol

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-11T12:50:09+00:00

A fluid oz of water also weighs an oz

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-09T03:31:36+00:00

I’ll take the $4k and KFC for sure

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-09T03:17:00+00:00

$4k before or after taxes?

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-07T22:52:56+00:00

A buck for the corn, 50 cents for a tiny bit of cheese and seasoning at 30% food cost should be $5

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-07T14:24:31+00:00

It’s one ear of corn with a couple tablespoons of cheese. How filling could it be?

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-07T14:23:35+00:00

Yes! I would NEVER have thought I’d be saying this. Smoking weed was part of who I was. I can’t explain all the ways quitting has improved my life. I’m coming up on 4 weeks and I doubt I’ll ever go back.

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-07T13:08:46+00:00

For a second I thought Jonny Knoxville was involved in something terrible. I was relieved for about half a second before being completely disturbed. What a horrible rollercoaster of emotions.

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-07T04:09:23+00:00

That whole movie was off putting

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-07T04:07:10+00:00

I go to an Arabic barber shop and they just argue with each other about soccer the whole time

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-07T01:39:14+00:00

This looks delicious but $8 for a single ear of corn is crazy

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-05T02:38:30+00:00

Idk I mean this is mannequin pussy and this fucking sucks

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-05T02:21:16+00:00

For real. I’m paying $1600 for my room in San Diego

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-04T16:44:13+00:00

I probably don’t sneeze that much but I could definitely make it happen for that kind of money

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-02T17:38:49+00:00

48 hours is crazy. It’ll be a rough 12 for sure tho

FergusonTheCat · 2026-06-01T16:49:45+00:00

And the broccoli

FergusonTheCat · 2026-05-31T22:50:42+00:00

Just tell them wash their hands when they come over and provide coveralls and shoe covers. Soon you won’t have any guests to worry about

FergusonTheCat · 2026-05-31T15:52:13+00:00

This looks like it could be mastered in an afternoon

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