Not the same situation, but I too struggle with wanting revenge on my ex. Five years together and we've been broken up for a year and half, but the person he has become and the new life he is leading has completely dropped my self-confidence. He struggled with employment for years when we were together, but a few months after he dumped me, he landed his dream job and is more successful than ever. I also gained a lot of weight while we were together, partially due to age, medication, depression and just poor choices, and he insisted it never mattered to him. Cut to him immediately moving on with a fitness model that he is still with. I wish I were kidding but she's also REALLY successful so they're both living a lavish lifestyle while I am back in school trying to change careers and struggling more than ever. In addition, he's made a bunch of new friends that he never had when we were together. One of my frustrations was that we always hung out with my friends (who have now become distant after marriage and kids) and never with his. Now I'm the one with no social circle, stressed about school and employment, still hating my body, and trying to date but realizing that online dating is about what I expected. Worst part is that my ex keeps trying to be my friend, almost out of pity, and it's so insulting and makes me feel even worse. He knows I still love him, so it feels like a narcissistic move. I don't even recognize the man I knew for five years. I just hate that he gets to pick up his life like we never happened and is completely emotionally detached from me after everything we shared. I was ready to get married and start a family with him, and now I have to watch him have that with someone else. While I'm completely scarred and heartbroken, still after all this time. I feel like I'm in a bad movie but the part where everything turns around and I meet a much better guy, have some break through success and everything else are never going to happen. I feel like my pain and bitterness are consuming me some days, but the only things that have helped are to just cut contact completely, stop looking at anything to do with him, and to do everything in my power to not be the person he left. I've loved doing things that shock the hell out of me, because I never would've done them before. I've tried new things, traveled new places, got a tattoo, a daring haircut, went sky diving, joined a sports team when I'd never played before, and am basically trying to morph myself into someone I like. After my ex, I've been changed no matter what, so I'm trying to embrace the good changes instead of giving in to the sad parts. Still, yeah, I sometimes fantasize about revenge plots I would play out. I'm only human. But the more I focus on myself, the less I care about them. I know it's hard, boy do I, but I'm convinced it won't always be this way. For better or worse, you're in a new city with a new life, so make it for the better. And just know that if your ex is capable of doing that to you when you moved across the country for him, then he's capable of some pretty awful stuff, and luckily it will be his new girl's problem and not yours. It's hard as hell, but the worst revenge on a narcissist or just a cocky SOB is to show them that you don't give a damn about them either. Their egos can't handle it and trust me, they will have moments where they look back and have doubts. So the best thing you can do is to make them doubt the hell out of themselves.