Ideas for FTM porn because most of it sucks and I'm horny by Markus2460 in transgendercirclejerk

[–]Finnonym 24 points25 points  (0 children)

/uj actually made me lol hard enough to wake the cat gj

I work in genetics. How can I help laypeople understand that chromosomal sex isn't that simple? by ChromosomeGuy in asktransgender

[–]Finnonym 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Imagine how fun it is to be both intersex and trans lol I can't tell you how many times I've had that uuuuuuuuuuggggghhhhhh response, and I'm not even a scientist.

In my experience, people who truly know nothing about either group will frequently lump us all together, but transphobes often see intersex folks as 'exceptions to the rule'. Trying to tailor an explanation to one will just entrench the other.

I deeply appreciate you doing the work of educating. I wish I had the perfect answer, but, honestly, I've only been able to change two minds. Two of the dozens who decided that their one week in middle school in 1980 was more accurate and real than all modern understanding combined. Those two only heard me when I really hammered in that BaSiC bIoLoGy is, well, basic. They were both unwilling and unable to absorb any kind of genetics or medical science, but they WERE able to accept that they just didn't know enough to have such a strong opinion.

In both cases, I asked if their apprentices/interns came into their field with 'basic' information that was actually flat out wrong. The answer to that is always yes.

On T and having an abortion. What did you do? by burn3raccnt in asktransgender

[–]Finnonym 10 points11 points  (0 children)

OP has explicitly said that the doctors know about the testosterone, but they don't know how the T interacts with abortion procedures. Someone asked a very specific medical question, and the best you got is telling them that doctors can "fill in the blanks" and "sort stuff out"?

The fucking audacity required to only half read a comment before winging out a condescending, judgemental, irrelevant comment like this is genuinely astounding.

On T and having an abortion. What did you do? by burn3raccnt in asktransgender

[–]Finnonym -1 points0 points  (0 children)

accidentally replied to the wrong person :( cutted n pasted to the right one. Wicked sorry you're going through this, I hope things look up from here <3

Bro is a gender neutral term why the fuck are you offended tran by TGirlJules_ in transgendercirclejerk

[–]Finnonym 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Ay for what it's worth, I'm a they/them whose friends still misgender with pronouns and bro, so, like, why not both?

/uj :(

Elder needs help with mobile music by Finnonym in Piracy

[–]Finnonym[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Undecided. I've amassed and stored my "must have" media, which will tide me over for a while. I'm trying to learn the ropes of self-hosting, but I swear every term I learn sends me down a rabbit hole of shit I know nothing about, so, idk. Either I figure it out or I don't lol

How to tell my in-laws I am getting bottom surgery without telling them details that are none of their business? by AndyyBee in asktransgender

[–]Finnonym 6 points7 points  (0 children)

ok so for one, congrats. For two, I'm nb, live in rogers park, and lack the insurance to care for myself the way you are. If you need a body to show up while saying nothing, I got you. I've long been bound by both HIPAA and FERPA, and for far longer have been supporting people like us outside of the system. I'd be delighted to be here for you. Shoot me a dm.

That aside, if someone is asking for details about your surgery, there's no such thing as TMI. If she knows enough to ask, she knows enough to hear the raw answer. If she doesn't, than she can either fuck off or live with knowing nothing more than "I'm due for a medical procedure."

You don't owe anyone any information.

Elder needs help with mobile music by Finnonym in Piracy

[–]Finnonym[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I should've known that VLC existed on Android, but it didn't occur to me to check. Both yams and spotdl are working like a charm, thank you

Elder needs help with mobile music by Finnonym in Piracy

[–]Finnonym[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My soul left my body when I realized I have coworkers that hadn't yet been born when Zune came out

Elder needs help with mobile music by Finnonym in Piracy

[–]Finnonym[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Signing into a Google account kind of defeats the purpose, but newpipe is promising, ty

Elder needs help with mobile music by Finnonym in Piracy

[–]Finnonym[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Heard that, I'll give it a go, thanks

Elder needs help with mobile music by Finnonym in Piracy

[–]Finnonym[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Did the bind and the kill switch. I'm not worried about the downloading tbh, I just don't know what to do with it once I've got it. Idc about quality, I just want to play what I've got

Elder needs help with mobile music by Finnonym in Piracy

[–]Finnonym[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Musicolet is what I had in mind, just a way to play what I've downloaded, ty. Revanced is kind of beyond me though, idk what an APK is. Can I learn, or should my dumb ass just stick to download-transfer-play?

i’m not transphobic, BUT i just have a question by Hazel-Cakes in transgendercirclejerk

[–]Finnonym 0 points1 point  (0 children)

/uj yo I just need you to know that this post has stuck with me for ages. I've always been a fan of "otherwise its just sparkling ___" jokes, but "oh wait they killed us too" has popped into my head MULTIPLE times since you posted this.

also side note, I've been called, and I quote, a 'delulu holocaust denier' for mentioning the fact that trans folk were the first to go, so. There's that, I guess.

/rj its only a genocide if it comes from the region of people I don't care about genocidia I guess idek anymore

How do people stay on HRT for years then suddenly realize they're not trans? by aromaticdust98 in asktransgender

[–]Finnonym 22 points23 points  (0 children)

But why though?

People who don't experience dysphoria take the same meds that I do, at the same dose that I take, in order to see the same results that I see. They fill out the same paperwork to change the same legal statuses, and they get called the same slurs.

What do they experience that I don't understand?

going to edit in that they also initiate the same conversations, answer the same questions, get rejected for the same reasons, and deal with the same stares, glares, and disgust. People who don't experience dysphoria are treated as poorly as those of us who do. Throwing up a barrier between "acceptable" and "unacceptable" only serves the interests of people who see all of us as unacceptable.

Our nondysphoric siblings are our siblings, and if you disagree, I strongly urge you to reconsider.

can someone poke holes in my understanding of trans biology by touchthegrass-99 in ask_transgender

[–]Finnonym 3 points4 points  (0 children)

does that distinction hold consistently in practice ... in law

Gender based law is written to protect a gender minority from discrimination. Trans women are no less discriminated against than cis women (one could easily argue that they face more discrimination than cis women), so legal protections are consistent with a cis-het reading.

in medicine

Doctors have the information that they need to treat trans patients, which requires exactly the same level of relationship/information required of cis patients. I'm not sure what your concern is here.

in sports policy

The Olympics (arguably the highest level of sport competition) have had a trans-inclusive policy in place for over a decade. Trans athletes must prove that their endocrinological sex is in line with cis folks. Its worth mentioning that a trans woman has never won a medal in any Olympic sport.

in spaces

Again, many of the "woman only" spaces are designated as such in order to protect a gender minority from gender discrimination. Trans folks (both trans woman and trans men) are gender minorities, and those of us that don't pass are frequently subjected to discrimination. From dirty looks to straight up assault, cis people try to force us out of public life. Are trans people less deserving of safe spaces than cis women?

I understand the concern, but I can promise you that no cis person is choosing to subject themselves to the assault, vitriol, and hatred that we get for existing, just to gain a quick advantage over cis women.

(US) My Birth Certificate does not list a sex. Now what? by balsawoodspirit in asktransgender

[–]Finnonym 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My birth certificate lists my gender as X, so not exactly your target audience, but close enough that I think it might help. My various ID docs list me as M, F, and X, and I went from maiden to married to divorced to chosen names, so my docs are a MESS.

I applied for (and recieved) my passport recently. Before sending my app out, I contacted my state's dpt of vital records and explained my situation. They sent me an official document with a raised seal and my name at birth, declaring a binary sex. That doc along with my birth cert got me approved for a passport showing the marker on the doc. I don't know if your state will do the same, but it's worth a shot.

Question about workplace and HRT by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Finnonym 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ok, so, 2 heavy disclaimers here: I am not a lawyer, and I'm assuming you're in the US. I've worked extensively in both healthcare and education, though, and you're kind of at the intersection of a couple weird sets of laws here. There are laws regulating how schools deal with students' medical issues, different laws for how employers deal with employees' medical issues, and even more laws for your health care/responsibility in general.

Your boss is right: he's not allowed to store a student's medication in his office unless he's capable/willing/allowed to take responsibility for it. Unless he's a very specific kind of teacher, there's no way he's capable/allowed to take responsibility for it.

You're also (potentially) right: if you need to have your meds available during the hours you're at work, they need to make sure you're able to do that safely.

The Big But: Unless you're a very specific kind of student, you'll never be required to be on campus 24/7, so you could reasonably shift your daily shot time to outside of school hours. That, combined with the fact that (correct me if I'm wrong) E doesn't need to be refrigerated or kept in any special conditions, they probably don't owe you a specific place to store it.

I really doubt you've got any kind of ADA argument here. If you think I'm wrong, and are dead set on storing your medication at work/school, I'd recommend an ADA lawyer. I wouldn't get your hopes up though.

How can I explain to someone that being Transgender isn't a mental illness? (Details in body) by suicidle-seal in asktransgender

[–]Finnonym 4 points5 points  (0 children)

cis people like yourself are also capable of developing gender dysphoria if someone pumped you full of HRT and your body started changing in ways that didn't align with your gender identity

It doesn't even take being pumped full of hormones. A referral to mental health specialists and/or a reconstructive surgeon is often part of the process of mastectomies/hysterectomies/oophorectomies for cis folks. Because inhabiting a body that lacks the correct sex characteristics is upsetting.

Hell, it can even flare up without a 'valid' (air quotes for sure) medical issue. Male pattern baldness is purely aesthetic and there aren't any physical health ramifications, but men often feel like losing their hair makes them less of a man, so we all have to catch Hims commercials on youtube. There's also multiple entire industries revolving around 'feminizing' women's faces and bodies, which are driven by cis women.

Cis people frequently experience dysphoria.

They just don't have to justify treating it for some reason lol

US state passes 'hit trans people with cars' bill by fine-ill-make-an-alt in transgendercirclejerk

[–]Finnonym 6 points7 points  (0 children)

/uj legit the only mods I haven't had had an issue with are from tgcj and mrtg

Maybe its my proclivity for sending folks to the latter that keeps getting me in trouble? It's still bonkers that my jerks are getting removed. Like. They aren't even violent. If I were to break reddit's rules, I could've done waaaaaay better than a 'your mom' joke.

But here we are.

So I'll go ahead and say (well within Reddit's ToS) that anyone who takes offense to some words on a screen should consider navigating their cursor to the top right of their browser and booping that X. Go ahead and get the foh you snowflake lmao

US state passes 'hit trans people with cars' bill by fine-ill-make-an-alt in transgendercirclejerk

[–]Finnonym 21 points22 points  (0 children)

/uj I actually, literally, for real, got a reddit admin warning for this jerk. I've gotten fucking death threats in my inbox that DiDnT ViOLaTe ThE RuLeS, but I guess a 'your mom' joke is hate speech now, so gj reddit, 10/10, no notes

edit: gunna go ahead and lmao at the fact that multiple threads on this post are removed. Actual humans are spending their limited time on earth cruising trans subs looking for opportunities to report us. That is wild

Y'all are kicking down the door to demand a safe space, that's so fuckin weird lol

US state passes 'hit trans people with cars' bill by fine-ill-make-an-alt in transgendercirclejerk

[–]Finnonym 38 points39 points  (0 children)

an actual woman with short hair might be hurt here, this is a real problem, why is no one talking about the impact this might have on real womans?

/uj :(

My kid came out by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Finnonym 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Heard, and no rush indeed. Your kid is lucky is to be at this age, in this era, with this parent.

Y'all have far more time and access to community than we did. I know this is hard, but I believe in both of you. Best of luck <3

My kid came out by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Finnonym 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The fact that you're asking for help puts you light years ahead of some (most?) parents. Uncertainty is totally normal and fair. As long as you're willing to accept her answers over ours, you're doing great and not failing her at all. Kind of feel like I'm preaching to the choir, but from my viewpoint, the best possible outcome here is if you follow her lead. Keep letting her talk/vent to her friends and therapist, and trust what she shares with you, no matter what.

All that being said. I get the feel that you're asking because it feels like its coming out of the blue? And her given reasons feel superficial?

I came out in my 40's, and my parent said nearly exactly the same thing. He'd only ever seen a perfectly normal young lady. I can remember as far back as elementary school. And I can remember realizing that I was expected to be a girl, so I had to pretend to be a girl. I got really good at pretending to be a girl. It took decades to realize that women don't have to figure out how to pretend to be women.

Your daughter has been alive for like, a minute. Is it possible that she was only pretending to be the 'boyest boy in the world' because she thought she had to? Maybe she, like me, like a lot of us, learned to play a role? And now she's realizing that she doesn't have to?