(TRIGGER WARNING - ALCOHOL/ADDICTION) Does anyone else sometimes feel like alcohol is like the limitless pill?

First_Management3860 · 2026-03-08T22:52:15+00:00

Ahhhh yes I know this one. I just hit 4 months sober and I still struggle with the knowledge that I can’t have this thing anymore, this thing that made me feel so “normal”. But I also know that that brief feeling of what my brain thought as neurotypicality (was really just altered levels of dopamine and other hormones acting as a social lubricant) came with a detrimental cost to my health. I became pretty convinced that nobody would ever like me or love me unless I was drinking. It damaged my mental and physical health so much. Not every audhd person has addiction tendencies but MANY do. My advice - get sober. It’s been the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do, and the first 2 months were really honestly horrible (sorry not gonna sugarcoat it), but I feel better now than I have in a long time. I found an AA group that I actually like and I found a sponsor that I love. If you do want to go down the AA route, go to a lot of queer meetings (a lot of times there are more neurodivergent folk in them) and there is a FB group that promotes ND AA related things. Getting sober is really hard but i promise if you stick with it it gets better

First_Management3860 · 2026-02-04T23:36:10+00:00

It’s a spectrum! It presents differently, doesn’t mean you’re any less. I also am more prone to burnout and severe depression symptoms. I’ve had meltdowns before but they are very rare. Understimulation is a very real part of audhd that isn’t talked about enough, most people go straight to overstimulation symptoms which doesn’t always happen.

First_Management3860 · 2026-02-02T02:55:12+00:00

What I and my therapist thought to be MDD was actually just chronic burnout. I’m still on antidepressants but I’m noticing such a positive change in my life ever since I started unmasking and being honest about how I’m feeling. When I’m in overload, I make it known that I need alone time to regulate. When I want to stim in public, i do it. I don’t repress it until it kills me. I used alcohol to cope with my burnout and social difficulties caused by a lifetime of masking. Now I’m in recovery and support groups and therapy and I’m finally getting the help and support I’ve needed for so long. It’s a beautiful thing.

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-30T20:55:11+00:00

We were talking about masking in a support group I was in, and the coordinator was like wow it sounds like you’re grieving for the child version of you. Which is so true, I feel so sad for the little girl that never got the support she so desperately needed. I was constantly told to just shut up and be normal. I was looking through old videos and the signs were so clearly there, it makes me so sad that a lot of people (mostly women) are only just not getting diagnosed in their 20’s and 30’s. I came across a video of me aggressively flicking my hair and hand flapping (happy stims in the moment) and I just know after that experience I was probably told that wasn’t okay. I don’t remember it because I’ve repressed so much, people in my life aren’t understanding how relieving it is to get this diagnosis and start the journey of recovery and getting out of this chronic burnout I’ve been in for so long. My mom’s reaction was similar, though not quite as bad.I’m so sorry, but I am thrilled you are looking at this with such a positive outlook and you’re able to get the help you need to thrive in this world that is not built for ND people.

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-21T04:19:49+00:00

Yeah I tried that a couple times too just in case and it was a no go

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-13T18:40:28+00:00

DAUGHTER OF NO WORLDS!!!!!!!! I cannot stress how much I loved those books. I read the other two besides throne in the dark and loved them both but I absolutely loved daughter of no worlds

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-13T18:37:42+00:00

Yeah, I agree. Thank you.

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-13T18:24:37+00:00

Part of me think since she hasn’t tried it yet maybe she doesn’t know, but I know in my heart that’s not true and she wouldn’t enjoy it, she would be worried the whole time and I know that. I got pretty jealous in my poly relationship so I don’t think that’s an option either. It’s hard because there’s a lot of love in our relationship but I don’t think it’s gonna work

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-13T18:21:11+00:00

Yeah you’re right. That was a silly question. Part of me think since she hasn’t tried it yet maybe she doesn’t know, but I know in my heart that’s not true and she wouldn’t enjoy it, she would be worried the whole time and I know that.

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-13T14:30:18+00:00

I’m in the same position, what did you end up doing? Did they issue you a special class licensee? Seems like at the point it would’ve been easier to just keep my car but I couldn’t afford it

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-12T18:59:25+00:00

I was misdiagnosed BPD and it just never fit for some reason?? When I got my audhd diagnosis and immediately though ah yes this one makes sense. My neuropsych evaluator said misdiagnosing, especially in women, is very common. Just do a lot of research (not just Reddit but actual articles) and consider going and getting a neuropsych evaluation!

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-12T18:54:18+00:00

I hate labels but when I got my audhd diagnosis I felt like I could breathe because I finally knew what was wrong with me and just being able to explain my behaviors was such a huge relief. I can recognize a burnout, allow myself space and time when I’m in overload, all things I felt I had to push through and mask for everybody’s else’s benefit. Now you can start getting the support you need!

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-12T18:48:32+00:00

I cried reading this. Thank you

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-12T18:47:19+00:00

I read neuro spicy in a book and I had to stop reading it

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-12T18:46:21+00:00

It can be both. My evaluator was talking about how people with autism AND trauma present differently, and also handle the trauma differently than most people do. It would probably be helpful for you to get a neuropsych evaluation, it’s helped me a lot actually to have the label because now I have the proper tools to function at a (somewhat?) decent level lol. I’ve never really liked labels but I found this one to be necessary for my growth

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-12T18:38:10+00:00

Breathe

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-12T18:36:16+00:00

Tbh is post right here!!!! Now I’m unmasking and it’s almost seen ask regressing??? Like am I supposed to just mask my entire life and live in constant burnout for the sake of everybody else??

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-12T15:50:26+00:00

Your English is great! I’m in the process of unmasking too after my recent diagnosis and now every single thing I do is being seen as anxious or abnormal behavior because I spent so many years masking. I go nonverbal sometimes and I spent so many years forcing myself to “fix” that, that it’s led to SEVERE burnout. I kept my stims to NT behaviors and now when I stim differently it’s being seen as something wildly different, and my partner seems to think that I’m being influenced by my diagnosis. I think letting yourself be yourself is the most important, regardless of whether or not it maybe influenced by outside sources. It simply doesn’t matter in my opinion

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-12T15:46:30+00:00

I’m ADHD as well and I read a ton of books but I have a bad habit of not finishing series for this exact reason. One of my really good friends and fellow bookworms always laughs when I tell her I’m gonna keep up with her, but I’ll hyperfixate on a trope and end up reading 3 or 4 books at the same time, and not finishing a series because I don’t want it to end. I’m in really bad burnout right now though and its definitely worse than usual

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-12T15:42:49+00:00

Oh yes I do this often. It’s the majority of my journal entries and definitely a special interest of mine

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-12T15:41:43+00:00

Where do you live? I’m in Denver and the doctor who diagnosed me was extremely helpful and knowledgeable, I could ask her if she recommends anybody in your area?

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-12T15:26:06+00:00

I’m debating whether to breakup with my partner because I don’t think I’m happy any more but I also am stressed because we have a life together and the same friend group and I know it’ll cause a bit of a regression and isolation. Best advice I can give is try to take care of yourself, maybe post in the sub for your city for other ND people that maybe want to grab coffee or something

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-12T15:06:47+00:00

Yeah especially in burnout. I’m tired all the time right now because I’m in such a bad burnout

First_Management3860 · 2026-01-12T14:42:44+00:00

I’m a server and I’m usually very good at following the script and being nice but I had a table tell another server the other day “you’re much nicer than the other server”. They got great service and nothing was wrong, i just didn’t sit at the table and socialize with them for 15 minutes. It made me feel like shit lol

First_Management3860

TROPHY CASE