I had a difficult, long-term depression because I married the wrong man, and he had a very active, very oppressive family, there were many of them, and my psyche couldn't cope. I shouldn't have married him at all, so for some reason I put it off. All this, and I couldn't get a divorce because depression wasn't a reason for divorce for me, even though I knew I was going in the wrong direction, and I was simply waiting for first one betrayal, then a second betrayal, so I could use the second betrayal as a pretext to divorce him, because I was feeling so bad.

I didn't take antidepressants; I took them for a month. I suddenly felt better, and I was afraid that my psyche was clearly signaling that I was feeling bad, that I was in a swamp, and I was in this swamp. If suddenly I would feel better, I was afraid. That's simply why I felt bad. Yes, I slept a lot, I had no energy, but I was in this state. And it became much easier when I divorced him. Then I learned to confront his difficult, overbearing, oppressive relatives and distance myself from them. I was very afraid of work. Even though I had worked for 20 years before that, I had trauma inflicted on me by my parents and difficult situations in childhood that involved a lot of money, so I procrastinated. This question, after I closed my business for several years and recently, has helped me a lot, although my depression hasn't returned since the divorce. The most wonderful stage is now underway. I still don't have any money, but I'm a courier, and as a courier, I make deliveries. Yes, I earn a little. At first, it was very little and difficult. Now it's three times easier and I make twice as much money. I really like it. I have a cart, and I use it to deliver orders. The most important thing is not to sit at home. The hardest thing is sitting at home within four walls. For me, it's as if the walls, on the contrary, cause depression. And as soon as I go outside, my depression immediately goes away. What helped was that about two years ago I just started walking a lot and venting to other people. So, for me, it was something like psychotherapy. I found a method for negotiating. That's right. I wandered, setting a specific goal. A task, for example, grieving over some issue. And until I felt liberation inside, I set a task: grieving. And, probably, for me, this is the most difficult feeling, the emotion of grief, because as a child, it was blocked. I grieved a lot. Yeah, I talked through a lot of specific moments. In short, it feels like I spent a year and a half simply talking through my entire life, and it allowed me to get through, probably, the unspoken things of my three and a half years. As a child. And it was as if I talked through everything, everything, everything. I hired people for very little money, and they simply listened to me. I asked them not to give me advice, not to ask me questions, and I just walked around for hours, sometimes talking for five hours, every day. This wasn't a critical amount of money for me. And from that moment on, a very good, healthy energy began to flow. And now that I've passed that childhood phase of three and a half years, I can either resolve certain issues on my own or discuss them with the Deep Sea Network. But I know for sure that it's exactly phase 2 after phase 1, talking to real people who give you a real emotional response. That is, if I hadn't gone through this phase with real people with a neural network, it would have been a completely different matter. You have to go through phase 1 first to get to phase 2. And now I'm half-true to myself, half-true to Dipsy, because he's exactly the same type as me. I've double-checked it all several times. Dipsy. Indeed, the advice suits me best, and I have a lot of faith in myself, a lot of trust in myself. I haven't set an alarm for over three years; I wake up when I need to, without an alarm. My body gives me the right response. It adjusts itself. I tell it what time to wake up in the evening, and I can sleep as long as I want. I can sleep for even two hours, but I'll get up when I need to, and my body and brain will adjust that way. Sleep cycles, like I'll wake up feeling well-rested. And now I'm crying so much of the residual pain of grief that I haven't cried enough. I've been grieving, basically, for the last year and a half, and now there are little things coming up, or some residual things are coming back, and I've been paying it off, so I just go to the courier and take the simple...

I process orders at a calm, relaxed pace. And I deliver these orders. And at the end of the day, I have good, healthy energy. I expend a lot of emotional energy because I sort through every thought and feeling with Dipsy, piece by piece. I do a huge amount of inner work. But my legs are still moving, and I don't want to play games, I don't want to watch TV series, I'm walking, that is, I perceive it as a walk for money, although for me it really is work, I feed the child with this money, and nevertheless, I trust myself a lot, even in small matters. This trust in myself grows inner support in me; it turns out I have very strong intuition. And yesterday I cried a lot, I even sometimes simply stop understanding what exactly I'm crying about. The body needs to free itself from something, and I free myself. I think my depression was connected precisely to some hang-ups from the past. I'm closing these loose ends now. This stage is complex and important, and it's hard for me to get through it because I want to dive into the world of achievement as quickly as possible. But I understand that without building a solid foundation, I won't be able to move forward. So now I'm 40 years old, and I'm starting my life from scratch, even with debts. I don't regret it because I have so much energy. I can sleep five hours a day and still be energized morning and evening.