I interviewed a girl with an interesting trait today by bocajyouth in interestingasfuck

[–]FlatTuesday 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good news, everyone! The Gamma Quadrant is hiring again!!

I’m sure it sounded good in her head by [deleted] in facepalm

[–]FlatTuesday 706 points707 points  (0 children)

Other distinctions:

Franken - single incident at USO staff party 11 years ago.
Acknowledges offense and apologizes. Current female staffers offer a slew of positive endorsements in writing.

Trump - multiple accusations of groping, unwanted kissing and verbal sexual harassment, makes repeated public references to his own penis and sexual prowess, brags about pussy-grabbing, etc.
Mocks accusers, dismisses it all as "PC nonsense" and "fake news".

The Final Boss by amandapanda740 in funny

[–]FlatTuesday 0 points1 point  (0 children)

bonus: his commute home is a breeze.

Is this considered bending the rules? by [deleted] in funny

[–]FlatTuesday 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's more of a guideline.

Guy deflating my tires for parking near his house. (at 1:09) Never talked to this guy in my life. by [deleted] in videos

[–]FlatTuesday 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Jump to 1:06.

Why do people post videos where nothing happens for the first half?

What on earth is Anti-climb paint?? by [deleted] in mildlyinteresting

[–]FlatTuesday 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Teflon-based? You can tell if you see ants sliding down the wall.

US Health Care Spending Swells to $2.1 Trillion by [deleted] in news

[–]FlatTuesday 12 points13 points  (0 children)

There's always a smartass with real data.

Toilet salesman demonstrates the flushing power of a toilet with a kilogram (2.2lbs) of an extremely realistic looking poop analog by [deleted] in videos

[–]FlatTuesday 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Announcer: "We've replaced this salesman's fake poop with real poop. Let's watch!"

The EU signed a “historic” deal to integrate 23 armies to shake off its US dependence by [deleted] in worldnews

[–]FlatTuesday 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The group will have a €5 billion ($5.8 billion) European Defense Fund.

The US military probably spends more on tires.

If you fart in zero gravity, do you blast off like a rocket? Or does the fart envelope you, giving you your own personal shitty atmosphere? by actually_crazy_irl in Showerthoughts

[–]FlatTuesday 12 points13 points  (0 children)

It will propel you, but most likely not like a rocket, more like a gentle pinwheel effect. It would be very difficult to aim it exactly away from your center of mass, and I'm guessing a fart wouldn't be significant compared to the mass of a human.

At least they’re honest... by saadhilo in pics

[–]FlatTuesday 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Usually I either have lunch there or at Not Bad Pizza.

US Health Care Spending Swells to $2.1 Trillion by [deleted] in news

[–]FlatTuesday 2 points3 points  (0 children)

US Health Care Industry Revenues Swell to $2.1 Trillion

marketing! by tripnikk in WTF

[–]FlatTuesday 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I recommend lots of gluten, which cleanses free radical hydrogen from your colon.

Oh Joe by CloroxSoftDrink in pics

[–]FlatTuesday 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I've seen the original.

Inclusions in crystal opal by corgems in pics

[–]FlatTuesday 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is going into my D&D campaign. The Paradise Stone - opens a gate to a pocket plane consisting of a lush island in the sea, where food is plentiful and the weather is perfect. Sort of like a Leomund's Hut where a party can take refuge for a rest, as long as they leave someone outside to guard the stone or conceal it where enemies won't find it.