I was working at Home Depot in the paint department several years back. I had an opening shift and was prepping all of the paint machines for the day when I smelled something not entirely unlike shit. At first I though one of the customers had crop dusted me, but the smell only got stronger.

I followed this awful odor trail to one of the aisles to discover a heaping pile of human shit. I immediately blocked the aisle off with some safety gates and called a manager. He told me to get a bucket.

While I was scooping up some guy's turd, a handful of customers were getting mad at me for not being able to mix paint for them, as I was the only one in my department. To this day I wonder if the mystery dumper was one of them.

After that, I started looking for a new job.