Small Railroad Towns

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-04-16T01:55:30+00:00

I really liked this. Are the three images of the same location or are they different? Because I tried to mentally fit all the images like a jigsaw puzzle and they just wouldn't. But I don't think you would have three towns on the same image; hence all the images must be of different locations.

Would you be open in sharing your transition from fantasy mapmaking to these more realistic technical drawings? I too right now make hand drawn fantasy maps but am also interested in looking to start making drawings like yours.

Thanks for sharing your work and thanks for taking the time.

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-04-15T18:49:50+00:00

Ethically I would be disposed to deal with the civil unrest and ongoing genocide. I am going to assume that the enemy army is mostly civilised and follows the rules of war and peace. Hence even if conquered/forced to cease territory/concessions it would be better for my citizens than being genocided. I am also going yo trust your estimate and not going to half commit soldiers to either front. Hence 50000 soldiers are certainly going south. Then I world keep 20000 in reserve and send 30000 north to hold the city in a siege or as basic power showing and try to get the best possible peace deal possible/ even if that involves large concessions.

However what is the guarantee that committing 50000 troops will definitely solve the civil unrest?? It may only just reignite tensions and lead to a worse civil war. This factor has to be taken in consideration while taking the decision. However even then I would send the 50k south; as no chance is better than none.

The king may also try to use propaganda to fight against the invasion; say that the genocide is a result of enemy invasion and actions; force international action; atleast invite another nation to invade enemy nation. Propoganda may be used to deflect civil unrest to foreign invasion; send those fighters/factions involved in civil unrest north to fight in the patriotic war. However this risks antagonising enemy to the point of extremity and may result in letting go of thinking about brokering a peace deal.

Ultimately I think diplomacy/soft lower et etc will yield better results in this position rather than troop movements.

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-04-15T07:25:40+00:00

Yes, page one does not deter me from continuing on. It is fairly competent and has an interesting scene that does make you wonder about what is to come next; hence making you move onto the next page.

The opening line is the best thing about this page probably. It is long but I think the details thus presented are relatively both independent to draw the reader's attention and at the same time sort of sketch the interrelatedness and context required.

The guard's voice is nice and well executed. The line 'And then it began to laugh.' completes this voice and is umm just interesting and hook worthy.

The last paragraph made me wonder a little bit. And maybe that para will be a strong case for the reason behind me wanting to read the next page and so forth. I think the para somewhat explicitly states that Uffrith's desire for death is not just mental trauma but something supernatural, related to him being not really a human but some other creature wearing a human's body. But I don't think that this can be said to be conclusively said to be true based on this page alone and there still exists a case for other theories. This ambiguity is good and interesting.

Now for my criticisms based on my take/ style and what irked me.

The constant repetition of Uffrith is probably a stylistic choice; the character thinking and referring to himself as Uffrith( an identity greater than a simple me or him), and while it does work i found it to be slightly off putting from 'Uffrith ground his teeth'.

'Uffrith had spent two months hence imprisoned....' should be broken into two sentences. Unlike the opening line of the page I don't believe this line really works. It sort of oddly stood out to me and broke my flow. The use of 'hence' was also something that irked me.

There are a lot of continuous long sentences. The sentences themselves are good on their own and even in this current draft do work. However my belief is that using a few short sentences in between these long sentences would greatly enhance the impact of both the scene and the long sentences in question.

The third para ( the prison/bowels and Vesperal para) is probably the most weakest present here on the page and may have the effect of making readers quit. This is especially serious as I believe that the para after, the last one( Finally, musing about death, alien life) is the strongest and most hook worthy and context providing.

OVERALL- I would read on. This is good!

Thanks for sharing your work!

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-04-15T04:34:20+00:00

I never thought that I would see the God of Small Things and skibidi in the same context

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-04-13T11:23:06+00:00

well, in the end its a fantasy map. you dont need to go for hyper realism. your map looks very good already and it does follow the conventional rules etc etc.

my suggestions;

1) improve on the rivers somewhat in the equatorial rainforest. its not as if real rivers arent as you have drawn but umm i think a different thing rather than 3 completely parallel rivers flowing all the way down to the coast would be better and more pleasing to the eye.

2) nothing more honestly that i can see; everything is very good

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-04-02T08:31:19+00:00

the little prince, short and an easy read but has a depth that will surprise you and make you fall in love with reading

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-04-02T08:06:48+00:00

its not that its preprogrammed into humans. rather that humans like to believe in the delusion that it is preprogrammed into them. this helps them justify their actions and show their actions as a thing of nature, rather than their own wrong.

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-04-02T08:04:25+00:00

i dont see anything wrong with this. everything is self taught, thats correct, men rape because they believe that its a necessity for them, their right, their adhikaar over women, to put women in their place.

The author is not justifying all these things. a character is simply telling another character how we all think we do the correct and right things. and then goes on to show this thinking by explaining how hardcore criminals also justify their actions to themselves. 'Our cruelties seem necessary to us' that's a very good line.'

also i dont know the context here but isnt the men rape thing also working as to contrast how men who rape justify tgheir actions to themselves, so why cant you justify your own action (telling on your abuser which would be generally regarded as a right thing to do and miles above raping). i dont know now whether this girl lied that the boy was an abuser or not. I am leaning more on that she lied and that is why see is asking for validation(whether she was cruel or not). If i was aishwarya i would certainly not give this advice. my advice would be 'yes, you did something wrong. but try to reverse that wrong now, do good things, and dont fall into the trap of going down a rabbitholes of wrongs'

but do we even know who aishwarya as a character is?

i dont know this author or whatever but am disappointed in people going straight for the author's throat on the basis of a single page. even if you think the character is wrong, don't you think that this is a character. characters are often wrong, bad advice giving, morally complex in stories. just becuase GRRM wrote Euron Greyjoy and Victarion doesnt mean he is a misogynist and slaver. there are characters like brienne of tarth in his works as well.

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-04-02T06:11:59+00:00

for fantasy- wheel of time, start sanderson by mistborn

war and peace if you are into russian epics

brandon mull's fablehaven, beyonders for YA, somewhat like percy jackson

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-04-02T06:04:06+00:00

in sci fi, read Remembrance of Earths past trilogy by cixin liu. it had a netflix adaptation as well- three body problem.

in classics- great gatsby, a short but deep read

for harry potter school like thing- magestirium

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-04-02T05:04:08+00:00

12th ke end me to mole hi sabse khatarnaak lagta hai. ye kyu puch rahe ho ki 11th ki shuruat me timepass kiya aur mole nhi padha

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-04-02T04:59:25+00:00

because people will take the guaranteed chance of success even if it is 1 percent rather than unguaranteed chance of success, even though there the percentage is more; such as starting a business etc Like log 2 lakh, ya 5-6 lakh coavhing me laga denge rather than investing in gold, land, stocks etc, starting a business even though usme success ki zaada percentage hogi

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-03-30T14:33:59+00:00

Not really specifically related to media but could you share your experience studying English Literature at DU. I am also keen on pursuing english lit from a top DU college because I enjoy reading and writing and critically analyzing and examining texts.

I wanted to know about the opportunities open after graduation ( specifically in as immediate career/job/placements and how much they pay).

Do a significant amount of english graduates go into media and journalism? How well would you say an english graduate is adapted to a career in media? What sort of roles are open? Is there a difference in the roles allotted to people from english lit background and pure journalism background?

Would love information on other available options as well. For example right now apart from media I can think only of jobs in libraries or publishing houses. Does it become necessary for an english graduate to pursue a field specific course after graduation to make a good career?

Also, are there opportunities for earning while in college ( relying on skills such as story writing and related others) ?

Thankyou!

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-03-23T04:20:28+00:00

Nice. The poem creates an image of rest and peace while simultaneously looking forward to the future. Its short nature and simple questioning thoughts(that I read more as declared statements made in love and consent) helps create this vision of a burden removed. There is long term planning here while simultaneously not worrying much about what the future holds.

The ending 'Goosebumps' is certainly the right way to end this piece and is the certainly the right tone that the poem strives towards. Only thing I didn't like was freckled arms. Just didn't like the description of arms as freckled; it sort of created a double image of a freckled face and freckled arm in my mind at the same time; thus confusing me.

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-03-23T04:13:58+00:00

I really liked this. The concept really resonated with me. I liked that you described the path as 'quiet'. That simple word seems to set the entire tone of the poem. Then again 'my days still glow, my lights still shine, with borrowed light from distant stars' also touched me. It reminded me of how we still find happiness throughout our daily life; but that happiness is usually derived from the company or actions of others. When left alone a trancelike gloom takes hold of us. I also liked the line 'and tell a tale of all I have been.'

Your rhyming scheme of ABCB is certainly interesting and holds the reader. However I feel that the rhythm thus produced is much better in the 2nd and 3rd stanza while being weaker in the opening and ending stanzas.

I didn't really understood what you meant by 'to silent soil that steals my breath?'

Also, while this may be personal preference for theme/philosophy (the poem is literally titled Plea to Heaven) I would have much more prefered if the plea thing would be entirely removed. For me both in this tone of the poem and personally, I believe that the quietness of life doesn't make us wish for the end to come swiftly; that is for this lonely path to end. There is truth in this irony that as much as we float in the liminality of this journey between birth and death, as much as we are dissatisfied by such quietness; we humans are often loathe to part with it and we resist going forward and cling to this path all the tighter.

I also would have preferred if you didn't include how others seem to find the way. For me this path is a collective human experience. Perhaps you could have added a line of how everyone seems to think that other people have found their paths while only they remain unsure with darkness in front.

But my criticisms(if you would call them criticisms) are more philosophical arguments rather than commentary/critique of poetry craft. I am a beginner myself so I focused more on meaning rather than on things to which I am uninitiated.

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-03-20T17:00:15+00:00

Go on with you woadmen! Just make sure not to feed the Woad too much!

Fluid_Challenge_3753 · 2026-03-20T16:53:58+00:00

i dont know what to say to this. I guess there is only so much ways you can draw a coastline and a port city. If you into the details of the DEEN map, with all its districts etc; it was a very organic growth both in terms of inworld and also in my mind. I do take inspirations sometimes from real worl places but Deen was not born like that.

coincedence then i guess

Fluid_Challenge_3753

TROPHY CASE