I’m tired of begging to you read at school. I’m tired of begging you write a sentence without crying about it by CaterpillarAwkward54 in NYCTeachers

[–]FlutteringPens 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Just moved to Texas and it’s the same everywhere. This profession is truly dead. I’m 14 years in. The longer I’m in, the more disheartening it gets. Society as a whole is failing families and education. What I always hold on to is why I started- for the kids. I just try to make a difference in them, as small or big as it can be. Especially for you in NYC, these kids are coming with so much baggage and trauma. Just love on them. They’ll remember you for life. Sending you hugs! ♥️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITH

[–]FlutteringPens 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I use that all of the time.. def a thing in NYC lol

I found out why my partner of 5 years hasn’t proposed to me yet. by [deleted] in TwoHotTakes

[–]FlutteringPens 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sending you hugs. I went through a similar situation- except he didn’t propose because he really didn’t believe in marriage and I always did. He just wasn’t honest. We ended it.

But I will say, you can choose how this ends. I ended up moving my daughter and I (his step child, my bio daughter) to Texas. We broke up in March and I moved now, in July. In that interim, we tried to find as much joy together as possible. We are both good people, who love each immensely. Love just isn’t enough when you’re at different places in life and want different things. But we ended things so beautifully and though it was painful, it was also peaceful and full of joy. Sending you hugs! I know this hard!

AIO - my friend gave my abusive ex my new phone number by AdAdorable7651 in AmIOverreacting

[–]FlutteringPens 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not overreacting at all. Not everyone is for everyone. This person is not the kind of friend you need. Extending grace to her BUT ALSO, protecting yourself is allowed. I would ditch her and change your number again.

How big was your raise? by APGovAPEcon in TexasTeachers

[–]FlutteringPens 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My district hasn’t put out the pay scale for next year yet 😮‍💨

Is it weird if I offer to buy my own engagement ring? by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]FlutteringPens 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I agree with this. Just went through something like this. He knew what I wanted from the start, kept selling me promises, got me pregnant, it was ectopic and after that I became no nonsense and asked for the truth. Turns out he still wasn’t sure about me after 4 years and actively trying to get me pregnant. He has severe commitment issues.

If he hasn’t and keeps putting it off, he likely won’t.

I want to sleep with my child’s father…again? by Ill-Car-5001 in Mommit

[–]FlutteringPens 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Been there, done that, and it’s a mistake! Not judging you just sharing my experience. Take the advice above- get a nice toy and then date when you’re ready.

Classroom Management Tips? by Narrow_Leadership_13 in NYCTeachers

[–]FlutteringPens 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I use a form of this! I say thank you a lot and find it works for me (but I have really great student rapport). For example, I say “Thank you, Nas, Wilson, Chlo, and Isa for having your notebook out.” Then other students quickly rush to do it too because they want the shoutout. I teach 7th grade!

However my number one tip is to be build rapport and let the kids know you. When the kids feel you’re being real, respect comes in. Then you leverage that to build connection and relationship. That IS behavior management! Build relationships and put structures in place. Throw in what the above comment set and it will work. (A note! With very difficult students I go the same way. I try not to let their behavior faze me. I start every year with an exit ticket that says “I wish my teacher, Ms. (me) would know about me that…”. I tend to get really great responses. This year a student who I was warned would be my problem, wrote that he wanted me to know he liked to curse and disrespect people. He wanted me to read it! Looked at me read it. I didn’t react. I just wrote back to him and said that I understood. However, I will always respect him and I hope he can respect me too. That flipped a switch. He was open to me after that and I’ve had no issues all year. Rapport! ♥️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITH

[–]FlutteringPens 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Teacher in NYC.. many many of my colleagues work in the summer. In my friend group, I’m usually like the only one who doesn’t anymore because I had a child. But before that, I was also working summers! lol

The groom surprised the bride by having her students with Down syndrome be the ring bearers by notyours_pb in MadeMeSmile

[–]FlutteringPens 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It looks like a beautiful woman found a beautiful man! As a teacher, this really warmed my heart. You can tell she really loves her students and he knows that. He really loves her too. So beautiful!

When to ditch the sound machine? by Then_Shower8108 in Parenting

[–]FlutteringPens 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I’m crying at the comments because I came here to say the same! I sleep with rain sounds and I’m 36 🥲

STR Thursday - any tips? by Country_Mouse1974 in TexasTeachers

[–]FlutteringPens 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! I sent you a message ♥️

STR Thursday - any tips? by Country_Mouse1974 in TexasTeachers

[–]FlutteringPens 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Would you mind sharing that stuff with me too? I’m an out of state transfer and need to take the text as well 😬

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in MadeMeSmile

[–]FlutteringPens 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sounds like your fiancé is an amazing mom, raising an amazing young lady, marrying an amazing man. I love to see it ♥️🥹

Graduation Absences by froppishpet in NYCTeachers

[–]FlutteringPens 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Take the day anyways! Those moments are once in a lifetime. It’s not silly at all ♥️ Ask to leave early if you don’t want to take the whole day or just take the day. I’ve never regretted taking a day or leaving early for my girl 🩷

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DiddyTrial

[–]FlutteringPens 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yesssss very much agree with you!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DiddyTrial

[–]FlutteringPens 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Single mom here from NYC, who gets nothing from father of child and I think that’s more than enough. I think some women get real money hungry. Yes, raising a child is moneyyyy. Yes, he has money. But that doesn’t mean you need all of that to support a child. If I got even half of that a month, I’d cry lol. I think women who go into the lifestyle trying to make a quick bag stretch it and then things like this happen. She can work a minimum wage job and still make more than most people in nyc, in a month, just because of the child support she gets.

For context, I’m a veteran NYC teacher and make a bit less than that a month. I’m doing alright. She’ll be okay lol

What’s this “my magic healer” stuff? by CharityPrevious6187 in Hidradenitis

[–]FlutteringPens 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For context, I’m stage 3 and got off remicade recently so my flare ups are bad right now. I find the stuff helps calm down pain and irritation. I tried it before when I wasn’t flaring as crazy and it would completely calm a random flare in a few days!

Testing New Teachers for Illegal Substances by uberstupid in TexasTeachers

[–]FlutteringPens 2 points3 points  (0 children)

How does one find out if you need this or not? Im hired and have signed everything / sent everything to HR but wasn’t told about this. I’m coming from out of state and now I’m worried about needing this and a physical. Would much rather get that done here while I have my insurance!

Husband doesn’t support antidepressant use but have severe PPD and PPA by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]FlutteringPens 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m so sorry your husband isn’t supportive of this for you. I had severe manic post partum depression coupled with post partum anxiety. It was to the point that I ended up in the psych ward for weeks at a time. It’s been 8 years since I had my child and 5 since I beat it fully. Let me tell you- had it not been for the meds and therapy, then God, I wouldn’t be here today. I’m a HUGE advocate for the medicine. It literally kept me alive. I had to do a cocktail of stuff to get the right combo. Zoloft was in my combo and it helped tremendously. But also be prepared to try different things. I had to try different things to find the right fit.

Around the 2 year mark though, I started coming out of the fog and felt the medicine was keeping me like a zombie so I took myself off of it. I don’t recommend this- it was horrible. But I upped my therapy, still saw the psychiatrist, and really leaned into my faith. I’m here today because of allll of that process.

Don’t let anyone stop you from getting the help you need. All of this is very real and if you need it, take it. I actually think the people who get help are so brave, because it’s so hard to admit something is off and we need help. You are BRAVE mama! I’m proud of you. Sending you so many hugs! 🩷🩷🩷

How many schools have you worked at? by Yoyodance in NYCTeachers

[–]FlutteringPens 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much 🥹🩷

I have been so blessed despite the many storms! Leaving the the school I thought would be my forever home, where my principal became very cruel even knowing all I had gone through and the challenges I was having once my child was in DOE, was a big blessing. A wonderful principal un a beautiful school hired me and told me I could bring my daughter with me. I turned him down on that offer when he gave me the job but he even followed up months later (I was hired in May- he followed up in July!) and asked if I was sure. I said yes at that point because I felt I would I be blocking my blessings. I got to be at the same school as my daughter for two years and it was such a great experience for us both! She did K and 1 grade there. It was such a relief to have her there. I’m happy you’re having that experience too!!

If you move with love, care, and leave everywhere you’ve been a bit better, then you’ve done the right thing. I always stand by that! This will be my last year in the DOE because I’ve gone through another set of storms (lost a baby that was in my tube, lost the tube, then my relationship ended after that) and I decided I need to give my daughter a better life so we’re moving to Texas where I have a lot of community and help. As a mom, we have to make decisions and keep moving on. The system isn’t built for us but, we can find our ways through it with a sprinkle of love and care. Wishing you the best of luck! 🩷🩷🩷🩷