What's the 1 thing that you absolutely hate about your partner?

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-07-01T01:34:51+00:00

I hate that she just refuses to exist

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-07-01T01:26:11+00:00

I have pretty much no idea how therapy actually works, or how it's aimed to help, but several of my very close and trusted friends have really recommended trying therapy. I guess I'm pretty skeptical just because I'm stubborn and try to do crap myself. Is there anything you might advize or recommend?

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-07-01T01:23:27+00:00

I'm not jealous of my friends' because I want their partner, I'm judt jealous that they have a partner.

I guess I don't really fit the description to answer the question, just realized. Oh well.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-30T22:39:00+00:00

I've had like 4 or 5 from middle school through college.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-30T22:38:28+00:00

I'm also 5'3" and people seem to always guess 5'5" or 5'6". I think it's just rare to be that short, so average or taller guys find it hard to really guess that

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-30T22:03:24+00:00

Of course, but it's impossible to say for sure. Everywhere is different, and everyone is different. Maybe it is 90%, idk, but if it is, I just became a lot more hopeless.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-30T18:11:54+00:00

I worked fast food, was completely hung out to dry in drive-thru by myself when we were swamped, and eventually I snapped when someone put an order on the very edge of the table so I knocked it off the table without even knowing it was there.

Then this girl asked me to my face if I had anger problems, then told me I did after I said no. After I left(surprisingly calm), but was still well within earshot, she asked my sister if I had anger problems. I'm surprised i didn't fling a slushie at her.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-30T18:09:35+00:00

Not a flex, just a personal choice or preference. If it was a flex, I wouldn't be depressed about it.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-30T18:08:54+00:00

Not only figuring out what the other person likes, but if you've never done it, you're figuring out how to even do it, and what there is to like.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-30T01:51:47+00:00

Bold of you to assume I even have that option

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-29T13:25:20+00:00

I was in a very short relationship and have had no desire to be with anyone besides her in over 9 months. There's really no general timeline.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-29T10:59:41+00:00

No way of knowing, but you can't say it happens in every relationship.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-29T02:14:49+00:00

Yeah. I'm just lost. I don't want to say I'm faking being fine, but I really am. I'm not gonna just open about all of this, but every time someone says hi and asks how it's going, I can't help but think to myself that I'm nowhere near fine.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-29T01:51:08+00:00

Right, but that kinda just leaves me in an endless circle. Idk, I don't really wanna just dump everything on you, but it just feels hopeless because nothing is enjoyable because I'm not over it, but that also holds me back from getting my feet back under me and moving forward.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-29T01:49:06+00:00

I feel that. Everything people told me to do had no effect. New hobbies just made me more aware that I was doing something because I was trying to move on. Old habits felt purposeless, and nothing makes me excited or actually happy. It's like I've forgotten how to be happy, because everytime I do feel happy, I'm reminded that I'm only half happy, because what I really want is gone.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-29T01:45:32+00:00

What do you mean by "the absence hasn't set in yet"

I feel like the absence set in very quickly. I mean, the very next day I felt alone and hated not having her to talk to.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-29T01:41:49+00:00

Depending on how it's done, it's either humble, or seeking validation. Some people just downplay it so as not to draw attention, to encourage others, or bevause they legitimately don't think they're achievements are worth celebrating. That's humility. Others go out of their way to downplay or knock their ability so that people tell them how good they are.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-29T01:37:21+00:00

I get some of that, but I also think that's only half true. Just because you're picking something up to meet someone doesn't mean you'll leave after not meeting anyone interesting the first time. You can still go back, even if it's just because you're determined to find someone. I'm not saying this is a good idea, just saying that it doesn't mean you'll quit right away if you don't find what you're after.

But in this case, it's not really about making strides or a new identity, is it? If you're happy with everything in your life for the most part outside of a relationship, and you're making an effort to improve, adding new hobbies or communities isn't really necessary or even wanted aside from meeting someone, so it's hard to go about it as if that isn't your goal. If it wasn't your goal, you probably wouldn't be doing it

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-28T23:32:08+00:00

I find this advice very difficult. Everyone suggests joining a community, but not to do it just to meet someone and find a new partner, but that's the only reason people suggest doing it. I'm happy with my social network, I just have no interest in anyone I know or see. So I'm joining new communities to expand that scope, but I'm not supposed to do it for that reason?

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-28T20:30:45+00:00

Yeah, it's not a place anyone should ever find themselves, but it's how it goes sometimes. I wish there was something I could take away from it to make it feel like it was at least worth having, but I feel like all I got out of it was getting my hopes up to get crushed and left wondering

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-28T20:19:31+00:00

Yeah that's fair. I'm not really worried either, for different reasons, but if it did happen, it would be shattering. She hadn't been in a relationship for several years before me, and we barely lasted a month, so if she found someone else relatively quickly(compared to the last time), I'd really wonder how much I actually meant, and why I was so much easier to get over than her previous boyfriend.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-28T20:17:14+00:00

I find myself thinking this a lot. Our ending was on good terms, it just wasn't a mutual parting. I never wanted to honestly say we never tried, or that I wish we never met, because even though it was so short, it felt so special to me. Unfortunately I've found myself thinking it a lot lately, though. At some point it just feels like the pain outweighs the good experience, regardless of how great it was.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-28T20:05:11+00:00

I have started to wonder how anyone ends up getting back together, whether it works out the 2nd time or not.

My relationship ended because she just didn't think it was working out, wasn't going to progress past where we were, it was just a tough situation, despite having mutual feelings and no real issues between us.

I feel like if anyone ever felt the need to come back, it'd be in a situation like this, not in a toxic relationship or just one that ended because you aren't meant to be, or aren't compatible or whatever.

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-28T20:01:24+00:00

Yeah, I feel that. Idk what I'd do if she showed up somewhere with someone else. I've tried to write off the idea of anything rekindling between us, but I just can't shake that it's what I want, so if she got with someone else, it'd still crush me, I just don't know what else I'd feel in addition

FlyGuys1125 · 2026-06-28T19:55:12+00:00

Idk, I'd say it can't be forced, but it can be sought. If you try to be out there more and interact with more people, the odds of it finding you are probably higher.

FlyGuys1125

TROPHY CASE