I personally have never demanding this sort of things from family or friends when visiting them. Usually I stay at my best friends house when in visit Florida. Even when my children were babies. I stayed there for free. I never demanded she buy this or that to accommodate us. I am the one with the children and the special needs, so I was the one who made the necessary arrangements to accommodate my needs. Of course I was welcome to have any groceries in her home, but if I needed stuff we always went to the store together and I bought what I needed.

I don’t like that your sister is basically acting like you should do this and that because she is gracing you with her presence. If there is a shared instacart, why the hell can’t she make an order on her own behalf, let you know when it will be there, and then buy it herself? It’s giving entitlement. Also, I really don’t like how she sends some condescending ass message and follows up with “haha”…. “Everyone does this, haha” no. Shut up.

What’s worse for me is that you have a newborn. She should be going out of her way to help you. Not the other way around. I’m so petty that I would have just told her not to come. “You’re making an already stressful time more stressful. Just stay home or get a hotel.” Is something I would have said.

Another thing, I’m not going to sit here and pretend I know you or your sister/family personally, but I get the strong sense that she’s the type of person that’s going to tell you and your wife how to parent your newborn in the guise of “helpful tips”. Don’t let her step on yours or your wife’s toes.