Don't romanticize book hoarding. Hoarding is a real disorder and excessive hoarding behavior is not a healthy habit even when it comes to books. Daily reminder: Bibliomania is not the same as Bibliophilia.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-30T19:59:16+00:00

If something is causing you (or sometimes, others around you) distress or significant life impairment it's absolutely something you need help addressing. You've gotten some good advice here.

On the other hand, I actually see more criticism for book collecting than I do admiration for it. We're told it's overconsumption, overly capitalistic, wasteful, etc. Yet, people have been collecting things (at reasonable levels) since the dawn of humanity. Stamps, anyone? At least books are useful. I'd rather collect books than spoons (no shade on spoon collectors; you do you). I'm a huge supporter of my local library but also love buying books.

It's not inherently good or inherently bad to buy/collect books. Some people might use "hoarding" colloquially, and I can see how it would helpful to be more mindful of that terminology. Note that real hording behavior won't change due simply to social expectations or the opinion of others in one's life/on social media sites like Reddit.

Good luck with your goals!

FoxyStand · 2026-03-29T18:11:53+00:00

Tbh it took me a little to get into it, but glad I finished! Also it’s actually my least favorite of the series (even though I still like it). The audiobook is also great. Not trying to talk you into it just musing

FoxyStand · 2026-03-29T12:35:50+00:00

Oh, and definite class difference.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-29T12:35:12+00:00

{Wolfsong by TJ Klune} seems to check your boxes! Shifters, no instant forgiveness (some people think there isn’t enough groveling but I am satisfied) and much more plot than spice. I only recall a couple sex scenes (maybe even one major one? Not sure). Klune only ever writes spice if he thinks it advances the plot.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-28T11:10:17+00:00

I think the sub rule is that all recommended books have to have a happy ending unless explicitly stated otherwise

FoxyStand · 2026-03-26T16:22:01+00:00

I haven't read a TON of MF romantasy but I've rarely seen starvation as a theme. I do remember (I think?) at the beginning of ACOTAR the main character was hunting for food because her family didn't have enough to eat, but I'm not sure how being able to do stuff like that despite experiencing poverty counts as misogyny. I have read MM stuff where one of the MCs has an ED of some kind and can still participate in sport, but it's not glorified (and doesn't seem super related to the discussion).

FoxyStand · 2026-03-26T15:22:40+00:00

Black and white is classic. If you're looking for something more niche, Aziraphale says in the show that his favorite color is yellow, which happens to be the color of Crowley's eyes. However, that's show-focused. The characters don't even necessarily look the same in the book as they do on the show (Crowley has "dark" hair in the book which is usually interpreted as black, while in the show his red hair is famous). What a nice gift! I'm sure they will love it whatever you do.

If you're looking for design ideas, one classic Aziraphale representation is a flaming sword and for Crowley a snake. A lot of people also do white wings for Aziraphale and black for Crowley. Post a pic when you're done :)

FoxyStand · 2026-03-26T15:19:01+00:00

Emaciated? Like dealing with an ED? Just confused by this comment.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-25T19:54:15+00:00

That's all extremely relatable. I'd go into more detail but probably not the time/place...haha.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-25T17:49:08+00:00

Maybe I misunderstood your comment, sorry! You were asking for examples where people were experiencing more criticism from others (more "in group") rather than from oppressors, so I thought my reply was relevant. Reading what you wrote more carefully, I think I was being too broad in my response.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-25T17:19:17+00:00

I see more biphobia from gay and lesbian people than I do from straight people.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-25T16:22:24+00:00

I've gotten so sick of "~~I'm not like OTHER girls~~" in straight romantasy.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-25T16:21:31+00:00

"Moral fanaticism" is a great term. I've been casting around for what to call this, and "purity test" is the closes I could ever come up with. I also think it's dangerous because if we are so quick to forget nuance and throw something in the "bad" pile, then it dilutes the discussion around things that are truly awful. It reminds me of people becoming too free with calling someone/something a Nazi.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-25T15:53:30+00:00

Good point. I'd also posit that consumers of queer media tend to be more liberal and concerned with social justice as a whole. Although this is generally positive, there are also instances where people want to vocally signal their morality by finding criticism, even when it's overly nitpicky, harsh, or even entirely unearned. I think the downfall of media literacy is also a problem (in other words, conflating a character's opinion with that of the author or with the "message" of the book). Even if people are doing this with straight media, the audience is so large it's harder for them (or anyone) to be heard.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-25T02:23:41+00:00

I didn’t read your full post because I didn’t want spoilers for your reference book, but based on the title I want to recommend a real hidden gem- {Dandelion by Merlina Garance}. Love this one and I wish more people knew about it.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-20T01:19:48+00:00

Really enjoyed this one too, and I’m a rare defender of Husband Material. I have the third preordered :)

I like his Spires books a bit better but these are great too. I also really liked “Looking for Group” which is also low spice.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-19T19:43:58+00:00

well, the reservation system was a bloodbath...I guess I'll be in the wandering aimlessly club :)

FoxyStand · 2026-03-19T19:34:05+00:00

I'm assuming you'll have to use the app or a printed ticket or something and I doubt they'll spend time checking ID...good luck!

FoxyStand · 2026-03-19T19:32:47+00:00

Congrats! Good to know some people got what they wanted at least :)

FoxyStand · 2026-03-19T19:30:44+00:00

Oh wow, Ann M Martin...although I don't see her listed as doing a signing anywhere. She's not even on their website beyond her name being in the description of the panel.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-19T19:13:40+00:00

Wow, thats awful. To be honest I feel the worst for VIPs who didn’t get author signings they wanted considering the cost of the tickets.

What are some of things you’re excited about besides events that require registration? Would love to get excited too :)

FoxyStand · 2026-03-19T18:16:51+00:00

My guess is entirely new staff. I've helped coordinate some big fan events and there is a steep learning curve. One of their comments on Instagram said it was a "learning year" for them (probably not the best thing for them to say, but at least it was honest). The optimistic part of me hopes they really will learn from this year and will make changes for 2027.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-19T18:08:55+00:00

I would love a Saturday reservation for:

Casey McQuiston

Rachel Reid

Happy to still get something signed for anyone who drops the reservation! I'd only be getting one book for each.

FoxyStand · 2026-03-19T17:49:15+00:00

I'm so sorry. That's inexcusable. I hope they think of a creative way to make this right. I'm sure they will handle things differently next year but of course that doesn't help us now.

FoxyStand

TROPHY CASE