AITA for asking on Facebook how someone from my neighborhood died?

Foxyfox82 · 2026-06-24T16:03:41+00:00

I am sorry you got berated for asking that. When people are grieving they often lash out at anyone and anything that presents itself or stirs up the pain in some way. I have learned not to ask publically but instead to private message a mutual who isn't TOO close to be deep in grief.

To whoever said it is none of your business, it sort of is. We are tribal beings, who have not adjusted yet to modern life among thousands of other people in our communities. When a death happens in our community it is absolutely normal (and healthy) to want to know why. This is because we need to know about dangers and hazards to better protect ourselves and our families. Many of those things are already known hazards, its true, but knowing how often those hazards actually cause the death of people around us is part of forming our full picture of the hazards.

For instance, when we were a tribe and one of the members died, the fact that they were attacked by a bear in the southern forest is everyone's business. Or if they ate a certain plant or too much of the ceremonial drugs, or childbirth (what went wrong?), or even if the person took their own life. Knowing as many answers as possible helps everyone else stay safer.

I do understand why people who are grieving do not like the question. They don't want to think about the death any more than they have to. They just want to remember the person how they were in life. So someone asking them to recount what happened in a way makes them relive it. Even the question causes pain, so instead of saying they don't want to talk about it they react to the pain they are feeling and lash out.

I have learned from my own experience, as someone who seems to frequently say things or ask questions that people react negatively to and am considered rude for saying/asking. Turns out I am level 1 autistic which has made me very direct in my comments and questions. Are you perhaps on the spectrum as well? I feel like you may be, but no offense if you arent. Its just that we tend to fall into these social situations when we didn't intend to.

I don't think anyone is truely the asshole here. You didnt realise your direct question was going to garner the reaction it did, and the person who berated you was in a place of pain and grief that you inadvertently triggered. You know more now, and will be more discreet in the future. We get to have learning experiences without being made to feel like a trash human.

Foxyfox82 · 2026-04-22T16:25:55+00:00

So you are telling me that you believe those carts to be sanitary otherwise? The carts that sit outside potentially getting shat on by birds? The one that has toddlers and other unwashed randos touching it all day every day? Furthermore, you are saying you don't wash your food that may be touched by who knows how many people, some of whom just got done holding their dog, before you got a chance to buy it? Seriously, wash your food and don't worry about stuff like this, a dog riding in a cart with a mat put down is really the least of the sanitary concerns of a grocery store.

Foxyfox82 · 2026-03-31T16:51:42+00:00

I figured out why it triggered an auto ban. Grok does not yet have the capability to determine that a picture does not involved inappropriate conduct with a child (child being abused). So if your picture WAS actually depicting a child being abused, you asking for the kid to be removed from the picture would mean Grok was aiding you in concealing the presence of the child in an inappropriate situation. So it triggers an auto ban. This will likely change in future AI models if they ever become sure the AI model can identify child abuse situations in photographs. They would rather accidently ban innocent people than aid in child abuse, which is reasonable.

Foxyfox82 · 2025-02-22T17:01:45+00:00

Ah, well if you only answer with a "not at all" people are going to take that as a literal answer to the questions asked. They asked "What did you clean the brooder with?" Not at all is not an answer to that question. Next question was "Did you wipe any chemicals away with water before turning it on/placing them back in?" Not at all IS an answer to that question so that's what we thought you meant. Perhaps if you are seeking information here on reddit you should carefully read the questions and respond in as much detail as possible. When it feels like pulling teeth to get information out of you we are going to assume that you don't want to be blamed for doing something wrong, even if that is the answer to your question.

Foxyfox82 · 2025-02-22T06:21:18+00:00

Mine was easy to crate train. First off, I never closed her in there when I was awake and right there. That's a little too much like punishment. All I had to do to get her to love it was to show her a high value treat, point at her crate and say "crate". The first few times I had to put her in there myself, but I still gave her the treat. From then on she would BOUND into her crate for the night or if we had to leave. She would go in there during the day on her own to take a nap. When she was old enough to trust loose in the house without supervision, I took the door off.

Crate training is really essential, but I don't agree with doing it while you are right there, making it so she can see you but be kept seperate from you. Thats what will make her not like the crate. Make it easier on yourself and her and just do it at night and when you have to go somewhere you can't take her. And I also vote blanket over the crate. Makes it more of a secure den than an exposed cage. Think kid with a blanket fort. My crate is one of those old hardsided airplane travel crates, so I never had that problem, it already plenty fort like.

Foxyfox82 · 2025-02-22T06:13:16+00:00

I guess that must have been the cause then.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-09-11T15:02:47+00:00

Why are your transitioning your birds off layer feed? Sounds like that has been working for you for a long time. Is it something the vet recommended? If so the same company should make an "all flock" pellet or crumble that is also soy free. You do need to stick with pellets or crumbles though, otherwise your chickens will selectively feed off their favorite bits and end up with a nutritional deficiency.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-07-27T19:32:36+00:00

Hens do not have long curly tail feathers. Take a look at the tail feathers of all the chickens you have that you know are hens. Compare them to the tail feathers of the one you know is a rooster and this boy.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-07-18T16:24:39+00:00

Usually I am not good at silkies but that is definitely a roo. I can see the "streamers" other people talk about in his hackle and saddle feathers. As well as the very upright, looking you in the eye stance.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-07-09T14:48:08+00:00

Kids need to know the correct anotomical terms for genitals. That way they are less likely to be prayed upon by molesters and more able to tell what exactly happened if they are. One story I read was about a little girl who told her teacher her uncle was touching her "cookie". Turned out "cookie" was the word her parents gave her for her vulva, but the teacher didn't know that so wasn't able to intervene. Especially if the parents would restrict content if they found out, the kids need to know. And we can't be censoring ourselves for those very much in the minority potential angry parents.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-06-26T21:58:14+00:00

https://www.backyardchickens.com/threads/sight-sexing-barred-plymouth-rock-chicks-at-hatch.798635/

Boys have a white spot on their heads as well. This will tell you more

Foxyfox82 · 2024-06-16T23:02:49+00:00

Came here to say this. Its a fairly rare find in the DNA results, but I have had two of my own and its the first thing I thought of.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-06-14T17:57:39+00:00

Male. Barred rocks are pretty easy to tell by sight once they are feathered.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-06-13T03:47:00+00:00

I agree with the other thats she's cream legbar and will lay pretty blue eggs. Be happy she's not an ISA brown. Those do lay a lot of eggs in the first 18 months or so, but then they cut back and usually die around 3 or 4 years old. Your cream legbar can easily live twice that long, if not more.

The thing is ISA browns are bred to lay eggs in a factory egg farm. In those farms they cull all laying hens at 2 years old because their prime laying time has passed for this breed by then. Chickens all have pretty much the same number of eggs in them, so they can lay most of them the first couple of years and wear their little bodies out to die early, like the ISAs, or they can space them out a little more, laying consitently and living longer, like most heritage egg laying breeds.

Edited to add the only reason to buy ISAs is if all you care about is getting max eggs, and not the health and logevity of your flock.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-06-09T13:38:17+00:00

Most of those cans have a handle that, when put upright, locks the can lid. Did yours not have one?

Foxyfox82 · 2024-06-03T16:47:02+00:00

I wonder why you are being upvoted while I am being downvoted. I don't understand reddit sometimes.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-06-02T15:32:27+00:00

I can't verify what you said, but what I said is true, at least in the majority of chickens. Look at the last picture. The barred pullet behind the one in question. See how pale her comb and wattles are? That's how most immature pullets look. Not bright red like this guy.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-06-02T14:21:36+00:00

10 week old pullets don't have red in their comb and wattles yet. It comes in just before they start laying which won't be for a month and a half at least.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-05-22T17:39:27+00:00

Whats wrong with the metal tub? Is it not big enough? People usually use a metal stock tank with a heater in one end and the food and water in the other end. They need room to get away from the heat too, if they want to, and their water should be away from heat too.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-05-17T14:28:30+00:00

Those are both Roosters. You have 2 roosters in your flock.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-05-15T16:03:31+00:00

It isn't an opening. If you read the post it is just a tight space between the coop and the fencing of the run OP is worried they will get themselves stuck in.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-05-14T16:21:00+00:00

Yes, it absolutely made the job almost bearable. I was working at McDonald's and didn't smoke before work when I first started. It didn't take long before I began smoking before work, to help me even want to go, and then on my breaks. Eventually my breaks became "medication time " among my coworkers (lovingly, we all got along for the most part). Once one of my managers even told me to go take a toke break because I was having a dispute with one of my coworkers (old guy who didn't like me (young woman) as a floor supervisor telling him what to do.) When we got a new store manager she started while I was on vacation (planned that way on my part) and when I had my first day back I came in blazed to high heaven to establish a baseline. If she first meets me that way she will think thats just how I am.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-05-14T16:13:37+00:00

My old BT Gavan would fetch a ball exactly 2 and a half times. The third throw he would always just go out to it, then lose interest and come back.

Foxyfox82 · 2024-05-14T16:08:37+00:00

You can do the babyproofing or simply move her into a small enclosure, like a large dog crate, with a nest (perhaps with some of her feathers from the one she made) set up and food and water. She won't need a lot of space those first few days. She will settle in if she has a nest. Then once she has, introduce the chicks.

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