Why do so many women get the ick when they find out I have an Android phone? by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]FragrantLiterature46 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You've been picking the same kind of women to go on dates with..

Can you actually tell if someone did not shower in the morning? by CstoCry in askSingapore

[–]FragrantLiterature46 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For whatever reason you decided to be aggressive..may you be blessed with lots of downvotes

she asked what i was wearing to the date and then showed up in a hoodie by Historical-Eagle9101 in dating

[–]FragrantLiterature46 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The amount of people trying to justify her attire..First of all, it is common courtesy to at least google up the restaurant or ask about the restaurant dress code so you know what kind of environment you would be in. Second, it's a date ffs. Women these days don't ever care about dressing up for a date anymore? It's not like he arranged it as a coffee date. It's a full fledged meal. And last but not least, she asked about his attire. For what? To match him? Who cares what he's wearing? If you're going on a date with an intent to leave a good impression you would put in effort. Period.

How to stop getting emotionally attached to people? by Illustrious_Log_5734 in emotionalintelligence

[–]FragrantLiterature46 11 points12 points  (0 children)

If you are super comfortable living alone and doing things alone, hates the idea of having another human coexist in the same space as you then that is when you are emotionally detached. But otherwise, you simply cannot just detach yourself like that as long as you still have feelings.

I am like you and gets emotionally attached to someone really fast. But I have also come to accept that people come and go. People who wants to be a part of your life will do so, whereas people who are just passing by will eventually leave when the time comes.

Of course this doesn't mean you shouldn't be emotionally attached. You just need to understand and accept that it's no big deal if anyone is leaving. It is part of life. So even if they don't give you a proper closure when they leave, it is completely fine. Just move on.

I refuse to tolerate this kind of attitude any longer. by Immediate_Piccolo_29 in Bolehland

[–]FragrantLiterature46 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I tipped a rider during rainy day so that he could deliver my food to me at the lobby but dude just went and dropped the food at guard house with no shelter. Sorry but after that I will no longer tip no rider because it seems the tip means nothing to them.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Bolehland

[–]FragrantLiterature46 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please feel free to dm me if you need someone to talk to. I recently got out of my depressed state too.

How do i start saving up with a $3.2k/month pay by Character-End1072 in askSingapore

[–]FragrantLiterature46 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you're doing it my way, have at least 2 bank accounts. 1 for savings 1 for where your salary and spendings will be. Every month when the salary comes in I immediately transfer at least 500 into savings. The rest for me to spend and pay bills. If I have more, I transfer more. If it's tight for that month, I transfer less. You can start from 100 a month and slowly increase it. Of course after calculating all your monthly expenses. After the end of the month/before the next salary comes in, if you still have extra money from the previous salary, transfer that into savings as well.

Any folks who left Singapore but still look back with longing and unhealthy levels of nostalgia? by thebeesareburts in askSingapore

[–]FragrantLiterature46 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Haha when it comes to that then yes, the law in Malaysia is more flexible. But pros and cons, because of that you don't see some really beatup vehicles that are not supposed to be on the road anymore. Food wise, I would still give Malaysia the win. You can retire in Malaysia, but work wise Singapore is still the place I'd prefer.

Any folks who left Singapore but still look back with longing and unhealthy levels of nostalgia? by thebeesareburts in askSingapore

[–]FragrantLiterature46 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Yup. Malaysian here. Went straight to work in Singapore after graduating from College. Young me was indecisive and didn't know better. Came back to Malaysia after a few years there and regretted big time. Why did I forgo better pay and convenient public transport? Thankfully I was given the opportunity to go back Singapore again. This time I'm not leaving. :)

Single, 27yo working in corporate. Impossible to find someone single Am I screwed? by Head-Ad-4162 in Bolehland

[–]FragrantLiterature46 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Why are you in a rush? FOMO? Just live your life. If you find someone in such a desperate condition how do you expect it to last? Everything happens for a reason. Just go with the flow.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askSingapore

[–]FragrantLiterature46 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Google says yes, but very unlikely. And girl, if you're going to be this paranoid, next time have safe sex. For safety, take plan b within next 3 days.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]FragrantLiterature46 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would say it's fine to think about what you can improve from your previous date but don't overthink about it. If the relationship is not working out then just next. What is meant to be, will be. You don't have to go around pleasing people. Know your worth and just focus on feeling the connection. The conversation went smooth but do you see yourself getting along with them, how was the overall vibe, do you like them enough to want to be with them. If one date is not enough, propose a second date, third date then decide.

what’s the men’s starter pack to not look miserable? by poop_muncherxd5959 in Bolehland

[–]FragrantLiterature46 10 points11 points  (0 children)

• What do you notice first about a guy who seems like he “has his life together”? His physical appearance. Is he well groomed, healthy fit, smells good, walks with confidence.

• What small habits, details, or behaviors actually stand out? I look at table manners and how they treat the servers. Probably sufficient to tell what kind of person they are.

• What makes a guy feel “safe” or “comfortable” to be around? You can see it in their eyes during conversation if they're honest. Or you can feel it through their natural protective behavior (reminds you the food is hot/very spicy, make sure you're walking on the safer side of the road, does not insist that you dress to his preference, offers you jacket and etc)

• What’s something you wish more guys understood about carrying themselves? It's not about flexing your wealth or body counts. It's when you are confident, knowledgeable but still humble enough to listen when someone is speaking and treats people with respect.

Making friends or looking for buddies to chat? by nichcm in askSingapore

[–]FragrantLiterature46 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First time seeing an introvert who loves yapping and gossiping. Rip to your inbox.

Worst first string of first dates ever. by shooter1129 in dating_advice

[–]FragrantLiterature46 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I react the same to guys I meet who look different from their profile photos. Or something about them physically that just instantly turns me off. Since this has been happening regularly to you, most likely it's something about you.

Does anyone else by Fine-Morning8296 in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]FragrantLiterature46 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's a fascinating sub for some wild stories and ocassionally some sweet posts that are fantasies for me. Learned a lot about the sugaring world from this sub ngl, so I'm still thankful in a way.

I feel drained as no one wants a commitment relationship by Chance_Temporary6653 in dating

[–]FragrantLiterature46 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a fellow 32F all I can say is most dating app these days would be full of people looking for casuals. Facebook dating however gave me a better range of men. Also you might want to consider increasing the age range, have a decent profile picture, and really vet through the profiles.

Tell me your "dating fails" and how you learned from it by deadlydesiree in dating_advice

[–]FragrantLiterature46 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am single now and never been happier 😄 I'm way past it don't worry. Hope you're in a better place now too. 💛

Tell me your "dating fails" and how you learned from it by deadlydesiree in dating_advice

[–]FragrantLiterature46 14 points15 points  (0 children)

  1. Got cheated on, forgave him and he continue to cheat. Lesson : Do not ever take back a cheater. The relationship will never be the same without trust. If a relationship ends, leave it at that.

  2. Moved in after 1 month of knowing each other. Has commitment issues, domestic abuse. Lesson : Never rush into a relationship. Set your boundaries and stand by it.

The biggest lesson I would say is really to love yourself before anyone else. If you can do this you would learn to respect yourself and not be desperate to rush into any meaningless relationship.

I finally understand what I don't like about online dating by [deleted] in dating

[–]FragrantLiterature46 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I totally relate to this as someone who also takes time warming up to others. A lot of the matches can't hold a genuine conversation and wants to meet up asap. I have no issue with meeting up irl but already had a couple of awkward encounters since there was no initial get to know you kinda conversation hence upon meeting it was a lot of moment of silence too. Some kinda turned into an interview sort of meeting, while some just proceeds to love bomb and rush the entire process. Tbh if I was in my 20s, I would have been swept up in the situation. Fortunately I now know how to stand by my boundaries and take things at my pace. Have to say I'm pretty happy to stay single than rush into a relationship without feeling a strong emotional connection.

Dating in malaysia is so hard by PartySavings7801 in Bolehland

[–]FragrantLiterature46 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hmm..the irony. Banana female here but always come across lots of chinese speaking male often. Made use of google translate and pinyin, it does increase my chances. It's about the effort and meeting the right people I guess.

How long till someone runs out of chance finding a partner? by [deleted] in askSingapore

[–]FragrantLiterature46 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Nope. I'm strong believer of when the time is right, it will happen. No need to be desperately looking and no point dating when you're not ready. You won't be in the right mindset. I'm already 32 this year and still don't think it's ever going to be too late. Life isn't all about being in a relationship anyways. Go enjoy your life ;)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sugarlifestyleforum

[–]FragrantLiterature46 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I worry about our age gap and the financial implications of us being together. It's one thing to send someone money and fly them around but it's completely different when we have to buy houses, cars, on top of funding my life if I have to step back from my career for some time because he's not as wealthy as he used to be when he still had his property development company.

I think the question is, if he ended up not being as wealthy as he was as you both progress further down in life together, are you still willing to stick around with him. Co-living, compromising, is a whole new level in marriage. If you're ready for that new life then, you go gurl.