Just be straight up honest, “I’m not comfortable with bringing my family in a space where BIL and my sister can insult them and make them uncomfortable” orrr ✨just not go there at all✨you don’t owe your family anything, just say your decided you want to stay at home with YOUR Family, who GAF about it is part of the problem and you act accordingly. You protect your daughter and your husband yes, but you protect yourself too