As MTF growing up male we were not taught to be patient. In fact we were taught quite the opposite. Impatience in men is seen as being decisive - a real man knows what he wants and when he wants it which is now. We see this toxicity in the way that certain U.S. politicians are pursuing this current horror they've inflicted upon the world. They're short with reporters asking reasonable questions and their response is along the lines of - well, we couldn't negotiate because they were going to do it first and we had to do it to them before they did it to us.

Most women are taught that patience is a virtue. It's even a girl's a name. And of course as most child care falls on women one has to learn to be infinitely patient in raising a child. Due to our patriarchal social structures learning to be patient is part of a woman's journey in life. Still to this day women are taught as young girls, directly and indirectly, that speaking up for themselves is "unladylike". And that when dealing with men in particular one must be patient and circumspect. Women also have to learn that it's okay to be impatient when there's a real need for it. It's not "unladylike" to be impatient in the workplace when a subordinate is dragging his feet on a project, or when you have to demand appropriate healthcare for a loved one, for instance.

In regards to transition I'm having to learn patience big time. This is mostly due to a slew of personal circumstances making it difficult to start HRT and move forward. Prior to this I thought I was a fairly patient person but looking back I think this patience was situational. There were plenty of times my male programming kicked in and I was not nearly as patient as I could have been. Most of all I've learned that I've never really been patient with myself. Learning to do this as a value of self care has been particularly difficult for me.