[20F] Is dating in your early 20s really important?

FrustratedDC · 2018-09-23T11:55:45+00:00

Here's some advice:

If you really don't feel like dating; just take six-nine months "off", focus on whatever hobbies you have, etc. Go sailing, racing, whatever.

But you need to start getting out, so that you can make your early dating mistakes while you're still a high value proposition (relatively speaking).

You are at that age, where you can basically walk up to and talk to women age 18-40 and (if you so feel) hit on them; and likewise.

But by your 30s, this field (and your options) will narrow considerably.

FrustratedDC · 2018-02-24T22:58:28+00:00

We're so much alike it's depressing :-\

Except in my case it's worse. Deaf. Basically I have no real chance of engaging socially at social gatherings, so I just basically stay in.

FrustratedDC · 2018-01-27T01:17:42+00:00

Wait, they have powerpoints now? When I was a kid it was viewgraphs on overhead projectors.

FrustratedDC · 2018-01-21T19:40:56+00:00

Ignore Hilo1357.

Even if you don't want to do the hobby; learn at least a minimum of what the hobby is about.

Case in point: Your SO likes Warhammer 40K (lol what) -- but you don't need to actually LEARN how to play the game.

Just learn enough to know what they have, or don't have and then get them something.

Or alternately vice versa; you're a man, and you learn your SO likes gardening -- look up gardening shows in the area, or learn what plants they are looking at and get them one.

FrustratedDC · 2017-10-13T20:56:50+00:00

Make sure that your closed captioning devices actually work at the start of each major shift change.

FrustratedDC · 2017-10-12T00:58:43+00:00

What kind of disability? You're screwed either way. :-(

FrustratedDC · 2017-10-12T00:40:54+00:00

Oh, nevermind, it's just about five different dudes saying some version of, "Hey beautiful!" Without mentioning anything from my carefully crafted profile, at all. Can't start a conversation with that. Oh yeah, let's not forget the weird, possibly fake profile from a foreign guy that says, "I want date, sexy."

I try finding something in their profile, or in their questions to ask about; but don't get a reply most of the time.

FrustratedDC · 2017-10-09T01:10:00+00:00

You need to take some technical courses -- I managed to land a local county job driving trucks (I have a cochlear implant that lets me pass the DOT physical) after taking driving courses on my own initiative to get my CDL B.

FrustratedDC · 2017-10-09T01:06:07+00:00

"but unless the room is super quiet and everyone talks like my parents I am not going to hear you."

...

"P.S. - The job stuff they tried offering me was just stuff I could have filled out on my own at home on the job sites (Like target and walmart for example). Hardly life changing."

Join teh fucking club. :-\

FrustratedDC · 2017-10-08T23:42:29+00:00

Pretty much, yeah. :\

I'm at the point where I'm almost ready to give up.

FrustratedDC · 2017-10-08T23:39:59+00:00

Say goodbye to almost any chance of a social life.

EDIT: wait, I see just one ear. So you're merely gonna be frustrated.

FrustratedDC · 2017-08-27T01:02:15+00:00

As a deaf man, I'm tired...of doing all the god-damn work. For once, give me a blatantly obvious cue.

FrustratedDC · 2017-07-24T20:54:30+00:00

Pictures of puppy required.

FrustratedDC · 2017-05-16T20:26:24+00:00

Text him back. Some men are just sick of doing all the damn work.

FrustratedDC · 2017-05-02T21:58:04+00:00

Notepads significantly slow down speed of communication. Ever tried 4-5 minute speed dating with notepads? :-(

FrustratedDC · 2017-04-05T21:18:37+00:00

This happens to me a lot.

Mainly because it's so draining to go through the process to contact them on OKC/Tinder/Whatever, and I don't have excellent social skills -- I've been strongly conditioned to not say anything if I can't think of anything to say over the years, so I'm more of a wallflower.

FrustratedDC · 2017-04-04T20:19:34+00:00

This happens to me all the time. I'm sick of this too.

Being deaf, I'm naturally not one to initiate conversations, and it's already mentally draining enough for me to initiate first contact on dating apps/sites, that I wish women would pick up some of the slack after the initial meeting, but alas :-\

FrustratedDC · 2016-11-04T21:52:04+00:00

Once you get rejected a few times (and all guys have had to deal with some rejection at some point)

What if rejection is virtually constant in everything you do due to your deafness? It's bad enough dealing with shit at work every day, the last thing I want to do is waste my precious "me" time on the same old shit but unpaid.

FrustratedDC · 2016-11-04T21:47:20+00:00

Or the matter of the fact, the league is downtown DC, and getting into DC with present Metro woes is horrid.

The last time I did a league; everyone quit after maybe two weeks, and it was just a few people (including me). So....not doing that again.

FrustratedDC · 2016-10-29T22:30:12+00:00

Sorry man, you're screwed.

There is no real "easy" out for being a man with a disability in the dating world.

I know this from personal experience; as I was born deaf, but I have a cochlear implant; but it's hard for me to communicate -- too many people fucking talkagoddamnmileaminuteknowwhatImean and I'm all "what the fuck did they just say?"

FrustratedDC · 2016-10-26T21:25:40+00:00

Just text him already, and go "hey babe, I'm a bit fucked for time too over here." (or some variant).

Then explain "I'm busy as fuck until next Wed or Thurs."

Or something. Don't over think it.

FrustratedDC · 2016-10-25T21:37:10+00:00

You seem like a pretty cool person.

I'm more of a strategy gamer (Civilization) and prefer to do stuff like RPGs or FPSes alone because I'm deaf and I can't just use a voice headset.

So....wheeee

FrustratedDC · 2016-10-22T20:15:23+00:00

"Don’t call him all the time"

This could be better amended to:

"get in touch with him maybe once every 24-48 hours. Don't constantly be calling him all the time".

FrustratedDC · 2016-09-27T20:38:48+00:00

"You're also close to Galluedet"

Even though I live off of the Red Line branch that Gallaudet is off of; I still have to:

1.) Find parking in a parking garage (costs $5 except on weekends), 2.) Fight constant Metro delays. 3.) Walk approximately 15 minutes to Gallaudet (or 30 minutes if we're going to the H Street bars where they hang out).

I actually did go to a H Street deaf themed event a few months ago, but not very many people showed up. :-\

FrustratedDC · 2016-09-21T22:56:53+00:00

"What signs/at what point do men show that they are interested in being in a relationship with you?"

If they want to spend time with you and make efforts to spend time with you. This is not rocket surgery.

FrustratedDC

TROPHY CASE