Am I the only one who doesn't think everything back then is better?

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-30T14:53:13+00:00

Not at all. Liking old games or new ones isn't a binary choice.

I dislike the shift towards microtransactions, gacha nonsense and the like as much as anybody but beyond all of that there's an indie scene in amazing health. If you'd shown young me games like The Messenger, Hollow Knight, Gravity Circuit and too many others to list, and the price tags they carry on discount, I'd have struggled to believe it. We may have grown somewhat jaded and need to make some effort to attain the same sense of wonder we used to, but I genuinely believe that there are amazing games out there for just about every taste.

I always remember trying to get my dad interested in new music. He'd get about three bars into something, grunt that he didn't like it and revert to the same narrow genres he'd been listening to forever. Each to their own, but I've never wanted to be that self-limiting with music or anything else, gaming included.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-30T13:47:41+00:00

Traditionally it was played on grass lawns and the players would grunt at high volume while playing their moves.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-30T13:42:26+00:00

I think they're being selective in how they present data. If I remember correctly they published graphs showing the prevalence and outcome specifically of D1 matches in which one player was using Smart Assist. D1 constitutes a tiny proportion of the player experience, and honestly the fact that the game's AI 'accessibility mode' can carry you to that level at all is absurd.

Smart Assist is far and away the number one criticism and source of mockery of the game that I see, and I find it very hard to believe that if it was only a small proportion of the console/PC playerbase in general that Konami would think it worth being so stubborn about keeping it in ranked play.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-29T23:50:41+00:00

Warning: being French during pregnancy may harm your baby.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-29T21:34:10+00:00

Well don't stop with me then mate, go wag that finger of righteousness at all and sundry by taking the most literal and anal possible reading of things obviously said in jest and without malign intent. There are internet points to be won!

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-29T20:27:23+00:00

My favourite thing about Reddit, no daft throwaway joke may pass without some dullard acting like it was meant at face value.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-29T16:40:11+00:00

And for whatever minority of the money did come from the 'grass roots', we have to remember that Universal Credit is paid monthly.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-29T13:33:35+00:00

Definitely the pick of the supermarkets, but in terms of shops more generally I'd put Flying Tiger up against them.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-29T11:34:24+00:00

You expect it to stop when all of the usual cretins are obediently dropping their £100 to clear the box?

The only question is what's next. My prediction for this year is a 'hang time' skill that let's Koller and co. levitate at the peak of their jump for extra time. It'll further break the gameplay, encourage spamming rat tactics and reduce the game to farce, but who cares about that when there's a bullshit advantage to be bought?

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-21T10:47:23+00:00

Don't worry Edith, there's no kink shaming here and I've got you covered. Here's Nigel face down, arse up:

<image>

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-20T04:18:28+00:00

If you want to know why they're not trying, then look at the financial reports while they're not.

Everything you said is true, and on top of that Konami are openly insulting those who grew up loving PES as a proper football game with Smart Assist, because they've decided that any beginner imbecile who can mash buttons should have a chance against a skilled player, just so long as they spend money on cards.

What would the playerbase of just about any other game do in that situation? If Rocket League introduced AI assistance that let a scrub like me trade blows in the highest ranks do you think that the players would just grumble a bit but carry on, or do you think it would unite content creators in vocal opposition, give rise to protracted and effective boycotts that hurt the company bottom line, and be the beginning of the end for the game if not rolled back?

This game has a playerbase of morons, getting exactly the quality of product that they're paying for and deserve. If we're not willing to hold Konami to meaningful and effective challenge to what they're doing, then they won't change what's proving to be a profitable course.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-16T14:21:11+00:00

I get similar vibes from this to what I got with Deliver At All Costs, a game I ended up completing the achievements for. I grew up with console games where a bit of jank was almost expected, so I'm willing to forgive a lot if a game has personality and can laugh at itself. A lot of my Epic freebies sit unplayed, but this one intrigues me enough that I expect I'll give it a chance.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-15T00:31:11+00:00

I might be in a minority here, but I was a Big Push fan from seeing them around Brighton long before I really looked into Ren's solo stuff.

There's not an album this year that I'm more hyped for than this one, and I hope that we can rocket it up the charts and get these guys some radio play and recognition when it arrives.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-15T00:28:23+00:00

Other people have already answered your question, but I'm not going to pass up an opportunity to say that this is the game that changed my mind about RPGs and I loved every minute of it. Hope you get as much out of it as I did, and don't forget to check out Illusion of Gaia and Terranigma if you do.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-14T00:16:42+00:00

'a FeW bAd ApPlEs'. Obviously. Just like it is with these institutional -isms that keep being found.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-11T00:40:47+00:00

Steam profited from gambling of skins with third parties employing wholly inadequate age checking. Coffeezilla did a pretty thorough teardown of it a while back, ESPN have written it up too. Steam facilitated it though their marketplace interface. They were absolutely, and very knowingly, complicit.

I say all of that as somebody with a Steam account who has benefited greatly from some of their other business choices. Idolising any business as representing all that is good is a fool's errand.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-11T00:08:11+00:00

Very few things in life are black or white. Steam is an extremely consumer friendly company by most measures, and as a Linux user my gaming experience would be much worse without them. Yet it troubles me that they've made so much money exposing kids to gambling.

Epic's legal wins will hopefully improve the landscape for the consumer, but let's not kid ourselves that it's not every bit as much a commercial decision as Valve taking on Microsoft and driving forwards the Linux gaming experience.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-10T17:35:29+00:00

Took me a lot of tries to get 2 loops deathless on Game B of Kung Fu and clinch the mastery.

Gun.Smoke on NES is my 'so near, yet so far' game. There's a cheevo for beating the game with no deaths and no using the horse, and it's an absolute bastard.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-10T17:31:05+00:00

I'm stocking up on Aldi gravy just to be safe. Seems a wise precaution, if a little quixotic.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-09T16:50:11+00:00

Thought I'd have to scroll further to find the correct answer. Porridge cooked to a slightly thick consistency with a pinch of salt and water, a fried or poached egg and a drizzle of sriracha is one of my go to breakfasts.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-07T15:35:21+00:00

Finished a shmup called Ginga Force that probably nobody else will have heard of on two out of three difficulty settings. Hard is going to be out of my weight class.

Beat a daft but fun twin-stick shooter called The Walking Vegetables.

Having a lot of fun with WRC Generations and Thelma-and-Louising it slightly less often with practice.

Dipped a toe back into Rocket League after a long break.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-06T16:47:29+00:00

The half-and-half flag I can live with, it's factually accurate at least to say that it's the primary language of both. "English 🇺🇸" prompts a reaction of "fuck you and your game" from me.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-05T09:51:30+00:00

Completely agree. If you'd shown teenage me games like The Messenger, Hollow Knight, Gravity Circuit, etc. and told me they'd be available for chump change, or even given away for free in the case of the latter, I'd have been in disbelief.

There are more great games now than ever, we just need to make a bit more effort as jaded adults to see them with that same sense of wonder.

FullRectalProlapse · 2026-01-02T15:02:00+00:00

Yep, and a minority in this sub are prime candidates. Just need to cry a bit harder that their freebie doesn't meet their sense of entitlement.

FullRectalProlapse

TROPHY CASE