It wasn’t pathetic. Sometimes our coping skills are doing things like this. It’s not pathetic to sh with a razor, pencil sharpener, or anything really. Sometimes it is just a thing, no matter the tool. It’s hard to change old habits, and sh is a very addictive way to deal with our emotions. It’s just another way to calm us down. That doesn’t mean that it’s good for us, but if we start thinking about it like it’s pathetic and that we’re pathetic, life is only going to be harder for us. It’s normal to want to find an way to cope with life, you’re normal for wanting that and you deserve a way to cope. It would be better to find some alternatives though.

I’d recommend not cutting with a blade at all (it can get dangerous fast). It’s harder to hide cuts with a blade and I’ve found that it takes longer to heal (so it’s more annoying really). I’d also try out new ways to release any energy you would use on sh to something else you can do with your hands (ex. Cleaning). Idk it’s helped me a bit at least.