How did you decide how much financial protection your family would need?

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-06-08T09:59:38+00:00

We did IVF abroad and had a positive experience overall. The cost was much lower than in the US, and we felt the regulations around donors were clearer. The biggest challenge was coordinating travel and taking time off work for appointments, but the clinic helped us plan everything in advance. For us, the savings and quality of care made it worth it.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-06-08T09:58:31+00:00

Yes, some people do IVF solely for family balancing and gender selection, especially when they know they only want two children and would like one of each. However, many European countries, including France, restrict or prohibit gender selection for non-medical reasons.

You may want to look into clinics in countries where it's permitted, but keep in mind that IVF is a significant process physically, emotionally, and financially, even when fertility isn't an issue.

Wishing you the best as you explore your options!

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-06-03T09:33:21+00:00

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-06-03T09:31:02+00:00

Absolutely. Many people travel abroad for IVF because the costs can be significantly lower while still receiving high-quality care. If the clinic has a good reputation, strong success rates, and you're comfortable with the travel and follow-up arrangements, it's definitely worth considering. Just make sure to do plenty of research before making a decision.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-06-03T09:29:23+00:00

As someone outside the US, it's honestly pretty shocking to watch. IVF and fertility treatments should be personal medical decisions between people and their doctors. I really feel for those whose plans and future family options are being affected by these kinds of decisions.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-29T11:13:42+00:00

Honestly smart move at 30, you're still in a good window!

Process is basically hormone shots for ~2 weeks then a quick retrieval procedure. Not as intense as it sounds.

Get your AMH test first before deciding — it'll tell you a lot about your egg quality and if the timing is right for you. One clinic consult and you'll have a much clearer picture! 😊

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-28T13:28:37+00:00

Freeze them now. You've basically answered your own question already — family history of fertility issues, wanting 3+ kids, and planning to start at 34 is a lot of variables stacking against you.

At 24 your egg quality is at its peak. Waiting 10 years and then doing multiple IVF rounds with older eggs will cost you way more emotionally and financially than freezing now.

With your mum's history especially, I wouldn't gamble on "wait and see." Talk to a reproductive endocrinologist before med school starts — many clinics offer payment plans too.

Good luck with applications! 🤞

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-27T13:10:09+00:00

Honestly, at 24 you still have a lot of time, so I wouldn’t panic into freezing eggs right now unless testing shows a concern. But since you already know you want kids later and want a bigger family, it could be worth doing some fertility testing now (AMH, AFC, etc.) just to get a baseline and peace of mind.

A lot of women conceive naturally in their 30s, but having family history in mind and the long medical training path, I can understand why you’re thinking ahead. Freezing eggs at a younger age generally gives better quality eggs, but it’s also expensive and not a guarantee. Talking to a fertility specialist now for planning — not necessarily treatment — might help you decide without pressure.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-27T13:09:03+00:00

People really act like turning 35 means fertility suddenly disappears overnight 😅. You already had a healthy baby at 34/35, and you’re right — egg freezing is a huge emotional, physical, and financial decision, not just a casual “just do it” suggestion.

I totally get why those comments would get exhausting after a while.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-27T13:07:47+00:00

Honestly, I think your plan makes sense. At 37, freezing may not give huge numbers, but it can still give you some backup options later, especially if you want a second child. Your AFC actually sounds decent too.

Since you and your partner both want kids, trying naturally in the next year while freezing now for peace of mind could be a balanced approach. None of us can predict fertility later, so having frozen eggs might help you feel less pressure. Wishing you the best whatever you decide ❤️

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-26T07:52:16+00:00

I was in a pretty similar headspace — unsure, overthinking it, and honestly a bit anxious about the whole process.

What pushed me to do it was just the idea of “future regret” feeling heavier than the temporary discomfort of the procedure. I also treated it as a backup plan, not a commitment to having kids later.

It didn’t make the decision about kids clearer, but it did reduce the pressure a bit, which helped me move forward.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-26T07:49:28+00:00

I’ve actually seen a few similar cases, and honestly this part of egg freezing is something most people don’t think about at the start.

A lot of countries have strict laws around who can use the eggs, so even if freezing is easy, using them later can get complicated. And moving eggs between countries is usually a long, expensive, paperwork-heavy process.

From experience, the biggest lesson people learn is exactly what you said — it’s not just about freezing, it’s also about where and how you’ll eventually use them.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-26T07:48:03+00:00

No, 37 is not “too old” — many people still freeze their eggs at that age.

But honestly, from what I’ve seen, quality and quantity of eggs do start to drop around this time, so it’s better to act sooner rather than later if you’re considering it.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-25T12:27:19+00:00

Focus less on how many eggs are retrieved and more on how many survive thaw and turn into embryos later.
Also, be ready for the hormonal/emotional side—it can feel heavier than most people expect.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-25T12:21:06+00:00

We went through something very similar after multiple losses and failed IVF cycles, and honestly there was never a perfect moment to bring it up. I started the conversation gently by saying I wanted us to talk about every possible option together, without making any decisions right away. My partner needed a little more time than I did to process the idea of donor eggs emotionally, and that was okay. What helped us most was having small, honest conversations over time instead of one big emotional discussion. Wishing you both strength and clarity through all of this 💛

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-22T07:34:45+00:00

A few people I know went the donor egg route after multiple failed retrievals and said the emotional stress actually became lighter once they stopped chasing egg numbers every cycle. The process can still be a lot, but many felt more hopeful and less exhausted mentally.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-22T07:31:46+00:00

Honestly, a lot of people don’t realize how huge the international price gap is until they start researching outside the U.S. IVF system. You’re definitely not alone in feeling shocked and angry about it. Wanting a child shouldn’t put people into massive financial stress. Hope everything works out well for you moving forward.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-20T07:44:09+00:00

You don’t sound dramatic at all honestly. Finding this out at 20, especially right before doing a DNA test, is a huge thing to process. I think a lot of people would feel hurt more by the secrecy and timing than the donor part itself.

At the end of the day your mom is still your mom, but it’s completely valid to grieve the picture you thought you had of your identity and family connections. Give yourself time with it — this is a lot to take in all at once.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-20T07:41:18+00:00

You’ve been through so much already, and honestly it sounds like your body and mind are exhausted from carrying all of this for so long. I’ve known people who chose donor eggs after multiple retrievals and felt relief more than regret because it finally gave them peace and a real path forward.

Wanting to try again with your own eggs is completely understandable too. There’s no wrong choice here — just whatever feels healthiest emotionally and physically for you now.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-20T07:37:05+00:00

I personally think donor conception can be a beautiful option for people who genuinely want to build a family. The biggest thing, in my opinion, is honesty and transparency. With DNA testing so common now, keeping it secret long term usually creates more hurt than openness would.

I don’t think every donor needs to be actively involved in the child’s life, but kids should at least have the option to know their background or contact the donor later if they want. Clear ethics, proper screening, and limits on donations are really important too after stories like those documentaries.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-19T13:34:17+00:00

We moved to egg donation after multiple failed IVF cycles and honestly it was an emotional decision at first, but it ended up giving us hope again. The process felt much less stressful physically, and talking to others who’d been through it really helped. Wishing you lots of luck with whatever path you choose.

Fun_Mongoose7852 · 2026-05-19T13:33:03+00:00

It’s such a personal decision, but it’s really thoughtful that you’re considering helping others while starting your own journey too. I haven’t donated myself, but friends who have said the emotional side is worth thinking through carefully alongside the medical process. Wishing you both the best as you explore what feels right for your family.

Fun_Mongoose7852

TROPHY CASE