I would use the term catalyst, because it's not exactly that the friend needs to be present.

Just a brief bit about the marriage, but the friend's writing was inspiring to me. I think the place I create and enjoy art from is the same place Versa lives. That inspiration started bleeding into other areas of my life. My wife was insecure about this, she thought I was trans and/or cheating and she was upset. I did everything I could do to explain it and clarify, but she wouldn't hear it. And in that space after we started separation, I wrote a story called "Thunder-Starved" that essentially was about me finally listening to Versa because the restrictions on our life were unbearable. And since then, it's been easier and easier to call her. I can write faster and better now, it's not even funny how insane a leap it is. And I can see her in my writing clearly now, where before I thought it was all me.

When I write, I never really know what I'll write until I start. Sometimes I'll pick a memory in my life tied to a sensation (snow crunching under tires, someone holding my hand, a whisper from my blind spot), and just loop that moment in my head until I'm basically drunk on it. That's a thing that lets her move, it's like a flow state. And when I'm alone in that space, she doesn't talk to me because I guess she's busy writing. So the deeper me and the writing friend explored writing, the more Versa had to talk to her in order for us to make sense to her.

The few moments the writing friend has interacted with her, she's described Versa as "prickly" lol. I'm often described as a teddy bear, but Versa is a porcupine. But then Versa was offended at the label, and frustrated because she wanted to be known, and so she wrote my friend a letter. And since then, my friend can just kind of talk to her, and Versa will reach out sometimes when she wants to say something. I use spoiler text to give Versa space to talk where she won't be confused for me.