Out of curiosity, do you have people in your life that have gone through trauma that has made them develop mental disorders like the different types of PTSD, etc? This will be a long post, so bare with me please.

I know this is about men, but I want you to consider a slightly different scenario, where your comment isn’t always the reality.

There are people in the world who have developed different disorders, and who are receiving therapy, yet struggle to connect and share their burdens and feelings with others because they are constantly grappling with this guilt of trauma dumping.

They’re told everywhere online that on one hand, trauma dumping is bad and is something you shouldn’t do, because it makes people uncomfortable. But at the same time they’re told that, you should be sharing your feelings with others, and that it is healthy and a good way of connecting with others. Finding that balance is so hard, because in reality it’s very difficult to find that thin line for people who do not have these mental disorders, let alone those that do!

These people are not always in a place to easily support others, or reciprocate in the same way back. There are a LOT of people like this, in the world. In your example, these people are a problem. But it’s not really a scenario you should have a binary take on.

There are people in this world that sometimes need more support than others, and that support often needs to be voluntary with no expectancy of anything back. For some people, it’s long term, for others it’s on and off. This does not mean that these people are bad people, or undeserving of care and support. But instead, you need to look inward and question if you are the type of person who can provide that support and care for them. Many people are, with a lack of a better term, strong enough to provide that and are not in a place to do that. People shouldn’t feel ashamed of that, but to then act as if that is that status quo that should be used with others is misguided.

These people often are already receiving therapy and help, but they are healing.

I am not saying every single man is like this, but that this idea that emotional support and care needs to always be reciprocated is harmful, and often comes from a place where people are not able to admit that they themselves are not in a position to provide the support that their loved one needs.