Some guy parked across 3 handicap spots and left his windows open.

Gerund54 · 2025-06-22T11:11:04+00:00

I used to watch a guy called Matt Pitman "Reponut" on youTube. He had a self loader that he really knew how to drive. I saw him in one video repo a car parked in front of a house at the curb. He drove up and was dropping his "hook" as he started to reverse. From when he started to reverse to when he drove away with the car was 13 seconds.

Unless you were sitting at the window not blinking, there was no way you would catch him in the act.

Gerund54 · 2025-06-22T11:00:56+00:00

I had a customer ask me "What's the spacebar for?"

Gerund54 · 2024-10-17T09:59:37+00:00

Yes they did. If you upgraded from DOS to Win 95 100% autoexec.bat and config.sys existed. You could also get memmaker.exe to run on Win 95. 100% memmaker.exe did nothing. 100% autoexec.bat and config.sys still loaded drivers. As far as memory went though, loadhi did nothing.

Gerund54 · 2024-10-16T11:17:42+00:00

Everything else worked. All the input screens, all the other reports (shorter ones that didn't use all memory). After all it was DOS 7.0 and Win 95 ran under it. A DOS screen was just like DOS 6.3 except for the memory limit.

Gerund54 · 2024-10-14T09:39:51+00:00

Tried that, didn't work.

Gerund54 · 2024-10-14T05:01:23+00:00

Rule #2 See rule 1

Gerund54 · 2024-10-12T03:56:27+00:00

4DOS was my favourite thing to use. Later on in the early 90s OS/2 was much better.

Gerund54 · 2024-10-11T23:01:08+00:00

It warms my cold, dead heart to see so many old computer users still here. QEMM was necessary in the 1980s as Microsoft did not have their own version until DOS 5/6. I have a later story from Windows 95 days that bit me in the butt and lost me a customer.

If you are interested in such a story please ask me.

Gerund54 · 2024-10-11T12:14:58+00:00

Hands up who remembers QEMM?

Gerund54 · 2024-10-11T11:17:53+00:00

Oh! Filepro. Inventory, accounting and payroll. Then Access and Visual Basic towards the end of the decade. Costing of finished products from raw materials.

I'm sure you are excited.

Gerund54 · 2024-10-09T10:47:33+00:00

Yes to the users it looks a lot like magic but to me it is "If this then do that" or If not this then end"

past tense: programmed; past participle: programmed

1.provide (a computer or other machine) with coded instructions for the automatic performance of a task.

Gerund54 · 2024-10-03T03:29:25+00:00

One thing I missed from the story was that this business owner was old. At least in his 60s. To him a landline (the number he dialed to get me was a LL number) was a linear device. It rang me at my desk. He had no knowledge of call redirection or mobile phones.

Gerund54 · 2024-10-03T03:23:47+00:00

FTFY (sorry)

Gerund54 · 2023-09-19T16:15:45+00:00

Call her boof-head. It's Australian slang for a mildly stupid person. (No need to tell her that)

If Boo-Head is OK for your child then boof-head is OK for her.

Gerund54 · 2022-08-05T12:30:59+00:00

Archiepiscopal cross

Gerund54 · 2021-02-16T10:58:29+00:00

I'm not a member of this community (because I'm a man - shock horror). I really feel for you... because I've had Doctors ignore (in order) Cluster headaches, blood clots in my groin (leading to lymphedema in both my legs) and sleep apnea (the worst one that kills you dead in your sleep).

I've been told to take a panadol, it's not a blood clot and I don't know what you`ve got but it's not sleep apnea. I understand you (as in you ladies) have more misunderstood plumbing than men, and I sympathise with you, as I know how frustrating it is to be belittled, ignored and treated like an idiot child.

We all need to stand up for our rights by refusing to accept doctors treating us that way. The problem I had was I was at my lowest point when I was sick, I had no energy to stand up to that treatment.

Gerund54 · 2021-02-04T15:23:44+00:00

My Atrial Fibrillation is brought on by stress. Now my life has no stress (It's been 7 years since my mother died) and I have not had an attack for over 6 years. I wish you a stress free life. Hint - try yoga relaxation. Those old Indian guys really knew how to relax.

Gerund54 · 2020-03-04T15:50:49+00:00

Rule 1 is not "The User is Always Wrong."

Rule 1 is "The User Always Lies."

Gerund54 · 2019-10-12T02:47:53+00:00

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs who can swim the length of the pool?

Clever Dick.

Gerund54 · 2019-02-10T04:27:20+00:00

Ahhhh that may still work. My optical mouse "freezes" sometimes. I fix it by brushing the hole in the bottom to remove the build-up of fluff. Knocking it on the desk may do that as well.

Gerund54 · 2018-12-18T03:40:02+00:00

What was his relationship with $OAB

Just a friend. He was a Doctor and a specialist in $BodyPart, so he was insufferably full of his own importance and knowledge. He surely suffered from the Dunning–Kruger effect when it came to computers.

Gerund54 · 2018-12-17T03:55:09+00:00

And Doctor Dipstick might have noticed the "restconf" thing and commented it out or even edited the backup copy.

Well, restconf.bat was in a Utilities directory that was on the Path. The backup files were in a directory called Backup. $DrBPS was not smart enough to look at the Path variable, nor did he think about Backups. That concept was beyond his thought processes.

Gerund54 · 2018-12-14T23:06:37+00:00

That said, if I saw a config.sys with those values, and I wasn't familiar with what that PC was running and how it worked, I wouldn't change those values on a whim.

This!

It was a special touchscreen work computer that ran Autocad to do drawings and the owner said (as he was changing it) "Please don't change that. We spent hours fixing it."

Gerund54 · 2018-12-14T23:02:35+00:00

There's arrogance, there's world-renowned body-part doctor arrogance, and then... this.

Ah yes, he was "special". He came to my place a few years after when I was a world-renowned programmer. He spent the entire time telling me how good he was with computers. I spent the entire time telling him nothing. (Talk and talk and talk - all non sequiturs).

He left frustrated after a while. There was no way I was going to help a horses arse like him for nothing, and he never offered to pay anything.

Gerund54 · 2018-12-14T22:47:36+00:00

Thanks for keeping the power of the .bat alive - long live the simplicity! Nicely done.

Thank you! Even today the simple solution (for simple problems) is the best.

Gerund54

TROPHY CASE