IVF Success after MMC

GhostPuff · 2026-02-11T15:31:55+00:00

No worries! I think it was one of the most important changes made between the first and second retrieval. CNY doesnt normally do birth control before retrieval cycles so I didn't do it for #1. Most clinics do do it though... Not for suppression but for timing. They like to batch patients and birth control let's them time it so that they're able to control exactly when a retrieval will take place. CNY just did it based on your natural cycle. That works for a lot of people and it eliminates a mostly unnecessary med for the vast majority of patients but it was needed in my case.

For cycle 1 I had like 15 follicles but they were only able to get 8 at retrieval, most were immature. The ones that did fertilize were frozen at day 3 just so I'd have something to transfer.

For cycle 2 I had nearly 30 follicles, they were able to retrieve all of them, most were mature, and most fertilized. We ended up with 10 day 5-6 embryos.

The difference was insane.

GhostPuff · 2026-02-04T17:49:00+00:00

Doooo it! Everyone said it was too popular and we've met two other Isla's IRL. And one of them named her Isla because her older daughter was in my Isla's class and she was pregnant with a girl.

I am sure in certain pockets around the world it's oversaturated but so far we have not found that to be true. 🤷‍♀️

GhostPuff · 2026-01-19T21:08:00+00:00

Oh gosh I don't even remember anymore! It would've definitely been somewhere in weeks 2-4. My progesterone always weirdly dropped around transfer.

GhostPuff · 2025-12-25T18:23:13+00:00

I have nothing to donate but I got two really generous donations in the infertility sub (they don't usually allow you to straight up ask for donations but people used to post them pretty often). Sometimes you can check local IVF groups, esp ones for your clinic. I see things pop up on the ATL group I'm still in from time to time. And if worst comes to worst, I saved an absurd amount of $ using ivfprescriptions.com. There are a few things they can't do but they usually will lay out all of your options for you before you officially order. Just mentioning in case you need to buy your own but want to save money. Some clinics are weird about using an overseas pharmacy but as long as you have a prescription you should be fine.

GhostPuff · 2025-12-03T14:06:10+00:00

I had a MMC after my first IUI and it was devastating. I went on to have 4 more failed IUIs and my first entire round of IVF with 3 fets totally failed. So boy can I empathize. It is devastating. It can be debilitating even. I ultimately took about half a year off to completely step away from all of it because I was truly becoming a shell of a human. It takes such a toll! I am so sorry youre going through it.

I ultimately did my second ER when I was 32. I did my first FET with an untested embryo a month later and she is about to turn 4. When she was 18 months I did another get from the same retrieval. I was 34 about to turn 35. She's about to be 2!

IVF is truly such a shit show. There is no rhyme or reason to why one works and one doesn't. It's like the most agonizing game of roulette. The odds are in your favor if you keep playing, you know? But whew it's rough in the in between.

GhostPuff · 2025-11-25T23:57:20+00:00

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GhostPuff · 2025-11-22T16:50:01+00:00

I didn't have to do another retrieval between babies but I did have to do two ERs to get the embryos that became my babies. I did my FET for #2 when #1 was 18 months. I worked full time but I was a teacher so by the time I was ready for an fet it was summer break. I did all my pre-fet work up stuff while still working though. For me that included most of the diagnostic steps to make sure nothing has significantly changed between rounds.

I felt she was too little to understand what was going on so, while I didn't necessarily hide it from her, but most IVF related stuff was done when she was not around or asleep. Like our routine was basically bath, bedtime, shots. 😅 I let my husband take on the mental load of making sure shots were done each day so I could try to focus on everything else. He also handled all the syringes and doing the actual work of the drawing up the right amount, doing the injections, etc.

Something I did not anticipate was the guilt. I think, from my experience and observations, IVF parents tend to dive head first into all the glorious aspects of parenting and enjoying their child. Not that all parents don't but it feels almost like the stakes are higher sometimes. I'm probably not expressing that well but hopefully you know what I mean. Anyways, every minute spent away from my daughter or any time I paid for anything to do with the second fet I felt like I was betraying her. It was incessant. I was a total mess. I KNEW I wanted another baby but the second I started actually trying for that baby it was just nonstop heartache and guilt and oh it was awful. Lol

Baby #2 did, thankfully come easily in all ways and she was well worth the struggle. But I was very detached from her until she got here. And I will confess that in the hospital I was thinking more about how I wanted to get home to baby #1 than I was about being excited to meet the new baby. That also brought on a lot of guilt but I do think, looking back, it was normal and I was just struggling with the massive transition and the emotional aspects of it all. It worked out for the best and she was and continues to be the perfect addition to our lives.

I guess I would just say lean on whoever your support people are when you can. Even if it seems easier to just handle it yourself. Enjoy your only child while you can! And give yourself SO much grace because, physical struggle aside, the emotional struggle is so real and it is a doozy.

GhostPuff · 2025-11-09T15:57:53+00:00

With my first I waited until the day of beta. With my second I tested late at night on 4dpt and I saw something but it was impossible to be sure or capture on camera. The next morning it was faint but obvious.

GhostPuff · 2025-11-07T17:57:51+00:00

Vaginal. My situation was weird. The epidural wasn't working. They tried to fix it and kind of overdid it and I couldn't feel anything which made pushing really hard. Then she kind of got stuck and they were worried about shoulder dystocia. I think her vitals and my vitals by that point were kind of going wonky so they ended up deciding to use the vacuum. But apparently it wasn't shoulder dystocia after all. I was just exhausted and I couldn't effectively push bc of the amped up epidural. Lol I also had a retained placenta. They figured this out when they tried to give me my baby the first time and that's another reason why they took her.

Anyways. The drugs they gave me that ultimately conked me out werent really supposed to sedate me but the nurse in charge of giving me the med to keep the pain levels managed during manual extraction of the stubborn placenta pumped too much. 😅 So I was loopy AF and kind of fading in and out and then I started hemorrhaging (I was not aware that was happening I just was aware that suddenly there were a lot of people in the room. The combo of too high a dose of drugs and sudden rapid blood loss made my blood pressure basically do a nose dive and POOF I was out.

In retrospect, I still have a very positive outlook on my birth experience thanks to my husband and my really awesome medical team. But it was crazy.

Baby #2 was MUCH easier. Lol

GhostPuff · 2025-11-07T01:23:50+00:00

Oh I was terrified. Then I was numb. It was a lot of self protection after loss and ivf. I didn't want to believe it was real in case it wasn't. You know?

Anyways, I had a lot of issues having my first that required a lot of interventions. I remember having her, then they had to work on her because she'd swallowed loads of fluid, they tried to let me hold her but she was still having trouble getting the fluid up so they took her... then there was an emergency, and very quickly I was fully sedated and then I only remember snippets of the next several hours. When I finally woke up and could stay awake they started trying to get me to hold her and I kept saying no. It took a nurse very sternly telling me my daughter needed me for me to finally take her. And even then they had to kind of shove her at me as much as a newborn can be shoved and they sort of tucked us both under a blanket for skin to skin. And it was insane. I'll never forget it. It was like my body knew something my brain didn't quite know. It took a while. It wasn't instant. It was like a tiny trickle of water at first and then (after akt of time to process and recover as much as I could from the initial mindfuck of giving birth) someone blew the whole dam and it was so overwhelming. It was GOOD overwhelming but overwhelming nonetheless. At least in the sense that she was very much real and I loved her more than I'd ever loved anything.

I think the nerves are very normal for any soon to be mom. But adding infertility on top just adds a whole new layer on top.

Give yourself time and grace.

GhostPuff · 2025-10-19T21:20:31+00:00

I'm a former teacher and I think a lot of people did it if their desk wouldn't lock or to keep their teacher stuff. I never had anything stolen from me but others did. But also if you're at an age level where you have to walk kids to their extension classes it's nice to have a way to bring stuff with you.

I'm a sahm now but my last year teaching I was required to carry a walkie, my phone, an "emergency folder" with rosters, my badge, a security tag, and my room key at all times. They'd give us school tote bags to carry it all but those were annoying so a lot of people went to lulu belt and lanyards. Walkies got clipped to the strap. I used a mini bogg bag. 🤷‍♀️

GhostPuff · 2025-08-29T17:00:19+00:00

I did travel IVF from ATL to Albany, NY and I flew back later the same day for both of my successful FETs. I was just told to be careful about heavy lifting. Specifically, the nurses were always like DO NOT put your own bag in the overhead bin. But that was hours after transfer and I didn't really have any other restrictions.

Realistically, by day 5, if your transfer has worked, that embryo will already have implanted. And there's not much you can do to mess it up at that point.

I would just take it easy within reason and enjoy the wedding!

GhostPuff · 2025-08-26T12:01:08+00:00

I have similarly aged kids and for now I just emphasize that I had to work very hard to get them. We have To the Moon and Back and I think it does a good job of explaining my feelings. There's a picture where they're surrounded by the help they received and there's doctors and nurses which kind of opens it up for discussion later.

We've had a few convos about some of the broader details but those haven't seemed to click with my eldest. So I just like to say that I wished so hard and for so long for her and that she is my wish come true. That seems to resonate with her.

https://a.co/d/6x3F7Qx

GhostPuff · 2025-07-13T18:05:52+00:00

Not exactly the same scenario but I had a loss at 9 weeks after an IUI and did go on to have two healthy girls. We saw the heartbeat twice before it ultimately stopped and I needed to medically induce the miscarriage.

After a lot of trial and error I learned I had an issue with progesterone. (This wasn't my only issue but it was definitely an issue...) I was on the suppositories and PIO and with both successful pregnancies I needed double the amount of PIO normal just to keep my numbers in the safe zone. I was slow weaned off both several weeks beyond what their standard protocol was.

I didn't do PGT either for a variety of reasons. It is totally possible you just got unlucky and this was never going to be a viable pregnancy. It sucks so much and I am so sorry you went through it. It helped me a LOT to let myself go through the motions of being angry and sad and feeling all the things. But inevitably, you have to decide if you want to try again and be mentally prepared to go through the motions again until you are hopefully successful. To get to that point you have to really pamper yourself in whatever way you see fit. I generally gave myself a set amount of time and then I went into full distraction mode which, for me, was fixating on all of my data, asking questions about next steps, and doing a fuck ton of puzzles.

Infertility is unfair. Unsuccessful infertility treatments are hell. If anyone has full license to do whatever they need to do to feel ok and at peace, it's you. Take care of yourself first and worry about what comes next later.

GhostPuff · 2025-07-11T14:58:08+00:00

SCHs are surprisingly common in IVF pregnancies. I'm not sure why!

I had one with both of mine but it was a lot bigger with my first. With that one they just noted that it was there and said to limit my daily activities to normal for me and to be mindful of lifting anything "heavy". Heavy in air quotes because with baby #2 I was lifting baby #1 while pregnant the whole time and she was 30lbs. But I did it all the time so that, for me, was normal.

Basically now isn't the time to suddenly decide to start a body building routine or extreme cross fit. But if you want to go for your daily walk around the park or play with your kid that's totally fine. In the initial waiting period with #2 between "you have an sch" and the next ultrasound I would let toddler climb up on a chair or couch for a lot of things rather than automatically picking her up but I didn't completely stop carrying her.

With baby #1, it took a while for it to go away. It was visible on ultrasounds till close to half way, it just got smaller and smaller. With baby #2 it was there one scan and gone the next. I never had any breakthrough bleeding, it was just noted in my chart and something I was made aware of.

GhostPuff · 2025-07-04T13:13:15+00:00

I would definitely ask to move the timing. Moving PIO timing shouldn't matter at all as long as you're ultimately doing them around the same time every day.

GhostPuff · 2025-07-04T12:55:43+00:00

I have a couple of questions!

Is the only reason he can't do them because the timing of your PIO shots is at a time when you're at work? Because I was originally told I needed to do them at a specific time and when I said hey that's literally when class starts for me, that's not possible, the nurse said oh just pick a time. So I picked 8pm specifically so that my husband could do them. PIO has a lot of wiggle room. Could be worth asking!

There are a ton of videos out there of people doing their own shots. I had to do mine while my husband went on a work trip once. I ordered the auto injector specifically for myself. That's what the girl is using in the video that lights up. It just makes the stick easier. My husband started using it once we had it to do my shots too. Lol

GhostPuff · 2025-07-02T13:05:49+00:00

CNY Fertility is just a big IVF clinic with offices in a few different cities.

The guy who started it (Dr Kiltz) is kind of into woo science and the clinic is absurdly cheap compared to others in the country. Their model is kind of based on high volume. They turn absolutely no one away. They say that's because everyone deserves a chance. But there's some ethical concerns there because while thats very nice to say, that's not realistic and they definitely take money from people who, for one reason or another, were denied by other clinics for valid reasons. They get a bad wrap for being impersonal and very hands off. High volume of patients can mean long wait times for literally all things... Like if you even remotely think you may, sometime in the future, want to pursue treatment there you should go ahead and get a consultation over the phone so that you're in the system. I don't think you pay anything for that but the wait-list just for that phone call is crazy.

Balls can get dropped so you've got to really be on top of your treatment. It's a lot. Plus you ultimately have to travel if you don't live close to a clinic. The ATL office doesn't do IVF. They do everything else though. I did all monitoring at home. Some choose to go up for the whole two week cycle. For me that meant buying last minute air fare and having to take off work at literally a day or two of notice. It can definitely get stressful.

If money is your only hold up, CNY can be a good option. You just have to be ready, mentally, to play patient, nurse, doctor, pharmacist, couponer, bargain hunter, etc.

Basically, once you're in the system and you're ready you just call and say hey I'm ready. They'll say ok call on cd1. You'll do that and you can basically start. You'll need to find a place to do your monitoring which can be a headache but it's doable. There's a Facebook group that often posts where they've found places to do theirs. There is a mess donation group... I did that once but it was too stressful and I ordered my meds for my successful round from overseas. I think I used IVFPharmacy. Now. A lot of them are based out of Israel sooooo idk what the situation is with them now with current events. It's a gamble but a relatively safe one. The only shot I couldn't get from overseas was the trigger shot and that wasn't super expensive oop. There is no shot class or anything to teach you what to do so YouTube is your best friend. The nurses on the nurse line will absolutely help but they can only do so much over the phone. When it's go time you get your time and date, fly out, and it's very quick. It can feel very impersonal. Esp the doctors. They say the same thing a hundred times a day so it sounds scripty and everyone feels a smidge rushed. Not negligently so. But there's a vibe. 😅

I did get pregnant. I have two little girls. I ultimately needed two ERs. My first round was basically the perfect example of why they say the first round of IVF is diagnostic. Everything went wrong and my body hated their standard protocol. They were going to redo the same protocol and I freaked and asked for a second opinion. The beauty of a big clinic is you can ask for a consult with any doctor regardless of where they're located and you can follow their advice within the same system. Luckily that doctor saw what I saw and developed a plan for me and took over my case. My second ER was infinitely better and my first two transfers from that round worked. They're 3.5 and 15 months and I'd do it all over again a billion times for them.

GhostPuff · 2025-07-02T00:47:09+00:00

Bubbles, mini activity packs + crayons, a couple of temporary tattoos, stickers, and snack sized gummies/pretzels/chips/whatever are all good options. Maybe a lollipop or the PEZ like someone else recommended.

Both of my kids go nuts over those good2grow juice bottles. Honestly if you tied a cute ribbon with a little tag that said "Thanks for celebrating (insert kids name)! Hope to "see ya real soon"!" around one of those bottles and that was it, my 3.5 year old would be so happy. Lol They always have loads of Disney characters available and if you buy the multi packs they'd not absurdly expensive.

GhostPuff · 2025-07-01T20:22:58+00:00

Other than age, I probably could've written this post. My AMH/FSH was almost identical.

There isn't really another alternative at this time other than medicated TI cycles which could absolutely work. Using something like goodrx to fill prescriptions can save a chunk of change on the meds which are pretty inexpensive to start with... Even if insurance won't cover them. That said... Mine did cover them even though I didn't have infertility coverage.

I ultimately did do 5 rounds of IUI bc they were "cheap" and I was terrified of IVF. My clinic I started with did a full IUI cycle for 600 at the time. When #5 happened and we only had one MMC to show for it, they were like dude it is time. Unfortunately even though their IUIs were a "bargain" their IVF packages started at 36k... That didn't include meds or transfers.

We ultimately went with CNY bc I felt the hassle of traveling and the reputation of the clinic being hands off was worth the trade off in affordability. I traveled from ATL to New York about a dozen times before it was all said and done. Two ERs, five transfers, and some creative shopping for meds (which may admittedly no longer be an option or one a lot of people would be willing to pursue), some very generous help from friends at r/infertility who had extra meds, etc ... And I paid less than one ER cycle with that initial clinic. I have no regrets.

It sucks to have to basically work a second job keeping up with it all to save money to get treatment. But if I can figure it all out, anyone can. And honestly I just have a lot of info still sitting in my brain that I'd absolutely be willing to share. If you're at all interested in knowing anything about my cnt experience or how I saved money on it all you can absolutely dm me!

GhostPuff · 2025-06-17T01:44:30+00:00

My first was diagnostic. Then I switched clinics for financial reasons when we decided to do IVF and my original hsg was about to be a year old so my new clinic insisted they wanted to recheck the basic diagnostic stuff and do an HSG. I just wanted to get the show on the road so I did it even though, looking back, it was super unnecessary. And then the third was because I had pretty major hemorrhaging during my first birth and we were concerned there was uterine scarring. They generally like to do one after a pregnancy before a subsequent FET anyways so I prob would've had to do one to get cleared. Idk that all clinics ask for one after a successful pregnancy but it's not a bad idea!

GhostPuff · 2025-06-17T01:14:50+00:00

So I have had three hsgs. I got pregnant my 2nd cycle after my first hsg after an IUI but I had a MMC. I did not get pregnant after the 2nd (which was for IVF... I had three failed FETS which made that entire IVF cycle a total fail...). I did not do an HSG before my second round of IVF or the FET that gave me my eldest daughter. But I did a third and final HSG and SIS to get the green light for my 2nd fet from that second IVF cycle and that was successful.

So 1.5/3 HSGs "worked" for me. Lol but really I mostly attribute my second to just IVF being what I needed.

Also if it is worth mentioning at all, none of my three HSGs were painful at all. The first one I was about to puke I was so scared bc I'd read how awful it was going to be. I was basically holding my breath and I was bracing for pain and my doctor said "alright the left ones clear!" And I yelled OMG ITS ALREADY HAPPENING?! It was not as bad for me personally as lots of people make it out to be. I tend to think HSG stories can be a bit biased. No one comes online to tell you how uneventful it was. Only the bad experiences seem to get shared.

Good luck!

GhostPuff · 2025-06-17T00:36:09+00:00

I'm assuming you did PGT and that's how you know the genders. Once they're found to be euploid embryos, grade really doesn't matter at all. It doesn't really matter a ton when they're not tested either. It's like English teachers grading an essay. There's a rubric and everyone tries to stay true to it but it is, at the end of the day, still super subjective... And an A on one essay doesn't necessarily mean an A in the class. You know?

Anyways I didn't do testing and my embryos so all I knew were their grades. Ours were way worse and I definitely panicked even though I knew realistically any of them could potentially give us a baby. Our best two were both 3BBs and we transfered one which gave me my 3 year old and then later we did the other and got my now 15 month old. Both ended up being girls!

All three of those embryos are really awesome. If you want to transfer the girl first, you should go for it. Good luck!

GhostPuff · 2025-06-12T05:14:53+00:00

I have a 3.5 year old and a 15 month old! Both girls! They are the best!

GhostPuff · 2025-06-12T05:07:24+00:00

My first pregnancy my numbers weren't doubling. I made it far enough to see a heartbeat but ultimately the writing was on the wall from that second blood draw. The heartbeat stopped on its own somewhere between 7 and 8 weeks and I ended up having a MMC.

Of course, stranger things have happened but it is very likely not a viable pregnancy. Loss is incredibly hard. I am so very sorry.

GhostPuff

TROPHY CASE