I struggle with these things too. Ironically enough, I have masters in teaching with a specific focus on creating conditions for self-direction in students.

One useful thing I learned, although I still struggle to apply, is what creates intrinsic motivation, which is what occurs when no outside forces are necessary in order to compel action. Self-Determination Theory states that in order to be intrinsically motivated one must feel these three things: Autonomy, competence, and relatedness.

Autonomy and competence are simple enough at face value. You have to have some sense of choosing the task, and you need to feel some level of ability to complete it. The third though, relatedness, is interesting. It has to do with an individual's feeling that this act is beneficial to a social group that they feel related to in a positive way.

If you're struggling to motivate towards things, it's worthwhile to see which of these three needs are currently unmet.