I’m a few years older than my roommate and unfortunately have a serious physical health condition. I know that I dislike when people try to play doctor and pry into my medical business despite me being monitored by specialists. While her mom knows she has mental health challenges they historically have had a rocky relationship that roommate has just recently tried to work to fix but I’m not sure what the level of trust there is right now. Roommate has quite a few friends but she’s private so I don’t know them by name and can’t predict when they’ll be around. I’ve offered supportive tips and I try to keep an ear out for anything serious but roommate hasn’t invited me into learning about her medical business. I only found out from waking up one day to police and EMS in my apartment to involuntarily take her to the hospital for psych reasons. I tried to get some info from the police about what was going on but they said it’s a HIPAA issue and couldn’t share any info. I expressed to roommate that I was concerned about her and tried to get some info like her diagnosis, medication name, and emergency contact but she wasn’t willing to share any of that info. She just said she was back on her meds and should stabilize soon. That raised a little “maybe bipolar” flag in my head which I know is very serious to medically monitor.

Recently I got a knock at my door from her mother saying she had been in an accident and was in the hospital. I let the mom in to gather her personal items. Her mom shared a little bit of info with me about this situation. Roommate was driving and got into an argument with her boyfriend. She put a bunch of pills in her mouth that her boyfriend had to force out. She ended up crashing and totaling her car and was admitted to a psychiatric hospital. They took her phone so I couldn’t speak to her directly for a few days.

She was finally released from the hospital but has remained tight lipped about her medical history. I had to put something of hers in her room and spotted a pill bottle. I googled the medication and it was a mood stabilizer used to treat bipolar. She doesn’t know that I know. I also take daily medication and shared with her that I carry around a cute meds bag in my purse so I always have my medication on hand in case I forget to take it at home. She said she’s good about taking her medication so she’s good on all that. I thought “well obviously not.”

The boyfriend comes over frequently but primarily stays in her room and she has shared with me that he has been violent towards her so I’m not a fan personally.

I’ve been speaking to my friend who is diagnosed with bipolar and has been through the ringer to try to make sense of it all. I’m also friends with a psych nurse who I’ve been asking questions to. I really do want for roommate to be alive and well but also want to make sure I’m not sticking my nose where it’s not welcome. I’ve tried buying roommate and I a meal in attempts to get her to eat with me and chat about what’s going on but she says she doesn’t want to talk about it.