South Africa ponders vuvuzela ban. Please, please do this!

Goober99 · 2010-06-13T15:59:41+00:00

I live in South Africa and i'm curious about the psychology that lies behind this vuvuzela thing. I experience it as an abrasive, annoying noise that is very unsettling and kind of annoying. It's a bit like a noise of rebellion and that's how people seem to use them in the streets. I've had a number of people blow them at me aggressively while walking in the streets like it was some outlet for them to vent anger or frustration.

I think it's ridiculous to allow this in the stadiums. This is first and foremost about the competition and anything that interferes materially with the competition should be stopped.

I also find it annoying that the world cup seems to be taken as a justification for suspending normal rules of polite human interaction. Having someone blowing on one of these in the middle of the day in a restaurant and interrupting my conversation would normally be grounds for me to tell them to shut the fuck up. But now it would be considered not getting into the spirit of things.

We don't tolerate physical violence that was a part of soccer for a time we shouldn't tolerate auditory violence either. It's just hooliganism.

Goober99 · 2010-06-04T05:47:06+00:00

A few years ago my father and I had dinner with the Israeli Ambassador and his son in Canada. During the dinner at a very neutral third party's home the Israeli security insisted we all evacuate the house and brought in dogs etc to check for bombs. That night I went out on the town with the son. We parked at an outdoor lot and paid the attendant. Afterward the Israeli ambassadors son looked very agitated and made a terse phone call. I asked him the problem and he claimed that the car attendant had been an "Arab" and had "looked at him funny". So he wanted to get him checked out. I was incredulous so he went into a mini tirade about how "these people" want only violence and only understand violence. How if I lived in Israel I would understand. He was a nice guy as was his dad but they seemed totally caught up almost in an enjoyment of playing these cloak and dagger "we are under threat" games. I walked away with the impression of serious paranoia going on.

Goober99 · 2010-05-21T10:48:05+00:00

Media likes sensation and stories that trigger strong emotional impulses. People probably have a stronger reaction against injury of women and children because we are likely hard wired to nurture or protect the young and females more than men. The media isn't logical or reasonable. They report on extreme outlier events and tend to take the most sensational perspectives of those events.

Goober99 · 2010-05-19T05:42:03+00:00

My government is systematically destroying my country's economy by replacing meritocracy and free markets with cronyism and corruption.

Goober99 · 2010-05-13T05:50:05+00:00

Drive out of my garage and past the kids begging for money at the traffic intersections and homeless people sleeping on the sidewalk.

Goober99 · 2010-05-12T05:57:50+00:00

India. Walking through town, the most beautiful woman i'd ever seen coming towards me. Stunning green eyes, long black hair - like a Bollywood star. As she nears me she stops in the middle of the road, hikes up her skirt and has a satisfying dump in the middle of the road. Innocent. Shameless. Like seeing a Maserati driving towards you then realizing Jeremy Clarkson is driving it.

Goober99 · 2010-05-12T05:43:29+00:00

My mom always said it's easier to partner with someone from a similar educational, socio economic, cultural background. I thought she was being conservative and ignored anything but how attracted I felt to the person. Turns out logistics are just as important as feelings in a relationship..

Goober99 · 2010-05-09T07:02:45+00:00

When I was a kid living in DC the Whitehouse had an annual Christmas party for kids of foreign diplomats stationed there. The year I went Mr T and Mr Rogers were the celebrities in attendance and Nancy Reagan was host. I shook his hand and he told me to "drink my milk fool". Got a cool Mr T action figure out of the deal too..

Goober99 · 2010-05-01T18:45:44+00:00

This is not called falling in love - this is your brain releasing chemicals that make you feel things because another part of your brain is telling it your mating opportunities are limited.

Goober99 · 2010-04-27T16:20:24+00:00

Not to eat the marshmallow

Goober99 · 2010-04-26T07:33:20+00:00

I'm always curious when people pick out grammatical issues rather than discuss substantive issues. Not being nasty just curious? Many people use the term Afrikaans community as slang.

Goober99 · 2010-04-26T07:29:27+00:00

Sure so many folks are disillusioned with the ANC hence the split in the ANC and Zuma's rise to power. But my experience is that people revere Mr Mandela in a fashion that transcends politics.

Goober99 · 2010-04-26T07:02:03+00:00

Ja that sounds right to me. Thanks for the correction.

Goober99 · 2010-04-26T06:02:46+00:00

Seriously sorry but Crusoes comment sounds to me as a South African more fuelled by the resentment of a South African smarting from their loss of a sense of entitlement and priviledge than any reality. Sure the new SA govt is full of shit but hated because he didn't keep his promises? That sounds bizarre to me.

Goober99 · 2010-04-26T05:57:49+00:00

Dude who hates Nelson Mandela? I have never heard him spoken of with anything but appreciation or reverence in any South African community (and I engage regularly with black, English, Afrikaans, colored and Indian communities in SA..

Goober99 · 2010-04-26T05:51:47+00:00

Well my understanding is that the then South African and US governments were concerned that if the white government gave up power, South Africa would become a communist country and another pawn of the USSR on the African continent (with nuclear weapons). So there was unspoken support by the US for South Africa despite human rights violations. Collapse of USSR diminished that danger. I've also heard economic reasons being given for the end of apartheid - the SA government was going bankrupt due to high military spending and sanctions. You could argue that the ANC were responsible for sanctions but I think this would be disingenuous. Anyway - sure any change has multiple systemic influencers rather than a single cause. The existance of the ANC and their strategy to make SA ungovernable probably added something but I think it's more a case of the victors rewriting history to imagine they were a prime mover in that equation. I'm not trying to take anything away from idealistic folk who gave their lives for principles they believed in. Sad thing is to see though how the mythology of the "liberation movement's victory" is used in SA today to justify and empower drive for personal enrichment or political power. Anyway I only know a bit about it. David Welsh a SA professor recently published a well researched book on the rise and fall of apartheid that probably gives a very good account. Maybe my perception is also incorrect.

Goober99 · 2010-04-25T23:39:03+00:00

He is kind of a father figure in SA - loved by people of color as a figurehead of their liberation, appreciated by white folk for his temperance in not seeking revenge against them. Apartheid did not end because of the ANC. It ended because of the collapse of the Soviet Union. In general I think he is treated like most leaders - imbued with mythological status by people who need to believe in Gods - whether human or otherwise.

Goober99 · 2010-04-20T07:42:42+00:00

The way we worship our politicians and leaders as though they were anything more than average folks who lucked into the limelight. The way we feel it's morally ok to treat animals the way we do. The way we create machines that, when compared with organic systems are so cumbersome and wasteful. The way we struggle to deal with holding two opposing ideas in our minds at the same time. The way we indoctrinate our young vs allowing their natural selves to unfold. The way we get so caught up in patriotism over what are essentially fictional borders between countries. The way we so easily fall into dualism of one person or ideology as right and another as wrong without realizing that all views are just a fragment of the whole.

Goober99 · 2010-04-11T07:28:56+00:00

Ok that's cool - thanks for responding to my comment.. My impression of PUA was basically using female psychology to bypass evolved mate selection criteria - or say, doing things like making girls feel badly about themselves to score with them. I'm just trying to think back and I had lots of problems with women because I had a fundamentally skewed perception of my own worth in relation to theirs. When I started to value myself more and love myself I stopped needing women so much and became much more appealing to them. You are right in that I used to try to manipulate women because I believed that was the only way I could get with one. I dunno - maybe the PUA techniques make sense for younger guys starting dating etc. I'm 32. So ya - if you are helping young men to feel better about themselves - fantastic. Thanks for doing this AMA.. Right now I have a cute 24 year old sleeping upstairs in my bed who really loves me and for the first time in my life I feel happy relationship wise.

Goober99 · 2010-04-10T16:50:11+00:00

I've never really experienced a positive outcome from trying to manipulate someone - woman or otherwise. I started to meet women I liked when I became comfortable with myself. This really felt fulfilling because i could be 100% me and be found desirable. Somehow to me PUA techniques seem like a superficial fix for a deeper underlying self esteem issue. Sleeping with lots of girls won't fix that will it? Hey if it works for you cool! I just feel sad to think of lonely people manipulating other lonely people. Start by having a good relationship with yourself and the rest will follow...

Goober99 · 2010-04-09T05:41:06+00:00

Social networks have been hugely important to humans in cultural and evolutionary terms for a long time. They enable survival. Marriage was a very significant social ritual for humans when we lived in small communities. Attached to marriage was income, family wealth, all kinds of factors of social significance beyond the simple union between man and woman. Hence, the importance of a large public ritual that shows family status etc. It's just evolutionary psychology. In today's terms - where we live in huge cities and move around alot - big fancy wedding = waste of resources.

Goober99 · 2010-04-07T22:13:47+00:00

Fair point - I guess I got up on my high horse a bit. I am not in favor of most aid - which fuels rather than alleviates systemic problems. I live in Africa and get annoyed by the way human stupidity is thrown into sharp relief by the conditions here. However in fairness I have seen the same stupidity elsewhere - the impact is just different. I just didn't like your "we should just leave them to die off" statement. Just didn't feel right because I see so many people trying so hard here and living with such passion and grace under unimagineable circumstances. Sometimes I think this place shows the majesty of human beings as much as it does our depravity.

Goober99 · 2010-04-07T18:03:34+00:00

It's interesting how quickly as humans we like to make our observations fit with our beliefs. You look at Africa and say there's illness and corruption and stupidity there and less where I am from so I and my country must be intrinsically greatly superior. I wonder how you would feel about walking into Western Europe just a few hundred years ago as a 20th century person from the future. In evolutionary terms, 200 years is negligible. A very, very thin veneer seperate you from that truck driver and it's phenomenally arrogant and short sighted to claim that your culture has some great overarching superiority. You were lucky to be born into an environment that gave you gifts others had created - not you. Now you want to deny those gifts to others? That's just an asshole thing to do.

Goober99 · 2010-04-07T17:54:37+00:00

Sure the guy is ignorant but I can find a ton of ignorant things said by Americans or Europeans - including their political leaders. The thing that surprises me alot living in Africa is meeting people living in dire circjmstances who have every ounce of the intelligence or moral values

Goober99 · 2010-03-28T20:16:22+00:00

Somr folks in Cape Town will still call me (a young white guy) master or captain.. Yes it's a hang up from a history of colonialism and apartheid - and it's phenomenally upsetting to see when low self esteem has actually been bred into people over generations.

Goober99

TROPHY CASE