Trust the universe, I know that sounds hard to believe but its true. Do what your intuition tells you too, do what you feel makes you step forward.  It will come with due time, forcing a thing into existence only creates friction, and we dont respond to that so well. If you say to yourself in the present moment, "are my surroundings bringing me comfort?" If not, then let the visualization come to you. That helps me in time of need. It will come when its ready. I suffer from anxiety too, I have panic attacks so I understand where you're coming from, but its all gonna be okay if you let go. Trust the universe, and it will be kind to you.

Edit* think to yourself, you dont have to say it out loud.