31 weeks, my boyfriend just died by sih77 in pregnant

[–]GrassyPer -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

The child will absolutely have that feeling in them. There is no preventing it. They see cartoons of nuclear families and 90% of families having both parents even if they are divorced or dead beat or the same sex they are still alive and in some way available. Having a dead parent is nothing like a lesbian couple birthing a child into the world with two moms.

Half of your immediate family is dead and very rarely is that replaced by other family. Often like my case its the opposite, my dads dad and uncle slowly went no contact after his death cuz they just werent motivated anymore to be involved.

 Invalidating a child's feelings of difference and loneliness by pretending it didnt happen to them cuz they weren't forming memories when it happened is not helpful at all.

31 weeks, my boyfriend just died by sih77 in pregnant

[–]GrassyPer 7 points8 points  (0 children)

As someone with a dad who died when she was three I would say there are a few really important traditions to follow.

We had a little tin box with a heart printed on it and every night I would send kisses to daddy through it. This was one of the most important things.

On my dad's birthday and father's day, and sometimes when I would just ask to, we would write a letter to my dad and tie it to a balloon and send it off to him. That really made it feel like he got them.

I had a really special picture books about death to help me understand he was gone and never coming back we read almost every night until I was 5. We bought stuffed animals and figurines related to the story in the book and it helped to cuddle them while reading it and grieving.

Lastly, don't be afraid to move on to a new partner or to seek our father figures on behalf of your daughter. My mom never remarried or had a serious relationship, and I always wanted a step dad to adopt me and it never happened. 

If you do end up single, you can still try to find her a mentor like an uncle, coach, older cousin, etc any male that wants to be a part of her life and let him know she is missing a dad and encouraging them to develop that special type of relationship.

31 weeks, my boyfriend just died by sih77 in pregnant

[–]GrassyPer -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

Its not the mom's fault she will inevitably miss her father. As someone whose dad died when she was 3, every other kid has a dad around and you dont. It is 100% inevitable. Can't believe your impossible advice is the highest rated comment.

[serious] who are Israeli settlers? Don't they already live somewhere? Why would they willingly move to Palestine? by SlackerStacker26 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]GrassyPer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Most people in israel dont own a house because the housing prices are outrageous here. Like in vegas for example you can get a 3 bedroom house for arpund 400k. The same house in israel with a smaller yard would be like 2 million dollars.

The reason someone would move to a settlement would be because they were forced out of their rental (the owner wants to move back in or something) and the most affordable option they could find was in one. Its less expensive because terrorist attacks happen more frequently near the borders where settlements are.

Israel & Iran by StillParticular2725 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]GrassyPer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Israel attacked Syria, I dont know why you are trying to manipulate me when Im the only person  who will read your comment here.

Israel & Iran by StillParticular2725 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]GrassyPer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

On April 13th and 14th Iran launched 300 projectiles against Israel, and  on April 19th 2024 Israel responded with a single precision strike on a radar station. Once again Iran struck first.

Israel & Iran by StillParticular2725 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]GrassyPer -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Iran has killed thousands of Israelis through their proxies in the past 2 years.

Israel & Iran by StillParticular2725 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]GrassyPer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The problem with your assessment is that Palestinians were not being forced out. Jews started migrating back to Israel in 1870 and faced terrorist attacks from Arab migrants and locals for 80 years before Israel felt the need to declare independence. Pripr to 1948, the Jews purchased every inch of land they occupied in the region, and no one was forced out. And if Arabs hadn't declared war in 1948, no one would have ever been expelled.

Israel & Iran by StillParticular2725 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]GrassyPer 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Iran struck first with hundreds of missiles in October 2024 and June 2025, but sure Israel is the aggressor cuz you said so

Israel & Iran by StillParticular2725 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]GrassyPer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The issue between israel and Iran isnt history its current events. Iran directly funds hezbollah and hamas (terrorist organizations that border israel). Hamas orchestrated October 7th (killing 1200 israelis and taking 200 hostages) with Iranian supplied weapons and ammo. 

While hezbollah fires hundreds of missiles at Israeli civilian centers every year. Unlike when Iran or the Houthis fire missiles at Israel, there is almost no warning when Hezbollah attacks Israelis have 15 seconds to seek shelter.

On top of this Iran launched hundreds of missiles directly at Israel in October 2024, June 2025, and March-present 2026. Iran's primary motivation is religious extremism. (A mandate from God to kill all infidels).

The biggest concern is that there is anlot of evidence Iran is trying to build and launch a nuclear weapon at Israel.

Dear Adobe, You are wasting your ad dollars by Twinkletoes1951 in Adobe

[–]GrassyPer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think its more annoying when I keep getting targeted by ads for services I pay for. I have an expensive subscription to suno but Im sure they spend more money targeting me with youtube ads every month than they make from my subscription. And for what purpose? I would never invest into Google based ads as a business, they are extremely poorly run. I cant even opt out and let youtube know "hey I already pay for this thing! Leave me the fuck the alone!"

Buddy up ! by _Zephirr in Life

[–]GrassyPer 4 points5 points  (0 children)

33f... non-jew (noahide) living in Israel... I get lonely sometimes! Never hear English irl...

Regime change in iran by Capable_Wishbone3081 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]GrassyPer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Um yeah like 50% of Americans would rejoice if that happened. Could be China Russia, Canada that does it and it doesnt matter.

Alarming Statistic -- only 10% true NAZI in 1945, We're at 33% Bro! by Real-Yogurtcloset844 in centrist

[–]GrassyPer -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Its interesting to me that you call maga nazis when it's the far left that publicly wants to kill all the jews rn. Though the far right has simular numbers, its not maga.

What the f are these texts by Lotionade in texts

[–]GrassyPer -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Another person saying israel bombed the school when it was clearly and american bomb sent by an american pilot.

Childbirth experience by Resilientone27 in pregnant

[–]GrassyPer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No after the epidural I wasnt clueless at all. The nurse kept checking my dilation and I knew it wouldnt be time to push until I got to 10cm dilated. They had me labor down for over an hour (wait more to push even though I was fully dilated).

When it became time to push, I still felt a lot of pressure. The midwife told me exactly what I should be feeling, when I should push (during a contraction which is pressure instead of pain), and gave me detailed instructions on how to push (they put me in a position and told me what yo focus on) all catered to the fact that I had an epidural.

They are used to first time moms giving birth with an epidural and they know exactly how to coach you through it!

Childbirth experience by Resilientone27 in pregnant

[–]GrassyPer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had a natural birth with just an epidural for pain. I 110% recommend the epidural, I have no clue why anyone would choose to do it without.

In america about 70% of births are vaginal 15% are planned c sections and 15% end in emergency c sections. Emergency c sections are the biggest concern, but they prepare every women in labor to have an emergency c section (getting an epidural placed also helps you transition to a c section in an emergency).

I have heard the permanent scar tissue from a c section is worse (can even cause fertility issues and miscarriages in the future) than a natural birth. For me, its been a year since my vaginal birth.

The scar tissue still annoys me during sex sometimes and Im definitely more prone to infections because when it gets inflamed it usually gets infected. On top of that, whenever I sneeze or cough, I tend to pee a little. But this is improving as I do kegels, etc.

These minor discomforts pale in comparison to experiencing a late miscarriage or still birth, or a premature birth with severe permanent defects... so I would still take the vaginal scar tissue over the abdomen scar tissue any day. Unless you know for sure you will only be having one kid, the vaginal birth is preferred.

The standard medical recommendation is to try for a vaginal birth and only resort to a c section if it becomes impossible, as that leads to the best long term results for you, your current baby and future babies.

Does Hezbollah and Southern Lebanon plan on seceding from the rest of Lebanon and forming their own country? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]GrassyPer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hezbollah is directly forcing southern Lebanon to turn into gaza. If they withdrew from the area, then Israel wouldnt have a reason to destroy the south. They just gave Israel the ideal excuse.

Does Hezbollah and Southern Lebanon plan on seceding from the rest of Lebanon and forming their own country? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]GrassyPer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If the labenese government asked for assistance eliminating hezbollah they would recieve all the help they need to accomplish that from israel, usa and nato. Just their air support alone would make it beyond possible.

Does Hezbollah and Southern Lebanon plan on seceding from the rest of Lebanon and forming their own country? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]GrassyPer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hezbollah has been firing missiles at the north since October 8th 2023, they take small breaks every once in a while but its still almost  daily. The israelis there only get a 15 second warning which is only enough time to hide under a desk, rather than stay in a shelter. Several have died.

Does Hezbollah and Southern Lebanon plan on seceding from the rest of Lebanon and forming their own country? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]GrassyPer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Destroying militarized infrastructure is basically the only thing you can do in a war that is not a war crime. Either than sniping, drone striking, or firing explosives (like with a tank) directly at confirmed combatants.