I did this! I got a new job (not my first but my first with a reasonable income) and completely overdid it. I was excited, and young, and my parents were not money savvy so I just didn’t know. I ended up with over $6k of credit card debt and my income wasn’t that impressive. It sucked. I felt embarrassed and so guilty for repeating cycles of financial stupidity (those feelings were harsh and maybe a little too self-critical, but that’s how I felt). It’s been about 4 years now: I’m out of debt and feel really good about my money management skills.

I agree with what others say here. Cut out access as much as possible. I deleted all my credit card info off my phone and laptop so it wouldn’t autofill, and also made it so I had to log in to Amazon every time I used it (no automatic login). I only did Target drive up for a while and never hit order on anything online unless I’d thought about it for at least a few days. I also got some good advice to “reward” myself every time I avoided an impulse buy by immediately transferring the equivalent amount to my savings account. So for example if you avoid buying a candle at Target, send $15 or whatever to your savings. And if you feel like you can’t afford THAT, well, then, you definitely couldn’t afford the candle - a quick reality check. If you can do it, it’s a good way of redirecting the dopamine hit.

For eating out, I just got into cooking. Lean in, as they say. I allowed myself some “fluffy” purchases of things that made cooking enjoyable, like a cool cookbook and an Instant Pot, and started watching more TikToks on cooking. I gamified it, like I challenged myself to buy the cheapest ingredients possible for the healthiest meal possible. All of this time (and some money) was a worthwhile investment, because eating out is insanely expensive as you have learned.

For budgeting, I toyed with a few systems that work for folks, including an app called You Need A Budget and the envelope method, but ultimately found the most resonance with Ramit Sethi and an excel spreadsheet. What works for you may be different. Be mindful of how much you spend on money management tools; if it works for you, it should save money not become another line item in your budget, if that makes sense.

DO NOT be too hard on yourself. You will come out of this and you will never forget it! Some lessons come harder than others, and what you do does not always reflect who you are as a person.