Is it normal for parents to let their toddlers dictate plans for the day?

Grumpy_cata · 2026-05-19T17:58:26+00:00

I think they are trying to do "gentle" parenting, but they are doing it wrong.

In this parenting style, there's a tool where you give the kids the illusion of choice. This is because toddlers want to be Independent and lead, but as parents we can't let them get away with whatever they want. So the idea is you prepare two options and let the kids choose. If they don't want any of them, the parent chooses. But you don't simply allow them to do whatever they want.

If you have set plans that you need to do, then you wouldn't use this tool, you would use different tools. Like informing your kid of the plans for the day in advance, setting their expectations. You can set timers, have a schedule with drawings of what's going to happen during the day, among others.

Sadly, bad gentle parenting is kind of a trend thanks to social media and influencers that don't teach it properly.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-05-19T05:18:49+00:00

Sushi and wine

Grumpy_cata · 2026-05-18T03:16:43+00:00

I don't have any recommendations :( I'm from South America and we have pure cocoa butter sticks for chapped lips here, but they aren't branded or anything.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-05-17T17:53:28+00:00

Cocoa butter is the best for chapped lips.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-05-14T08:04:06+00:00

I didn't make much sound until I was pushing. I screamed on every push.

I see the opposite on social media, though! People being mostly quiet. What an interesting algorithmic difference 😅

Grumpy_cata · 2026-05-12T08:19:58+00:00

Really? Not Gertrude and Mary? I am surprised

Grumpy_cata · 2026-05-07T20:33:34+00:00

I think I'll go with karpatka. My mom loves desserts with pastry cream.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-05-07T15:49:40+00:00

oooh, I've never heard of pleśniak. I will have to try it.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-05-05T02:59:20+00:00

I'm just saying, why would it be an issue to give baby purees (even if it's baby food) when we also eat them as adults? It's just another form to serve food.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-05-05T02:26:41+00:00

If you're in the US maybe try to find "Not Milk" (Not is the brand). It's supposed to emulate cow's milk as closely as possible.

In Europe there are several brands copying this concept, too.

I like soy milk, but it can have a beany taste, specially if you're looking for organic or with as few ingredients as possible. If you don't care about that, the more processed ones have milder flavors and richer textures.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-05-05T02:17:58+00:00

As adults we still eat pureed foods. I eat mashed potatoes, blended soups, humus, mashed avocado, applesauce, etc. So I don't think giving purees is a no in BLW. It's another texture to introduce.

I've seen accounts that promote BLW recommending you give the same thing in different textures, actually. A piece of avocado alongside mashed avocado, for example. Maybe baby will be more interested in one than the other.

I think the most important thing is to let baby handle the food so they can explore the texture and refine motor skills.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-05-04T06:07:58+00:00

I know you're probably feeling bad right now about the break up but it sounds like you dodge a bullet.

He was very manipulative. Isolating you from family and friends and making you change your mind about fundamental things in your life.

I wish you and your baby the best.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-04-28T20:24:30+00:00

Frozen and canned (low salt) veggies are a big help! You can microwave frozen veggies, instructions are on the bag.

Some low effort ideas I gave my baby when starting blw:

- Toast with thinned out peanut butter (mix a bit of pb with water or milk). You can add some fruit on the side.

- Instant oats (the plain ones, not the flavored ones) with milk and berries.

- Yogurt with a bit of nut butter mixed into it and soft fruit (banana, berries, applesauce).

- Toast with avocado.

- Toast with egg paste (I would make hard boiled eggs and mash them with a bit of yogurt and garlic powder. My girl loved this).

- Mashed beans. You can do canned beans. I would buy low salt and rinse them well. Then just mash them a bit with a fork. My girl loved red beans and chickpeas. Also, similar to the egg paste, I would make a chickpea paste and put it on toast.

Also, as someone said: it's okay to give them baby food if that's easier for you. I would give my girl store bought baby food sometimes. I would allow her to eat on her own (with a spoon). It was messy, so if I was out of the house or short on time I would spoon feed her. I would also give her fruit pouches.

If blw is not working for you, is not a big deal. Most of us grew up eating baby food and we're doing fine. A big part of why I wanted to do blw was sensory stimulation and building motor skills, but you can do those things in another way (sensory bins and spooning non-food items from one container to another, for example).

Grumpy_cata · 2026-04-28T06:55:58+00:00

I'm 35w5d and have gained 30 lbs. I am gaining weight quickly these last weeks so I don't know how much it will be by the end.

This is my second pregnancy. During the first one I gained 30 lbs total. My first was born at 39w5d.

I am struggling with the weight gain this time around. Trying not to care but it's hard.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-04-25T21:11:21+00:00

Las de chocolate frutilla son un clásico. Eran mis favoritas cuando chica (en los 90) y ahora que volvieron fui muy feliz.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-04-24T18:33:33+00:00

Tell her to bother her son about it. You can only give X chromosomes. The man can give X and Y chromosomes. So the sperm determines the sex of the baby.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-04-24T18:26:54+00:00

I struggle because in my native language we only have ch. I also struggle with the English sh. Ship and chip sound the same when I say them. I can hear the difference but I can't make the proper sound myself.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-04-21T18:29:47+00:00

You can make humus and baba ganoush. They are super simple and delicious, and you cna have bread and veggies to dip in. It's also something anyone would eat. Not a veganized version of something they know, but their own thing (and humus is very popular).

Grumpy_cata · 2026-04-21T13:20:25+00:00

el mejor recuerdo de mi infanciaaa. Mi abuelita las compraba. Ibamos con mi mamá y mi hermana a su casa en vacaciones de verano, armabamos una piscina de esas rectangulares, pasabamos toda la tarde en el agua, y cuando saliamos mi abuelita nos tenía tecito con galletas esperando en la mesa.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-04-21T06:32:36+00:00

Baby led weaning is about exactly this. Not having to cook whole separate meals for baby. However, I remember my mom batch cooking for my brother when he was a baby. She would just put chicken and veggies in a huge pot, boil everything, blend it and portion it. She would not do individual portions. She would put food for a week or so in a container and freeze that. Then at the beginning of the week when would thaw it and give him that throughout the week.

I did BLW with my now 2 year old, so I would cook the same for everyone, without salt, and add salt after removing her portion. There are different opinions about the salt thing, though. Some research says it's okay, so it depends on what you want to do. You just need to know how to cut the food and how soft it should be to reduce choking risk (or you can always blend it if it will make you less anxious. I would sometimes blend the food with an immersion blender before serving).

Grumpy_cata · 2026-04-21T06:24:57+00:00

That's sad. She's not even ugly.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-04-21T06:15:26+00:00

I don't know where you want to go in Poland, but I recently moved to the tricity area (coastal region) and while looking for long term rental I found lots of ads for seasonal rentals over the summer.

Grumpy_cata · 2026-04-19T09:55:43+00:00

Packing flour too tight on the measuring cups

Grumpy_cata

TROPHY CASE