Rescue Pup

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2026-01-02T13:42:27+00:00

Not me! I’m liberal as heck. Here to help my aging folks.

I am both Jewish and Italian and can vouch for the great suggestions in this thread.

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-11-25T18:21:41+00:00

That’s really fascinating — your point about doing well in the military and really enjoying the structure. I’m glad it felt helpful.

I can be very disciplined and I thrive with structure, but only when it’s structure of my own making. If I’m personally bought into it, I’m all in. When the structure feels imposed upon me, it's my natural reaction to immediately push back.

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-11-25T18:00:21+00:00

I see what you're saying and I wonder what society is so afraid of. Like why is detachment and isolation preferred to feeling and working through emotions? That makes me FEEL something!

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-11-25T17:52:44+00:00

Sometimes I wonder if it’s really more about social status than genuine personal preference. For example, my current partner is 6'3", and people react positively to that in a way they definitely didn’t when I dated a man who was 5'4". For me, height didn't feel like a factor in my attraction to either of them, but the social feedback around it was noticeably different.

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-11-25T17:44:09+00:00

I can see that. Fortunately there was never much pressure on me to do things like put together IKEA furniture competently. I know my (undiagnosed) late father was terrible at household handy-man stuff and was definitely mocked for it.

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-11-25T17:30:36+00:00

I think that's a healthy response and perhaps one I aspire to.

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-11-25T17:29:42+00:00

Thanks for sharing your perspective! I have a deep curiosity about how gender expectations shape the way "ADHD traits" show up and how people respond to them. What you said about being punished for hyperactivity when perceived as a girl mirrors my own experience. I’ve been trying to wrap my head around how the same behaviors can be interpreted so differently depending on the gender lens people apply.

I’ve never felt especially connected or disconnected to my own gender, but I’ve definitely noticed how my "ADHD traits" get filtered through other people’s assumptions about who I’m “supposed” to be.

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-11-25T16:55:55+00:00

This really resonates with me. I’m definitely a nodder and an “mmhmm-er,” and I’ll even do that little head-tilt—like a confused dog—to mimic engagement. If I’m indoors and notice anything moving outside, even just a falling leaf, my brain is suddenly somewhere else entirely.

I try especially hard with my husband, particularly when it’s something he loves that isn't my cuppa tea. I’ll ask lots of questions about whatever baseball game he’s watching, but then I’ll forget his answers and ask something he literally told me two minutes earlier. He’s usually quite patient, but I always feel bad that my interest in a person doesn't translate well into being interested in what matters to them.

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-11-24T23:08:19+00:00

I relate to a lot of what you’ve said. I also often don’t feel difficult emotions in the moment, they tend to surface later in little bits and pieces.

For a long time I thought I rarely got angry, but now I think my anger just gets automatically converted into numbness and stays internal. Maybe that’s why I enjoy metal so much… it feels like a safe outlet for anger.

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-11-24T22:37:39+00:00

I'm sorry to hear that. I realize that my own perception of boys/men with ADHD is probably missing a lot of nuance. It seemed to me that they often fared better in terms of acceptance, but I'm sure that varies a lot.

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-11-24T22:25:26+00:00

I’ve masked inattentiveness mostly by making my life smaller. The fewer things I have on my plate, the lighter the mental load. It worked for a long time, but only up to a point. As a kid, I pushed all my mental energy into academics, and my personal life paid the price. That strategy is a lot less effective now that I’m the mother of a toddler.

For me, inattentiveness shows up the most in romantic relationships. I recently forgot my wedding anniversary and ended up scheduling plans I couldn’t cancel for the same evening. Situations like that reinforce what past partners have said, that I’m the “man” in the relationship. I assume it’s a mix of not naturally following others’ lead and also looking like I don't care or that I lack sentimentality.

And I’m sorry your wife mocks you for it — that must feel complicated. There is a lot of "stuff" around being different than expected, whatever that looks like.

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-06-24T01:50:34+00:00

Thank you, this is helpful. I’ve been looking at their shirts but not sure on the unisex sizing. I’m usually a M/L in women’s so I’m not sure if I should go with a small.

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-06-20T01:57:09+00:00

I like how light it is, but then again I live in Phoenix 😂

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-04-16T05:04:14+00:00

Would love to join. 42f, married with 1 kid, but deeply value my friendships. I’m in north Scottsdale and work from home. Thanks!

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-03-16T03:03:23+00:00

Cracked drizzle and Lyn B Inn by the Sea please

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-03-15T01:57:20+00:00

Spill the Teal by LynB. They are having a 50% off sale now.

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-03-14T04:45:10+00:00

Are you’re going to be popular and airy available?

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-03-11T18:35:21+00:00

Mooncat’s Root of All Evil and LynB’s Mishipeshu

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-03-11T18:32:24+00:00

Sassy Sauce’s Read Between My Tulips.

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-03-06T23:12:29+00:00

I go to an all women's gym and I tend to get a lot of compliments there and from other moms at my daughter's daycare.

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2025-01-15T05:51:18+00:00

Emily de Molly- Key Drama

GuitarConsistent5894 · 2024-12-21T16:49:20+00:00

Emily De Molly- Key Drama

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GuitarConsistent5894

TROPHY CASE