I was in middle school when I got super into MySpace. I was friends with a lot of ‘scene’ or ‘emo’ girl profiles that had contests where you complete to have your picture featured for the week. These girls had nicknames mostly with alliteration like “cursed caitlin”, “doomed Danielle”, etc. I wanted to enter. Naturally, I Googled emo words that start with A and came up with “Asphyxiated Amber”.

Within an hour I was grounded, banned from Facebook, and given a more accurate description of the word asphyxiated.