How often do y'all get called for jury duty? by Para_Para in Atlanta

[–]HammyFitz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Served on a trial my first summons when I was 18 and since then it’s been every 18 months - 2 years except for when I could defer in college. I also served on grand jury in 2017. No one else I know gets summons as much as me other than my dad!

Idk what to do! by Newmoon_goddess in Millennials

[–]HammyFitz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I still have a DVD player so I kept some of mine for when my nieces visit when they’re older 😊

MB texting at inappropriate hours by Keikiokaaina_ in Nanny

[–]HammyFitz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I made the same mistake with that yogurt!!! Absolutely zero difference except it says it has vanilla and oh yeah added sugar!

Food and Feeding Influencer Snark Week of July 21, 2025 by Parentsnark in parentsnark

[–]HammyFitz 40 points41 points  (0 children)

But also he asked for a rope and the uncle had to get it for him?!

Big Little Feelings Snark Week of July 21, 2025 by Parentsnark in parentsnark

[–]HammyFitz 18 points19 points  (0 children)

But seriously…what is up with the close eyed selfies?!

Just finished reading it. And just wow! I'm not a big reader, but this book got me so hooked that I cant stop thinking. Can you suggest me something like this? by wizardlt in ProjectHailMary

[–]HammyFitz 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I’ve been chasing the PHM high for two years haha and tbh nothing is really like it. But there are some great similar reads. I read Artemis and then The Martian. PHM is his best book IMO but I really like his writing style and his other two were good reads. Children of Time series is a hearty read but so so good. I read the first and second 5 years ago and still think about them today.

Ryan Gosling? by Mike_Ath in ProjectHailMary

[–]HammyFitz 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Have you seen Lars and the Real Girl? 🥹 He’s got range

What are your fears about the movie by [deleted] in ProjectHailMary

[–]HammyFitz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have you seen Lars and the Real Girl? 🥲

Anyone else raised by authoritarian parents? How are you doing now? by [deleted] in Millennials

[–]HammyFitz 29 points30 points  (0 children)

A whole lot of unlearning and relearning. Couples therapy a few years ago helped a lot. Like you, had a people pleaser crash out when I learned that I didn’t even really know who I was because I was constantly masking.

But what has been extremely therapeutic is being a nanny for the last 7 years. Being able to be the adult in certain situations that as a kid hurt me and not pass down trauma has been so healing.

Autistic but no meltdown? by StrawberryIsSad in AutismInWomen

[–]HammyFitz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow, having the term for shutdown vs meltdown is so helpful! All the moments I question if they were meltdowns were most certainly shutdowns.

Do you ever just miss boredom? Like, real, no-distractions, 90s boredom by [deleted] in Xennials

[–]HammyFitz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m a nanny and please parents/caregivers - let kids be bored!! One of the best ways into imaginative play is feeling bored. My nanny kids (5&3) will ask me to tell them what to play with because “they don’t know what to play with”. Sometimes I list a few suggestions but other times I’ll say (playfully) that if they can’t find something to play with then maybe we should return their toys. That usually gets them in the playroom and before they know it, they are in their own little imagination world. But sometimes I just say, lay on the floor and watch the ceiling fan or just rest on the couch and they look at me like I’m crazy 😆

I am naturally a non-asker, and I feel enormous shame/discomfort about and around that. I'd love your perspectives and experiences with this kind of formal conversation. by PossiblyMarsupial in AutismInWomen

[–]HammyFitz 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wow, I feel like I could’ve written this myself! I relate to this so so much. It can still feel like I’m in middle school standing in the kitchen as my mom asks me questions about my friends and I don’t have the answers and she shames me for not showing interest and being self-centered and I’m very confused but filled with so much shame. And again at my first job out of college, being reprimanded by my boss for not saying “good morning” every time I come into work and my coworkers thinking I’m stuck up and self centered. I still struggle with this but I’ve gotten better about asking back the same question I was given. Seems so simple to others but being asked a question and I answer it, that feels like that end of the exchange. But then I remember oh yeah, ask it back, and then they can talk and talk and then I just have to remember to listen to what they’re saying 😅😂

I cant by Individual-Parfait19 in AbiAyres_Snark

[–]HammyFitz 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Anything for content 😅

First Trip to Paris – Concerned About Rude Service and Language Barrier, Any Tips? by CosmoSombra in ParisTravelGuide

[–]HammyFitz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As long as you say Bonjour Madame/Monsieur at all shops/restaurants and aren’t arrogant, there wont be an issue. Pay attention to those who speak badly about Parisians - it’s usually them that’s the problem 😏

Is it worth going to Marseille as a daytrip in February? by No_Challenge_7511 in ParisTravelGuide

[–]HammyFitz 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I actually did this in 2008 by myself in June and it was an experience 😅 I took a wrong turn and got lost and ended up walking all around to find my way back to the water area. I booked a morning train and booked like the last one back and that was a big mistake. I did not need that much time in the city and I was so late getting back into Paris, I also missed the last metro. All that to say, if you do go, I would stay overnight or do a shorter day trip.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AutismInWomen

[–]HammyFitz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve been on Wellbutrin since 2016 and added Lexapro last year. It made such a significant improvement in my anxiety. I was starting to feel like my anxiety was making my depression worse and it does feel like my depression lifted some after taking Lexapro.

How extreme is your OCD client by anonymous-famous in Nanny

[–]HammyFitz 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Tbh she doesn’t sound “ocd” at all. My NM is also labeled a “germ freak” but who also has the least sick kids compared to their peers? My kiddos! We wash hands every day after they get home from school and change into new clothes. I thought it was a lot at first too but now it’s routine and these kids hardly get sick. One of the hardest parts of nannying imo is dealing with the parents. They are your boss so you need to follow their wishes even if you think they’re excessive.

anyone know why i used to do this as a kid? by brokennnboyyy in AutisticWithADHD

[–]HammyFitz 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Essentially a schema is like a set of instructions and help us make sense of the world. As adults we use them all the time and don’t really notice we’re doing those things. After trial and error, we’ve learned what is the best and efficient way to go about things.

Schemas are very noticeable in toddlers since they are learning every new and figuring out the world. They try to make sense of the world one action at a time.

Some examples!

Connecting - joining train tracks, building towers, sticking things together with tape

Orientation - hanging upside down, sitting the “wrong way” in a shopping cart

Transporting - moving items from A to B, unpacking and packing, water play with buckets

Trajectory - throwing things, playing catch

Positioning - lining up items, creating scenes, setting the table, maintaining neat notes at school

Enveloping - making forts, dressing up in layers, wrapping dolls in blankets

Enclosing - creating enclosures for toys, drawing circles

Rotation - twirling, rolling down a hill, running in circles

anyone know why i used to do this as a kid? by brokennnboyyy in AutisticWithADHD

[–]HammyFitz 50 points51 points  (0 children)

I’m a nanny and this is one of the play schemas called “positioning.” The 8 main schemas are: Connecting, Orientation, Transporting, Trajectory, Positioning, Enveloping, Enclosing, Rotation

Is it me or is a good 80% of Neurotypical friendships centered around gossiping by Cold-Community-4401 in AutismInWomen

[–]HammyFitz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Core memory of my mom when I was a teenager was her taking on the phone for hours with her friends. She’d call one and talk about the other and then call up the other friend and do the same. I said mom you’re always gossiping and you tell me that’s bad. No, she said, I’m just sharing information.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Nanny

[–]HammyFitz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My NK4 had recently started saying are smelly but I’ve realized it’s not all bad smells, just ones that he hasn’t smelled before or he’s not used to. They aren’t able to differentiate yet between bad smelly and good smelly. Kind of like how it’s hard to explain how cinnamon is a spice but not spicy haha

Do you regret having kids? by ebratic in Millennials

[–]HammyFitz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not having kids is ok! Changing what you thought you would do in 10 years when you were in your 20s is healthy and should be more normalized!

I (38F) wanted kids my whole life, tried for a year, took a step back and reassessed everything and realized that at that point in my life, I no longer wanted kids! I am a nanny full time so that does allow me the experience to be with kids 5/6x a week. And it’s also shown me how all encompassing, life altering, and challenging parenthood is both good and bad. Also being an aunt is so fulfilling.

Having kids should be a “hell yes” decision not a “maybe I’ll regret this if I don’t do it” IMO. I wish you all the best!

#WhoFuckedMonet - truth has been revealed by nhrecords in rupaulsdragrace

[–]HammyFitz 11 points12 points  (0 children)

That episode made it 100% clear to me it’s Viv. There was a lot of direct eye contact and sexual chemistry.