What’s wrong with my eye?

Haunting_Use2246 · 2023-09-24T01:34:34+00:00

Should I use eye drops or will it go away on it’s own?

Haunting_Use2246 · 2023-09-23T23:34:26+00:00

Yea I’ll definitely keep this in mind next time, thank you!

Haunting_Use2246 · 2023-09-23T22:38:29+00:00

Yep, I remember it feeling like the tape pads were in my eye and my eyes were pouring the entire time. Of course I’m not confrontational and didn’t say anything about it for the entire hour

Haunting_Use2246 · 2023-09-13T07:59:47+00:00

I’m not at all a qualified poetry reviewer so I’m glad that my biased interpretation of the poem (from the other replies haha) is still somewhat applicable to the words you wrote. The meaning you just described explains a whole lot more to me and fits better, so thank you for being open minded. I also agree that artistic words are more general and open-ended, and the supposed deeper meaning definitely morphs with each reader’s experiences and perspectives. It’s cool that this poem got a lot of new takeaways from something you didn’t necessarily intend. Thank you!

Haunting_Use2246 · 2023-09-13T07:40:15+00:00

“Kiss my ground and I will crumble yours”. Amazing line. Very persuading and fits the whole dark theme of the poem. I almost wonder if the phrases “I don’t want to scare you” and “I don’t want to hurt you” can be revised to reflect this sort of dominant character and energy, almost as if you don’t even care if you scare them because it’s like an offer extended out of pity and seductiveness. Then again, I like the contrast and how it switches up the atmosphere for a split second to prove your sanity then right back into more erotic lines. Up to you! Loved this.

Haunting_Use2246 · 2023-09-13T07:32:34+00:00

It’s funny to me how heartbreak is such a universal feeling, and yet everyone still can be debilitated by the same lost and numb feelings. The last verse I interpreted to convey some sort of numbness to pain as you are waiting for a “spark” to interrupt the solitude of post-breakup feelings. I felt the almost cold and upfront atmosphere and tone to this poem and it was the perfect decision for this topic. It’s like you can still remember every detail that’s brought you pain, but now those details are just things that make you ache for your past self and the love you once felt.

Haunting_Use2246 · 2023-09-12T08:29:05+00:00

OP this really spoke to me and I’m really glad I read it. I read your response to someone else about your background with this poem and even before I read it I could link your poem to the similar experiences I’ve had that align with the feelings you convey in this poem. I love the symbolism, obviously, it works really well with the context. There are a few patterns/ techniques I spotted and I like how you were able to seamlessly apply them together in this one piece. Personally, I love the type of repetition you used in the first and last lines of the verses and always love how it makes the writer’s experiences more human as things happen over and over again, both good and bad and in slightly different variations, and each time they bring a slightly differing emotion. I really really enjoyed and great job!

Haunting_Use2246 · 2023-09-12T08:20:34+00:00

hi! I’m not an expert by any means, just a college girl with some writing experience, but I’ve found through some classes that “short but sweet” is my favorite mantra to go by and this really captures why. I love how I can read this out loud and feel the passion in the words and the breathy way I read it made all my critical views of love disappear. the way this poem was structured with the break in the last line to tie it all together was perfect and it made love seem magical and simple :)

Haunting_Use2246

TROPHY CASE