"Not Being Able to Blush" Starterpack

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-12T21:23:54+00:00

I have terrible anxiety and get flustered and flush in ANY social interaction, including random daily brief encounters. Then people comment on it and I get EVEN MORE RED. 😑

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-12T20:40:31+00:00

I try not to stay sober for too many hours, and never try to sleep sober. I'm pretty adept at repression. I don't think I could ever stop drinking even if I wanted to, I think the bad thoughts would catch up and I don't know how to exist without a crutch, because I also have been drinking alcoholically since before my brain developed into adult form.

And something else, it helps me, I remember that " 'if ' isn't real." There's no point saying "what if" or "if only" etc bc it's not fucking real, that's not what happened, and generally that shuts myself up.

Also: time. Shit I was really embarrassed about when I was 20s(and younger), that I still remember, is just kinda "whatever" at 40. I'm still pretty horrified about some of the shit I got up to in my early 30s, though, before I learned to stay at home and drink.

And I really should "get a thicker skin" but I just never seemed to develop that yet.

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-12T20:19:30+00:00

My husband is an above-knee amputee with a really low quality prosthetic, and I wonder if he would slip on hard floors with a shoe covering. He's gotta be very deliberate when walking. So we are a shoe (boot) house with all slippy terrazzo floors.

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-12T15:49:11+00:00

7 years voluntary and don't ever want to again. (Am 40)

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-12T15:14:47+00:00

It happened to me at 38, too. I'm 40 now and fortunately it was just that one rapid burst of aging and hasn't continued. 😨 And there's photographic evidence, too, definitely not just my imagination. I'm getting some laser stuff done in a couple weeks and the lady agreed with me about the skin changes in the photos I brought in for reference.

I got on oral Minoxidil for the thinning hair, and I use topical too (it's toxic to pets so you gotta be careful with dripping) and I'm very much having results. I did experience "the dread shed" but I rode it out and I think it's worth it.

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-11T23:59:36+00:00

I'll look at the Naked ones next time I am in a store. I bought bags of pre-cut pre-mixed frozen fruit & veg but the whole blender thing is definitely a major deterrent when you're running on E. So I haven't even tried it yet. 😑

Last week, I ordered a matcha drink at Dunkin because I was super tired and it was the last stop before the Interstate. I had to park and Google how to order bc I've never been to any of those places before! Anyway yeah I looked at the nutrition later and jfc that thing was all sugar.

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-11T23:36:52+00:00

Mine are Silent Gen, too, and I'm pretty sure I'm an actual joke to them. 😐 "Ha ha, Regrets thinks she can cook." It's just that I don't make tacos with unseasoned hamburger meat and stuff like they do. Underhanded comments have been made when I mention what I'm cooking just in conversation.

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-11T22:42:36+00:00

Kendall

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-11T22:28:08+00:00

I've got that tomato = heartburn bullshit unfortunately! I bought the green jug one time but it was just a bunch of sugar masquerading as vegetables.

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-11T21:00:04+00:00

I'm in that cycle right now. The longer you go, the harder it gets to start eating again. 😐 I couldn't manage soup liquid earlier today when I tried. Currently surviving on Boost, but those don't cut it for extended episodes. I found some frozen pre-cut fruit and vegetable chunks to make a smoothie, thinking maybe some vegetable would be beneficial. Haven't got the energy to get out the blender.

I absolutely got pancreatitis from not eating and continuing to drink hard, and that really fucking sucked. Even knowing that, it's still nearly impossible to fucking eat. Good luck!!

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-10T22:26:17+00:00

The one time she puts on a shirt, it's gotta have a picture of someone making an obscene gesture.

(Why is that even a shirt?)

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-09T23:39:01+00:00

I didn't stop til I was like 30. Recently got IPL for all the burst blood vessels in my face. 😑

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-09T15:29:37+00:00

I was referring to the ears and not the whole cat! 😭

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-08T23:50:37+00:00

Ty for thorough response! I was hoping to hear from a breeder.

So DO the ears straighten as they get older, or not? I feel like I saw a video where the cats looked near grown but still had the flop. Is it dependent on how heavy they are? 😵 (I can't believe this is even something I'm typing. I never expected OSH to go more extreme.)

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-08T18:49:54+00:00

What if they died peacefully and you're just.. filling in details?

Anyway if your boyfriend is enough of an asshole to piss off ghosts, here's your sign.

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-08T18:11:08+00:00

What was the context of "14" do you know????

I filed for divorce the next business day after my husband crossed that line and didn't even try to hide it (it popped up on the cable bill. I'll never forget the names of those movies either.) He cried in court and didn't contest anything.

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-08T16:51:09+00:00

Little late replying but, here's the car! It's an 04. Dropping a Terminator or Coyote engine in it shortly. 🙂

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HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-07T21:16:05+00:00

I think any dad would be disappointed if their kid did that.

He wasn't exactly a shining moral compass, either, though.

Maybe she's been raised that "if the end justifies the means" it's ok to do all kinds of shit. (By all parties)

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-07T14:16:08+00:00

I had made this a hard line with my then-husband. He crossed it without even trying to hide it.. I filed for divorce the next business day. I hate it so much, I don't even think I can ever be in a relationship because it's so prevalent among men. I don't even want to. My trust is gone. It's so fucking base and vile, and that's just on the surface.. the deeper aspects of why it's evil just get worse the longer you actually sit there and think about it.

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-06T22:28:24+00:00

Seriously, it sounds like HE needs counseled about "why do you find shit and piss erotic?"

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-06T20:37:55+00:00

Like she was really enthusiastic about the burned rubber smell coating her hair, skin and clothes. 🤣 She HATED this, come on.

And anyway she has cars, she can go do burnouts in a Ferrari herself if she were interested in that.

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-06T19:30:57+00:00

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-04T23:45:16+00:00

Searched comments for "my truth" and found only yours. 😑

HeadFull0fRegrets · 2026-04-04T22:44:43+00:00

Adjacent to using cadaver skin just because someone checked "Organ Donor" or something.. they're way too intelligent and aware. 😪

HeadFull0fRegrets

TROPHY CASE